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If You

Happy New Year

Emily hobbled out of the elevator, her new crutches already annoying her. One of BIGBANG’s trainers had examined her ankle and pronounced it only badly sprained. “You should be walking unaided in a week or two,” he said, smiling like it was good news.

Two weeks? Emily thought, making her way down the handicap ramp. It’s only been two hours and I’m ready to scream!

Seungri and Seunghyun were the only ones in the lobby, surrounded by their staff as they prepared to depart. “You made it!” Seungri exclaimed, waving to her. “Barely,” Emily grumbled, weaving around the group carefully. She sat down on a nearby bench and sighed gratefully. “Okay, can someone please explain last night to me?” she asked, glancing back and forth between them.

Seunghyun glanced at the people swarming around them before answering. “I’m honestly not sure,” he said, sitting next to her. “Jiyong’s been through a lot emotionally over the past few weeks. He’s probably just a little over-sensitive right now. Once we’re in Bangkok he’ll snap out of it.”

I don’t know how much longer I can keep up with Jiyong’s emotions, Emily thought. She caught sight of Jiyong and the others hurrying down the stairs, bags in tow. “It’s about time!” Seunghyun exclaimed, standing up.

“Yeah, Emily’s on crutches and she still beat you down,” Seungri commented, sipping his coffee smugly.

Emily looked at Jiyong, but he avoided her gaze, going to talk to Sagowa instead. Seunghyun gave her a half-smile, shrugging slightly. I hope he’s right about Bangkok, Emily thought.

“Emily! What happened?” Sagowa asked, gesturing to her bandaged foot. “I sprained my ankle on the stairs,” she said ruefully. “I should be off the crutches in a week or so.”

“Thank goodness you didn’t break anything,” Sagowa said, shaking his head. An assistant whispered in his ear and he raised his hands. “Time to go, people,” he announced, sending everyone into a flurry. Seungri helped Emily off of the bench and they went to the waiting car. Emily climbed in with difficulty and sat down with a sigh, pulling her crutches in after her.

“Are you in pain?” Daesung asked, sitting next to her. “Just emotionally,” she mumbled. Seungri choked on his coffee behind her and Seunghyun immediately took the hot drink from him while he coughed.

“Justice is sweet,” Jiyong said, smiling from the passenger seat. Emily raised her eyebrows. “Justice?” she asked. Youngbae shook his head at her as the car pulled away from the hotel.


******


They arrived in Bangkok several hours later, the afternoon sun already beginning to set. Their hotel was rather similar to the one in Hong Kong, with the notable exception of a giant fountain in the lobby. Daesung and Youngbae wanted to take pictures near it and tried to get Emily to join in, but she declined. “I’m going to lay down,” she said, getting her room key from Sagowa. She got into the elevator, but someone blocked the doors before they could close. “Oh, uh, thanks,” Jiyong said, stepping in awkwardly. Emily pushed the button for the eleventh floor and the elevator began to ascend.

She watched the numbers tick away, trying to think of a way to break the silence. “Is everything okay?” she finally asked. “You seemed upset last night.”

“Yeah, everything’s fine,” Jiyong said abruptly. The doors opened and he stepped out of the elevator. Emily tried to keep up, but her crutches hindered her. “Jiyong, wait!” she hissed. He stopped, allowing her to catch up. “I think you misinterpreted what I said last night.” she said, slightly out of breath. Jiyong shifted uncomfortably, but didn’t say anything.

“I meant that us being friends is an amazing thing, especially considering what a rough start we had. I didn’t want the others ruining that by teasing us.”

Jiyong sighed. “That makes sense,” he admitted.

“So… we're okay?” she asked hopefully.

Jiyong smiled. “Yeah.” They both started giggling, then outright laughing until tears came to their eyes. Emily felt a weight slide off of her as she laughed, leaning heavily on her crutches.

“What’s the matter?” Youngbae asked, stepping off of the elevator. “Nothing!” Jiyong said, and they burst out laughing again. Youngbae raised his eyebrows in confusion. “You’ve both finally snapped, haven’t you?”

Emily wiped her eyes. “Not yet,” she teased. “I’ll see you both later.” She headed down the hallway to her room, still grinning.


******


Jiyong stuck his hands in his pockets, still smiling. Youngbae turned back to him, confusion on his face. “I guess you cleared everything up?” he guessed. Jiyong shook his head. “Not everything.” He took a deep breath. “I shouldn’t have told you about...what happened in Emily’s apartment, especially in such a mean way. I was being vindictive, and I’m sorry.”

Youngbae sighed. “It’s better that I know,” he said, the two of them walking down the hallway. “Though you could’ve been more diplomatic about it.” He rubbed the back of his neck. “I should apologize to Emily.”

“No,” Jiyong said immediately, stopping by his door. “She asked us not to say anything about it. If you apologize, she’ll figure out I told you and get mad at me all over again.” He leaned against the wall. “We’ve had enough drama to last a lifetime,” he murmured, almost to himself. Youngbae laughed. “It is pretty impressive. I’ve never seen two people go through more drama than you and Emily, except for TV characters.”

Jiyong shook his head. “If it makes you feel any better, after you punched Emily Daesung hit you pretty hard in the jaw.”

Youngbae’s mouth dropped. “So that’s why it was so sore!” he exclaimed. “I couldn’t figure it out. I thought I’d fallen or something.”


Jiyong shoved him playfully. “Go get some rest,” he ordered, pulling out his key card. “I don’t need you passing out onstage.” He went into his room and closed the door, leaning against it heavily. It was blissfully quiet, and he closed his eyes, basking in the silence. Finally some peace, he thought gratefully. He made a cup of tea and stood by the window, looking out over the city of Bangkok while he sipped it. Maybe everything will finally start to smooth over.


******


“What do you mean, I’m not on the list?!”

The bouncer folded his arms. “I’m sorry, miss, but there’s no Emily Carter listed here.”

Emily took a deep breath. “I’m part of BIGBANG’s entourage,” she explained. “My ID must be in my bag backstage. I just went back to the hotel to grab a costume and…”

“Uh-uh!” the bouncer cut her off, holding up a hand. “No ID, no list, no entrance.”

Emily sighed. Behind her were several dozen excited fans all waiting to meet BIGBANG, and the screaming wasn’t helping the migraine she was rapidly developing. “Call Mr. Sagowa, he can vouch for me,” she pleaded, massaging her temple with her free hand, clutching a garment bag in the other.

The bouncer snorted. “Look lady, I give you props for coming up with this story, but…”

“There you are, Emily!”

Emily sighed again, this time with relief. “Seungri!” she called, peeking over the bouncer’s shoulder. The fans caught sight of Seungri and screamed, waving their signs and posters frantically. Seungri waved politely as he made his way over to Emily. “It’s okay, she’s with us,” he told the bouncer, already unhooking the velvet rope. The bouncer reluctantly stepped aside, allowing Emily to pass. “Why does she get to go in?” she heard a fan complain, and Emily couldn’t help rolling her eyes.

“Why didn’t you show him your ID?” Seungri asked, guiding her through the chaotic backstage. “I accidentally left it in my bag,” Emily replied, dodging a hurried stagehand with a ladder. “The bouncer didn’t have me on the staff list either. He thought I was a fan.”

“And aren’t you?” Seungri asked cheekily, waving to the lighting crew high above them. Emily rolled her eyes. “You know what I mean,” she said, punching him playfully.

They got back to the dressing room where Daesung was pacing anxiously. “Did you find it?” he asked immediately. Emily held up the garment bag. “It got left in an elevator. Luckily someone turned it in at the front desk in one piece.”

Jieun, the head stylist for BIGBANG, ran over to them, chattering in Korean. She opened the bag rapidly and went through it, then sighed. “All here,” she said, smiling. “Gomabseubnida, Emeelee.”

Cheonman-eyo,” Emily replied, returning her bow. She looked back at Daesung. “I hope some poor assistant doesn’t get fired for this,” she whispered. Daesung bit his lip. “It was actually my fault,” he confessed. “I was kind of...flirting with her on the elevator. She set it down and neither of us remembered to grab it.”

Emily’s mouth dropped. “Daesung!” she said, pretending to be scandalized. “Cheating on me already? What would Mr. Sagowa say?”

“Daesung!” Jieun called, waving a pair of pants over her head. Daesung squeezed Emily’s hand before joining Jieun by the changing screen. The others were dressed and already at hair and makeup, chatting amiably with their stylists. “Did you find the costume?” Jiyong called, his eyes closed while Soo drew on eyeliner.

“Yes,” Emily said, joining them by the mirrors. “Daesung said he was flirting with the assistant and made her forget the bag.”

Seunghyun chuckled, sitting cross-legged in the chair by Jiyong. “Sounds about right,” he said, looking at her in the mirror. His stylist selected a can of hairspray and began spritzing just as Seungri walked by. “Ugh!” he sputtered, grimacing and smacking his lips. “It’s your own fault for walking by with your mouth open,” Jiyong said, his eyes still closed. “Again,” Seunghyun added, examining his hair in the mirror.

10 bun an-e paen seomyeong!” someone called, and the stylists hurried to finish their work. “Where are you watching the concert from?” Youngbae asked, straightening his shirt as he stood up. “From the box,” Emily replied, shouldering her bag. “I’ll choose a new place each time, either in the arena or backstage. I want to get a lot of perspectives.”

“Just don’t forget to enjoy yourself,” Daesung said, checking his makeup in the mirror. “It is a concert, after all.”

“I’ll try.” Emily checked her watch. “You’ve got to get going.” Daesung snatched his jacket off the back of his chair, planted a kiss on her cheek and followed the others out the door. Emily shook her head as she left the dressing room, heading for the manager’s box high above the arena. Sagowa and the other managers were already there, making last-minute phone calls and decisions. “Emily! All is well?” he asked, handing a stack of papers to an assistant. “Yes sir,” she replied, sinking into a chair with a sigh. She discarded her crutches, resisting the urge to throw them to the ground. The arena was already filling up with fans armed with signs, lightsticks and homemade paraphernalia to display during the concert. Emily saw one group of girls that had cutouts of the boys’ faces on wooden dowels, each one decorated with hearts and smiley faces. Some of this stuff is really weird, she thought, jotting down some notes.


******


Weeks passed and soon the end of the year was upon them. They celebrated Christmas in Chongqing, a beautiful Chinese city crisscrossed by rivers and surrounded by mountains. Emily loved it, especially the way the Christmas lights sparkled on the Yangtze River at night. They only spent about a week in each city, so New Year’s Eve found them in Changsha, a bustling city only a few hundred miles from Chongqing. Emily found herself in love with China; the fascinating history, the vibrant culture, the beautiful countryside. She stood on the balcony of her hotel room, watching the sun go down over the river. The wind was cool on her bare arms, and she was high enough up where it drowned out much of the noise from the city below. This is perfect, she thought contentedly, closing her eyes.

“Emily?”

Emily jumped, spinning around instantly. “Oh, it’s you,” she said, putting a hand to her chest. “You scared me.”

“Sorry,” Youngbae said, joining her on the balcony. “Your door was open, so I thought I’d come say hi.” He braced himself on the railing, looking down at the miniscule people below. “Being this high up is almost like being in another world,” he mused. “I wonder if this is how we look from heaven.”

Emily leaned on the railing, looking back out over the city. “Looking straight down like that wouldn’t be much of a view,” she commented. “You have to look all the way across to the horizon to get the real thing.” She pointed at the sunset, now a fiery golden radiance emblazoned across the sky. She glanced at Youngbae. He was transfixed, the golden light softly illuminating his face. “The perfect last sunset,” he whispered. They watched in silence for a while, until the light faded from gold to a dull orange, purple clouds slowly obscuring it.

“Are you coming to the party tonight?” Youngbae asked, looking back at Emily. “I don’t think so,” she replied. “I’m not really a ‘party girl’ ”, she said wryly.

“What?!” Youngbae exclaimed. “Don’t be ridiculous. You can’t ring in the new year alone! Besides, everyone’s looking forward to you being there.”

Emily sighed. “Fine. But I’ll be surprised if I have anything to wear.”

“There you are!” Daesung said, coming out to the balcony. “Seungri thought he saw you come up here. “Aren’t you going to get dressed for the party?”

“Yeah, after I finish convincing Emily to go,” Youngbae replied, winking at her. “You aren’t going?!” Daesung gasped. “You have to go!”

“I said I would, but I don’t think I have anything to wear,” Emily explained.

“Well, we’ll see about that,” Daesung said, reentering her room and making a beeline for her closet. “Let’s see,” he said, opening the door and sorting through her clothes. “Daesung!” Emily exclaimed, coming over to him. “What are you doing?”

“Finding you an outfit,” he said, dismissing items so quickly Emily’s head was spinning. “Oh, here we go,” he pronounced, pulling out a pair of black jeans and a silky red blouse. “And look, you’ve even got heels!” he said excitedly, pulling out a pair of black pumps.

“Oh no, I just recovered from the last pair, and I’m not taking any more chances,” she said, shaking her head.

“How come you’ve never worn this?” Youngbae asked, taking the blouse from Daesung. “It’s stunning.”

“It was a Christmas present from my sister,” Emily said. “She had it shipped to me in Chongqing.”

“Red is a lucky color in China,” Daesung said, perusing her jewelry. He selected the diamond set and presented it to her. “Isn’t that a little flashy?” she asked, eyeing the expensive pieces.

“At least wear the earrings and one of the bracelets,” Daesung said, putting the other pieces back. “You’ll be glad you did.”

They laid the outfit on the bed and Daesung sighed. “It’s perfect,” he said, satisfied.
“Where were you when I was in high school?” Emily said wonderingly, making the boys laugh.
“Now you have no excuse,” Daesung said. “The party’s in the penthouse, cocktails start at nine. If you aren’t there by nine-thirty I’ll have no choice but to come get you myself.” He wiggled his eyebrows at her and she laughed. “Okay, I’ll be there,” she relented, “since it means that much to you.”

Daesung and Youngbae high fived each other, grinning triumphantly. “See you there!” Youngbae said, opening the door. Emily shook her head at them and they were gone. She checked her watch. Almost seven-thirty. I’d better get dressed.


******


At eight-fifty Emily was in the elevator on her way up to the penthouse. She showed her ID to the bouncer at the door and he let her in. The penthouse was already packed, people chatting and lounging on expensive furniture. She found the boys by the bar ordering drinks. “Emily!” Daesung yelled, coming to greet her. “I’m glad you came, thought I’m a little disappointed I didn’t have to steal you from your room,” he joked.

Seunghyun raised an eyebrow, but didn’t say anything. “What can we get you, Emily?” he asked. “I’ll have a strawberry lemonade,” she said, sitting down at the bar and crossing her legs.

“You sure you don’t want something stronger?” Seungri asked, receiving his drink. “Very sure,” Emily replied, “though I won’t mind a glass of champagne come midnight.”

The hours passed quickly enough, filled with dancing, karaoke and even video games. Emily impressed the entire room by performing “Bad Boy” in passable Korean, earning a standing ovation from the band themselves. “I think I cried a little,” Seungri pronounced, wiping his eyes dramatically. Emily shook her head, suddenly feeling shy.

“I didn’t know you could sing,” Jiyong said, his expression a mixture of surprise and pleasure.

“I can’t,” Emily replied. “That was just karaoke. It’s only for fun.”

“You’re better than you think,” he assured her.

“Two minutes until midnight!” someone shouted. The room was electrified as everyone turned to the large ornate clock hanging on the wall. “Your order, madam,” Daesung said, handing Emily a flute of champagne before passing some out to the others. Emily sipped it, excitement filling her as she watched the countdown. The room began counting down in Korean, Emily following along easily. “Seumul, sibgu, sibpal…

Emily glanced around at the men around her, all eagerly counting down the seconds. I’ll never forget this moment, she promised herself.

Sib, ahob, yeoldolb…

Here we go…

Se, du, hana, saehae bog manh-i bad-euseyo!

Everyone blew noisemakers and threw confetti at each other, squealing and laughing. Fireworks began to go off outside, reflected in the dark river. Emily took a large swig of her champagne just as Seungri showered her in confetti. “Happy new year!” he shouted, giving her a kiss on her cheek. “My turn!” Daesung said, following suit. He wiggled his eyebrows at Youngbae, who contented himself with kissing her hand. “Oh come on,” Daesung groaned. “Not fair!”

Seunghyun bent down and planted a brotherly kiss on the top of her head. “Happy new year,” he murmured, winking at her. They all looked at Jiyong, who had taken a step back. “Aren’t you going to wish Emily happy new year?” Youngbae asked innocently, taking a sip of his soda. Jiyong stepped up and, after a moment of indecision, kissed her cheek so lightly Emily barely felt it. “Happy new year,” he said, pulling back quickly.

Someone put on music and the dance floor was soon flooded with people. “Let’s go!” Jiyong yelled, leading the way. Emily slipped away to an empty corner of the room, content just to watch after hours of dancing. She finished her drink, set the glass down on a nearby table and sneaked to the door. She paused and looked back at the dance floor. “Happy new year, boys,” she whispered, and left the room.

Notes

Comments

Please please please continue this. I've read it three times now and it just makes me fall in love every time. It is a wonderful story. Also, please put it on AO3, its a very friendly community for writers.

Maliciouspixie5 Maliciouspixie5
11/13/19

@Maliciouspixie5
Thank you!

Oh I just love this. Beautiful story.

@k pop lover
Haha thanks, I'll try!

please update more often. caus ei reallyl ike this story

k pop lover k pop lover
8/29/18