The journal of an Empty Soul

7.00pm, home.

I rest on my bed. Huh~it feel nice. Try to close my eyes but the thing that had happen between me and Mark keeps on replaying in my head. Okay I need to record this in my journal. This event is part of my experiment and research. I wrote all the things that had happened today. Oh yeah and I found out I didn’t think about that DUDE the whole day. Now I’m obviously thinking about Mark non-stop.

Mark…how can I describe you? The quiet and serious type of guy I guess. Not totally, right? I found him a bit cute and flirty though. Hhhhmmm..

‘I better go take my shower first.’ I said to myself.

After done showering…

‘Andria! Dinner time!’ mom called.

‘Okay!’ while grabbing my PJs and went down after that.

At the dinner table…

‘How’s school today?’ asked mom trying to make a conversation.

‘Good, met few nice people and eventually become my friends.’ I said while munching my food and smile at my mom.

‘Well, I would like to meet your friends.’ Mom smiles at me.

Her statement makes me stop eating.

‘Aaa~..i’m not sure mom.’ Gulp and blushes.

‘Are you hiding something from me Andria?’ mom becomes curious.

‘No! Mom please~. It’s just that I’m not that close with them yet. By the way where’s dad?’I explained and tried to change the topic.

‘Okay if you said so. Well your dad is still at work and he might go home pretty late today.’

‘Mom you are home quite early than usual, I guess nothing much to do today huh?’ I asked.

‘Not really, your dad decides to help me with the work because he is worried about all alone at home. He asked me to go home early.’ She explained.

I’ve got used to stay home alone since I’m 14. Mom always come and help dad at the bakery that’s own by the family. We love the bakery so much. Both of my parents work so hard to make the sales good. They spend most of their time at the bakery, creating new recipes.

I went back to my room after washing the dishes. Mom decided to watch tv while waiting for dad to come home. I lay on my bed, staring at the ceiling. I took my journal and decide to write again.
~….~ ~The Journal of an Empty Soul~

I’m spacing out right now and all I know is that I’m really looking forward for tomorrow. Though Mark gives me the chills but it makes me want to know him more. Ugh~am I really that empty and lonely? Why his presence does makes me feel warm? He really had gained my attention. …..
~….~ Mom POV

Andria, Andria, Andria my child. She seems different today. She looks happier than before. She even blushed when I demanded her explanation about not wanting me meeting her friends. I’m guessing she’s hiding something from me. Oh well, sooner or later she’ll tell me who her friends are. I’m happy she doesn’t look gloomy and depressed.

~Flashback~ 2 months back.

Sob..sob..sob

‘Andria honey! Open the door, why are you crying? Did you hurt yourself?’ I knocked on her door panicking.

The door opens widely. I quickly ran towards Andria. Lots of pictures scattered on the floor. Pictures of an idol she likes the most.

‘Honey what had happened?’ I’m curious.

‘Mom help me..please.’ she begged.

‘Help? I don’t really get it honey.’

‘Why does it hurt to love him? I feel stupid right now for loving someone that can’t give back my love. I really want to forget him. Can you help me mom?’ she confessed.

I smiled and hug her. ‘I can’t help you much dear. All I can do is supports you in any way that can make you happy.’

‘Honey, all I can say is tried to mingle with lots of people, makes friends and have a happy life.

Well perhaps in that way you can forget about him and if by any chances you are going to meet someone that might love you.’ I pat her back.

‘What if it doesn’t work?’ she doubt and stops crying.

‘You’ll never know if you didn’t try. Am I right?’ I recommended.

She nodded. ‘Okay, I’ll think about it.’

My baby needs to live her life healthily. I know she is an extremely shy girl but she need to change and starts to build healthy relationship with people.

Notes