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Finding My Way


“W-why are we going to Seoul?” I release my grip on his hand, but he holds mine sturdily. We wait at a Grand Central Station in a city in between Seoul and Buncheon. We’ve taken local trains and express trains that lead us here. It’s been hours since we’ve left school. Hours since I saw Taehyung kissing Irene.

He hasn’t released from my hand since we left. “I told you. It’s a surprise. I know you miss it too.”

We haven’t spoken about… the what happened at school, nonetheless before that when he almost kissed me. He said I changed… he’s changed.

With my vacant hand, I put a hand on his arm and forcefully pull myself out of his reach. My hands form into fists and I clench my teeth. “How do I know your not lying to me. Why should I trust you?”

I glances at me for a few seconds before coming to me with a mitigating embrace and whispers, “Because I would never do what Taehyung did to you.”

My hands soften and the memory of us at the pond last night replays in my mind.


“I worry about you 24/7. When you left school earlier today, I couldn’t stop thinking about you… and what made you run off like that. I wanted to blame Suga, but I had no reasons why. It was then when I questioned why I even cared so much about you.” Taehyung continues, waiting for a response.

“...Why you cared so much about, me?” I ask, almost too innocently. I feel my face burning hot and suddenly, it’s like I don’t need his jacket anymore. My heart rate excels rapidly and I find it hard to breathe normally.

“Why should I care or show concern for your whereabouts? Or, why I always look forward to seeing you at the pond in the mornings… why you make me feel different. Special.” Taehyung raises his hand and lifts my chin to meet him face to face.

'I… What do I say to him?' My lips part and I observe his minor detailed features on his face. Taehyung, bit by bit, moves closer to me. “That’s when I realized… I’m madly in love with you.”


“Why do you care so much about me…” I question. My eyes look possessed as light tears blind my vision.

I’m madly in love with you. Ever since we first fought… the day we had to work on a project together and you danced like a beautiful swan. It’s hard to admit but it was the first time I passionately loved playing piano for someone. The time when you helped me escape and run from people who wanted me for money. I’m entirely grateful.” Suga whispers and laughs to himself quietly. “I never realized the first time you said it, but, I really like it when you say my real name. I love it.

“Yoongi.” My hands, hesitantly wrap around his shoulders and I let myself bury my face into his chest. He rests his chin on my head and caresses my hair. I never thought… Yoongi would say anything like this. He never acted like he cared for my presence until now.

“Could that be a good enough reason as to why I want to bring you with me on a short trip?” His voice is soft. “Just for you.”

Part of me wants to doubt his words. I have to stop questioning my trust. I need to have more courage and take chances. Who better to do that with than Yoongi?

The last train ride to Seoul feels short and we arrive in the early afternoon. As we walk out of the train station my eyes light up and I take in the busy, city air. A wide smile grows on my mouth, the feeling of having and being home returns. I can feel Suga’s eyes on me. “Are you hungry? Do you want to grab a bite to eat?”

I nod, still smiling and we start walking in a direction. “Can I take you to my favorite cafe? I’d always go there with my friends after dance classes.”

“Of course. Do you still remember where it is?” He asks, open to anything I suggest.

“I never forgot.”

On the way to the cafe, we pass by my dance academy and I pause for a few minutes. Millions of memories replay in my mind and I realize how much I’ve missed being here in Seoul. I gaze at Suga, who I feel entirely grateful to for bringing me here.

“You know, if I didn’t go to Julliard, I’d want to go to the Seoul Institute of Arts. I could easily transfer from this school to there with a full scholarship. But, I lost that chance.” I heave a sigh and turn away from the entrance. “Let’s just go and eat something.”

Yoongi grins and stay silent as I reflect on the familiar places around me. When we arrive at the cafe, it’s completely remodeled. My jaw drops as I see the difference between then and now. Yoongi is just as surprised as I am. “Wow, this place has changed a lot.”

“You’ve been here before?” I blink and tilt my head. That’s right. He’s been here before. More than once.

“Yeah. I have.” Yoongi says and walks in first.

After a late lunch, he takes me somewhere I’ve never been to. “Is this a part of the surprise?”

“You can say that.” He nods and leads me through the door of a large mall.

The employees to a specific store greet Suga and I. “Good afternoon Mister and Miss Kim. Your right on time.”

Mister and Miss Kim? I raise an eyebrow at Suga, who’s chuckling to himself. He comes close to my ear and whispers, “If I said we were related, we get a discount here.”

Okay… whatever that means…

They change me into a soft, silky and long blood red dress. It wasn’t too poofy, but it did have some volume.

“This strapless heart shaped neckline suits you beautifully.” The employee gives me a smile of approval and brings me out of the dressing room. She leads me to stand on a large platform in front of three mirrors set up in different angles. My eyes are stunned at how the dress fit my bodyline perfectly… how I looked in general.

“Wow.” Suga says and I meet his gaze through the mirror. “Your gorgeous… breath-taking.”

I feel my cheeks color as I take note of the black suit he’s wearing. The black and white contrast with his suit and his collar shirt compliment him. There’s a white rose in his pocket and for moment, I can’t feel my heart beating rapidly. He smiles and goes to the register to pay for the attire. I step down the platform to prevent him from paying anything, however, two men sit me down on a chair. They lift my dress up slightly and take my sneakers off. Gently, they replace them with mahogany high heels. Yoongi comes over and helps me to my feet, thanking the gentlemen in the process. As we walk out of the store and back into the mall, I feel the eyes of almost everyone on us. My arm wraps around his and we walk upright into a salon.

It takes four ladies to style my hair and do my makeup. With my eyes, I look around the room for any signs of Suga, but I don’t succeed. Two hours past and I’m still in the same chair, facing away from the mirror, as they put some finishing touches on my hair.

“We’re finished!” My stylist smiles and turns my chair around to face the mirror. I have to blink thrice to realize that the person I see in the mirror… is me. I haven’t worn makeup since my last performance, nonetheless had my hair styled and wear expensive clothing.

My hair is wavy, thick and voluminous. I have a hairnet, non-visible in my hair which contains little circle diamonds in various places, making everything sparkle. Seconds later, Yoongi comes from behind and lifts over my head a gorgeous, but simple, round diamond necklace. I take a deep breath, overwhelmed with the number of surprises Suga’s given me today. As I touch the necklace, I turn around to face him and immediately, I notice the difference in his hair.

“You dyed it, brown.” I smile. “It’s very handsome.”

He returns my smile, looking proud and happy. “I thought it was time to change up my hair style.”

I stand up and embrace him with the biggest and tightest hug I’ve given anyone. “Thank you so much. For everything. I mean it. No one’s ever done something like this for me.”

“It’s all apart of my plan. It’s late, and I know we’ve spent the majority of our afternoon preparing for my special surprise, but trust me, it’s going to be worth it.” Yoongi guides me out of the mall and into the streets.

I’ve never felt so happy in my life. So cared about in this way. I never want it to stop. But… something feels a bit… too good to be true. What’s he hiding behind his smile…?

“You don’t mind walking to the restaurant do you?” Suga takes my arm and wraps it around his. “I want everyone to know how lucky I am to have you by my side.”

I hold in my smile and nod my head. “Alright. Where are we going?”

“I think you’ll like it a lot.” Suga guides me around the corner. “It’s not that far, a couple blocks down and we’re there.”

Something about this place is very familiar… it’s on the tip of my tongue. Where are we? Where am I?

I turn my head to the side and my eyes widen as I remember, one of the biggest performance theaters in South Korea. Seats 1000+ people… The place where I last performed. With Jungkook.

My heart starts beating faster, not out of any of Yoongi’s gestures, but out of fear. Butterflies have a civil war in my stomach. I feel cold sweat start to drip at the sides of my forehead. My grip tightens around his arm and he turns to me immediately. “Are you okay? Is something wrong?”

I shake my head. “No, I just had a thought.”

I peer down at my clothing and touch my diamond necklace once more. Don’t tell me…

“We’re here.” He says suddenly and opens the door for me to walk in first. I hesitate for moment, but he pulls me gently by the arm into the restaurant.

It hasn’t changed one bit. He walks casually to the front desk, as if he’s been here before, and talks to the hostess quietly. In the restaurant, there are few tables available. The restaurant has live violin and piano playing in the background and people talk softly amongst themselves. Suga takes my hand to a table that sits two. The same table I sat at the last time I was here.

Many eyes are on us, gossiping and commenting on our attire. He orders korean beef stew with side dishes. A huge meal for two people. Almost enough to feed a whole family.

“Why did you bring me here?” I gaze at him with eyes of fright.

“Hush.” He smiles at me warmly, unusual of him. “If I say anything, it won’t be a surprise.”

I feel my hands shaking in my lap. We sit in silence until the food arrives. A huge bowl of stew sits in the middle of us. He takes a bowl and fills it up with a ladle.

“Cha.” Suga hands me the bowl and in bow my head as I accept it and set it in front of me. However, I don’t touch anything. I put my hands back into my lap and watch him eat. As he finishes his first bowl, he wipes his mouth and reverts his eyes to my bowl. Full. “You know, I’m not letting you leave here with an empty stomach. You better eat something before everything turns cold.”

For some reason, it felt like a threat. I look down at my bowl and I feel tears nonchalantly form in my eyes. My hair falls forward, covering half of my face from Suga’s view. The bell at the front desk rings. I hold my breath letting the droplets stream, slowly, down my face.

“I can’t sit anywhere else. It has to be there.” A familiar young voice says at the front. My head shoots up and Yoongi’s eyes stick mine like glue. He takes his glass of water and briefly sips, expectant.

“I’m sorry, sir, you’ll have to sit at another table. Someone made a reservation weeks ago to sit at the table your requesting.”

Weeks ago? This was all planned out since then? I feel my eyes twitch and Suga breaks our stare, glaring at the ground for mere moments. This son of a b-

“I’m sorry. You know it’s my regular table. Please, let me speak to them, persuade them to consider switching to another table.” At that moment, I stand up and wobble. I hold the corner of the table to stabilize and find myself uncontrollably shaking. Suga stays calm and seated. All I can hear is the footsteps of that familiar voice, inching towards me. Towards Yoongi and I. What do I do… if it’s really him.

My body freezes as I hear the footsteps stop behind me and the body warmth from that person near me. That’s when I realized I was freezing cold. Both of my hands grip Suga meets eyes with him and my body stiffens. Tears overflow my eyes, dripping onto my dress and the tablecloth.



I feel a warm hand on my left shoulder and I turn my head hesitantly and glare at him with a look of desperation. “Jae.”



So, Jungkook. *SMIRK SMIRK*

I felt like he was neglected in this story, because he's rarely mentioned and only stars in the first two chapters. I thought it was time for a change. Suga... *sighs* if I had a child like him I would beat the shitttttttttttttttttttttttt- okay, restarting that sentence. Suga is the bad boy boyfriend every good girl wants, but parents hate. Luckily for Jaemi, she doesn't... have... parents... *Crickets play in the background* I don't know where I was going with that.

Suga is definitely something. Jaemi did want to take risks and be daring for once, but we all know, besides Jaemi, that's not gonna happen with URI YOONGI.

Do you really think Taehyung would let Suga take Jaemi away from him and get away with it? On top of that, let them be alone together?

And I mean, come on. Byeol is obviously going to notice Jaemi's missing... Unless, Jaemi has an inside connection in Buncheon to help cover her. Could it be Hoseok? Seokjin? Taehyung? Jimin?

Just something to think about for the next few chapters that I'm currently in the process of finishing. (That means I haven't started at all, LOL)

VOTE///COMMMENT///SUBSCRIBE if you liked this chapter and enjoy reading my writing! It's really motivating.


See you in the next chapter~~~
~Alexis Thao


I'm seriously fangirling it's just-

annabanana2427 annabanana2427

HOLY CRAP! I was shook when I saw this story was updated, I'm so happy! >.< Yayyyy lol. Love you and your stories, i re-read everything like 3 times. Nothing defeats this hehehe. The chapter is so intense! That was unexpected and i'm in love with it! THank you for updating

annabanana2427 annabanana2427



evidently it was also put up on exo fanfic ;)
additionally, this isn't the only non-exo story uploaded on exofanfic site either. but thanks for commenting

A.T. A.T.

yo just saying this is an EXO ff website not BTS

I'm so happy that you're updating. Your ffs r amazing. so much better than mine.