T.O.P (BIGBANG Fanfiction)

“Oh, no. Not this song…” I muttered by myself as I heard the first part of Tonight. I was so happy. I was literally in my happiest place.
The boys were jumping like crazy on stage, greeting us and paying some fanservice. And we were honoured, of course.

But the part I loved the most was when the moving stages came into the picture and they began driving down the hallways, so even all of the fans in the back could see them by own eyes and not just through the big screens.

One of the stages moved just past us and I was again glad that we stayed in the back of our area. Through the glass floor I could see Seungri sitting down and waving at us. And Skye jumped against the gate and reached her hand towards Daesung who approached our side.
“Daesung-ah! You’re awesome! I love you so much!” she shouted loudly and I looked at her, how happy she was to be there right at that moment.

But… Although I was having fun, I also felt sad. And I couldn’t get over it. I would have liked to. But I kept thinking about the time and how many minutes there were left until the guards would push us outside of the gates and tell us to go home, so that they could clean up the venue and the idols could get some sleep.
I know they wouldn’t sleep. They would party and maybe then go to sleep but… I would just go home and cry. Some people called it after-concert depression but I didn’t know if it was the right term. I had used all my savings for this concert. All of them. And after this I wouldn’t have anything to save money for, except for school and maybe for my own apartment. But not for anything so meaningful. I knew it sounded sad that I lived for someone else who I had even nothing to do with, who did not even know who I was although I knew everything about him. Well, not everything but everything I could know, as a fan.
It didn’t just sound sad, it was sad.

I watched the next stage moving towards us. I stood on my place. People turned around to look at them, screamed at them. But not me. I just stared at the stage with a blank empty expression.
There he was. The man I couldn’t get my eyes off. And when I couldn’t see him; the man I couldn’t stop thinking about. I searched his name from the internet every day. “Why?” someone might have asked. Because I wanted to feel happy. Even for a moment. I wanted to have something I could trust to bring me joy when nothing else could. And no matter how stupid it would have sounded, he was the one who gave me the power, the energy, to move on with my life.

“Hey! Watch out! ..No! Catch it!” Skye yelled at me suddenly and then the world went black. Something had landed on my face. I was trying to figure out what it was. It was something soft and, on the other hand, sweaty. Somebody tapped me on my shoulder.
“Can I have it? Please!” I could hear a girl’s voice and once I got the piece of clothing out of my face, I looked at what had attacked me first. It was a black tank top with Taeyang’s name scribbled over it. I frowned as I stared at it in confusion and then I saw Taeyang on the stage shirtless, dancing. I guess he had just thrown it in the audience and I had happened to catch it. With my face.
“Can I?! Taeyang is my bias,” the girl yelled over the music from behind me but I just gave her a weird look, cramming the top into my handbag. The top was mine. I was the lucky one. And I had no intentions to give it to her.

And slowly I got into the right mood. I danced and I laughed. I had so much fun in the end, I didn’t have time to take a look at my watch at all. And after around a hundred songs and some chat sessions, the concert was coming to an end. But I was still smiling. And Skye was the one looking at the main stage with sad eyes, a tear rolling down her well-powdered cheek.
“I don’t want it to end, ever,” she looked at me and pouted. I shrugged.
“I guess it has to end at some point,” I said to her and looked at the guys talking. They were thanking us for the amazing show and love and support. And they said that they had to leave, no matter how they would have liked to stay. I just looked at them and nodded, with a smile on my face. I knew that they had to go. But I had had fun. More fun that I had ever imagined I could.

We let the other people walk out of the area because they were cramming and we had no rush. The venue would soon be empty and the BIGBANG members were propably right now changing their clothes and getting ready for a night club.
Skye turned to me:
“I actually have to hurry,” she looked at her phone screen and how much the time was. “My bus is leaving in a few minutes but you’ll be all right? When does your train leave?”
“Oh… Okay. It leaves in an hour,” I nodded. “Go then! Hurry up!” I laughed and pushed her to the gate.
“Okay! Bye! I’ll call you when I get home,” Skye shouted before running out of the gate and then vanishing among the others.

The speakers went on and some rattle sound came through.
“Kkh.. Hhsh…. We have something to inform you before you go.”
I wondered what the announcement was about since almost half of the crowd had already left the venue.
“I’m speaking on the behalf of Taeyang who threw his shirt in the crowd. Unfortunately, the shirt was a part of the important stage outfit line and it can not be replaced for the moment being. It would be nice if the person who has the shirt at the moment could return it to the door on the right of the exit. We will give you a concert t-shirt as an apology. Thank you.”

The shirt? Did he mean the tank top in my handbag?

Notes