Kana P.O.V.
“I’m sorry.” I told Suga.

Suga looked at me with an expression that was mixed with confusion and pain. “Why? I thought you just said that you loved me too. Well you sort of did.”

I couldn’t look at Suga in the eyes. I was afraid if I looked into his eyes I’ll lose it. I was really afraid if I looked at his eyes I would forget all about Sadako and her feelings for Suga. “I can’t tell you why. But, I can’t be your girlfriend. I’m sorry. I have to go now. Thanks for comforting me. I appreciate it.”

I quickly picked up my backpack and headed out the door before Suga could stop me. I wasn’t sure if I would be able to resist the urge to stay at his house if he had told me to stay. I wasn’t taking the risk. So I headed out as fast as I could.

Where do I go now? It’s kind of late. Hee-Young and A-Yeon are out. If I go to Linda…No. Then I’ll have to explain what happened with Jimin. It’ll hurt her so much. I can’t go to Sadako, I have to explain what happened between Suga and me. I had nowhere to go. I couldn’t go back to my own house. I couldn’t go to my friends. I couldn’t go to Suga’s home. And then I finally remembered a person that I might be able to rely on.

Jungkook.

I pulled out my phone and quickly called him. It took a few seconds for Jungkook to pick up.

“Hello?” I heard.

“Hey, Jungkook! It’s me! Kana! I need you to do me a favor.” I told him quickly then explained to him how I needed to stay at his place for a while.

He agreed happily and so we met up at the neighborhood’s part and headed to Jungkook’s house.

The second we entered Jungkook’s house the scent of delicious homemade chocolate chip cookies hit me like a brick wall. The smell could not be described with words. There was a middle aged woman standing by the dining table placing a whole plate of freshly baked chocolate chip cookies on the table. She looked at to see Jungkook and me standing on the doorway.

“Hey mom. I’m back.” Jungkook greeted warmly.

“Hello, ma’am.” I greeted politely and gave a 90 degree bow.

Jungkook’s mom seemed to like that and she gave Jungkook and me a big smile. “Wow! Honey, I’m so proud of you! Got yourself such a polite and sweet girlfriend! She’s really pretty too!”

“Oh! No, ma’am. It’s nothing like that. Kookie and I are nothing more than close friends. I’m not his girlfriend. We’re not dating.” I explained.

Jungkook’s mother smirked and said, “Is she speaking the truth, darling? It’s fine to have a girlfriend. She even gave you a cute nickname! Kookie!”

“Mom!” Jungkook cried in embarrassment as his face started to turn as red as a tomato.
Jungkook’s mother held both her hands up above her head do the ‘I surrender’ sign, but she was still smirking. “Whatever you say, darling. Whatever you say.”

Jungkook led me to his room which was on the third floor of his house. As we were walking up, we heard Jungkook’s mother yell, “Jungkook! Remember to use a condom!”

My face immediately turned red from the fact that Jungkook thought Jungkook and me were going to have sex.

“We are NOT having sex mom!” Jungkook yelled back. We went inside his room and he slammed the door shut.

He turned to me apologized. “Sorry Kana. My mom is a bit…weird. Well, I’m pretty sure you already realized that.”

I shook my head. “Don’t apologize. It’s totally fine. Your mom is cool. At least she’s cooler than my mom.”

I placed my backpack next to his bed as Jungkook sat down on his queen size bed and patted the area next to him. “Sit.” He told me. I sat down next to him.

“So, what’s the matter? Did your mom kick you out of your house?” Jungkook asked me.
I shook my head. Jungkook kept questioning me about what was wrong. I wanted to tell him the truth and explain everything, but then I might end up really hurting him. I didn’t want to tell him about how Sadako likes a guy. But it wasn’t him.

“I can’t tell you.” I tried telling him.

“Why?” He questioned. “I’ll listen. Did someone hurt you? Who is it? I’ll go beat that person up.”

I let out a fake laugh and shook my head. “There’s no need for that. You can’t go beat that person up. Plus, it’s not just one problem.”

Jungkook started to look really worried. “More than one? Then why don’t you tell me? I will try my best to help you solve those problems. I promise I’ll try.”

“It’s not that. If you want to know the truth so you can help me, you’ll be the one that will get hurt in the end. I don’t want that to happen. You’re my friend.” I told Jungkook, who was listening very intensely.

“You’re my friend too. Please just tell me the truth. Or else I will personally go into your house and find out why you cannot go there.” Jungkook replied.

“No! Kookie! Please don’t go to my house! Please!” I begged. I didn’t want him to see anything in case Jimin was still in there with…with…Erin.

I broke down once more. The scars Suga was able to close temporally opened once again. And this time it hurt more.

“KANA! TELL ME ALREADY! I DON’T CARE IF I GET HURT! IT HURTS ME MORE TO SEE A FRIEND OF MINE LIKE THIS!” Jungkook told me. So I finally decided to spill the beans and tell him the truth.

I took a deep breath as Jungkook wiped away my tears. I sighed and said, “So…Jimin told me he had personal business to do today so I had to walk home alone. But when I got home, I found him. In MY room. On MY bed. And fucking a girl. And to make everything worse, he was fucking ERIN. Why can’t he just tell me that he had feelings for Erin? Why did he hide it from me and tell me to go home myself? Did he not want me to know? And also, he was fucking her on MY bed. He obviously had no respect for my family and my house. He was probably trying to tell my mother and me that he hated us and did not want to be family with us. I was offended and hurt. So I decided to go to Suga’s house because I didn’t want to see that bastard in my house. And there…Suga told me that he had feelings for me. I was so happy. I forgot all about Jimin and Erin for a second there. I had a crush on Suga for quite some time now. But in the end. I had to reject him. Even though I really liked Suga.”

Jungkook nodded then stopped. “So why couldn’t you tell me all these problems you were going through? And why would I be hurt? And why did you reject Suga when you just said that you had feelings for him too? It doesn’t make sense.”

“It doesn’t make sense because I didn’t finish. The reason I rejected Suga is also the reason why you might be hurt.” I said to Jungkook, hoping he would finally give up and I didn’t need to tell him the next part. No luck. Jungkook pressed on. He absolutely need to know.

“Kana. I need to know why.” Jungkook said. Almost pleading at this point now.

I sighed, gave him a pained expression and told him, “Kookie…If I tell you why, don’t hate me for it.”

He nodded and waited for my answer eagerly.

“I rejected Suga…because Sadako…Sadako really, really, really likes Suga. And by that I mean she likes Suga more than a friend.” I finally said after hesitating for another minute.

Jungkook simply sat back on his bed and looked into space. After a moment of silence, as if he was processing the information I just gave him, he said, “OOOOOH. So THAT’S the reason you didn’t want to tell me. I see. It’s fine.”

‘You are NOT fine.’ I thought to myself.

“Jungkook…I’m sorry. Sadako actually started liking Suga just recently. I couldn’t bring myself to tell you. It was so sudden and unexpected. I’m sorry. I-”.

Jungkook placed a finger on my lips and whispered, “Kana. Shhh. It’s fine. Don’t apologize. It’s not your fault.”

I looked at his face and he flashed me his usual bright bunny smile. But I knew that it was covering his emotional state. And his emotional state isn’t good.

“Are you sure?” I asked.

He nodded.

I looked at the clock and realized my mother and Jimin’s father were going to be back soon. I had to go back before my mother realizes I’m not home and she’ll start questioning where I had been. And today I have been at two people’s house, and both people were guys. My mother definitely not like the sound of that. I would be dead if she found out.

“Jungkook, I have to head home now. My mother is coming back soon.” I explained.

Jungkook made an ‘oh’ face and nodded. “Is Erin gone by now though?” Jungkook asked.

“She should be.” I said as I took my bad and started heading downstairs as Jungkook followed me. I felt uneasy. Even though Jungkook says he’s fine, I have a strong feeling that he’s actually not fine at all.
As Jungkook and I reached the door, Jungkook’s mother told me goodbye as I stepped out the door. Before I went, I spun around and wanted to properly apologize to him. No matter how many times he says he’s not hurt, I knew he was.

Jungkook seemed like he had the ability to read other people’s minds. If it was true, I wouldn’t be surprised. Because it seemed like he read my mind. Before I could even open my mouth so I could properly apologize to him, Jungkook placed a finger on my lips again and told me, “Kana don’t apologize. You didn’t hurt me. It wasn’t your fault. Don’t blame it on yourself. Don’t say that if your fault. It’s not. You were the best friend ever. You handled the situation beautifully. That’s what I like about you. You were able to give up Suga for Sadako. You are the most amazing person I’ve ever met.”

“Thank you, Kookie.” I replied and smiled.

Jungkook gave me his usual adorable smile at the sight of me smiling.

As I walked home, I looked up to the sky, which was now filled with a beautiful gradient of yellow, orange, red, and purple, and whispered into the air-


“Thank you Jungkook. Thank you for your kind lie.”

Notes