New Beginnings

Today is Friday and Sunggyu has been avoiding me the whole week. Every time I see him he runs away, in class he doesn’t look in my direction and the few times I have dared to speak to him he just ignores me. I’ve gone to his department store a few times in hope of seeing him but he’s never there and I have no idea where he lives. I knew I shouldn’t have trusted him, I bet he’s the one behind this evil prank, he’s probably making up some story and hiding all the evidence.

Woohyun and I meet up in the cafeteria for lunch as we always do. Ahjumma is still in the countryside with her sister. She instructed us not to come but we’ve planned to surprise her. Her voice sounded really tired so we’ve packed some of her favorite clothes and food ready to take with us after school.

‘Anneyeong,’ Myungsoo says joining us. He brings his own food from home because he doesn’t like the food here, ‘it tastes like paper,’ he always says.

‘Oh Myungsoo-ya’, Woohyun replies while shoving rice in his mouth.

‘You’d think he hasn’t eaten in years’, I say to Myungsoo who’s also shocked with the way Woohyun is eating.

‘Yah do you know how hard it is sitting in lesson for hours, food is my reward.’ Woohyun moans.

‘Yeah we understand, we have to sit in class too,’ Myungsoo mocks and we both life. ‘Ah, my mum told me to give this to you’. He hands over a bag full of vitamins. ‘My mum noticed Ahjumma hasn’t been in the shop lately so I told her everything, she wants you to give this to her.’

‘Thank you’, I say putting the bag to the side.

‘So when are you both going? After school?’ Myungsoo asks.

‘Ne, we’re going home first to get everything and then straight to the countryside’. Woohyun replies taking food from my tray.

‘Ne, looks like I’ll have to eat and go because of someone,’ I say nudging Woohyun.

‘Ha,’ he laughs, ‘mian’. He stands up and picks up his tray, ‘I’ll be going first, I’m going to play some football before class.’

‘Football!’ I shout. ‘With the amount you just ate you're going to be sick!’

‘I’ll be fine,’ he replies and walks of.

‘He never listens,’ Myungsoo says shaking his head.

‘I know and he calls me the pabo.'
‘Ah so you won’t be able to make it to the study class on Saturday.’ Myungsoo says finishing his food. How fast do these boys eat?

‘Mian-ah, I should have told you before.’

‘It’s ok we’ll survive without you,’ Myungsoo says trying to be funny.

I look up at him an he has a big grin on his face, ‘aigoo you can’t tell jokes!’

He laughs and replies, ‘it was funny to me.’ He smiles and his dimple appears, he looks so cute my heart begins to flutter. He looks at me as I’m staring at him longer then usual. I quickly put my head down and put some kimchi in my mouth.

‘I’ll be leaving now Rachel,’ he says standing up.

‘Ye? Ah ye, I’ll see you in class,’ I smile back.

‘Ne,’ he says walking away.

I sit there alone and finish my food. I pick up the bag of vitamins Myungsoo gave and head towards the lockers. As I approach I see someone there, those broad shoulders and lean body I recognize very well, its Sunggyu. I quietly run over before he walks away.

‘Sunggyu,’ I say. He turns around like he was expecting me. Any normal person would get startled but not him.

‘What?’ He says looking annoyed.

‘Are you ok?’ I ask. Why I ask I don’t know, I regret saying those words as soon as they came out of my mouth.

He frowns and says, ‘why do you care?’

‘Who says I care? I don’t care…you just don’t seem like yourself’.

Still frowning he looks to his left and then straight back at me. ‘What do you want?’ he says rising his eyebrows. They’re so tiny I can’t help but think he looks cute with that facial expression.

I move a step towards him and look up. ‘Sunggyu you said you didn’t pull that prank and I really want to believe you but I can’t if you’re going to keep avoiding me. If this carries on I have no choice but to reveal it the public-‘.

‘Stop just stop, you’re so annoying. You just keep going on about that stupid message and poor Woohyun’, he says pulling a face. ‘And what makes you think you can threaten me?’

I’m so angry with him but at the same time embarrassed. He’s in the wrong, not me yet I feel like I should be ashamed.

‘If you were a girl in a foreign country and had a psycho who killed a dog pretending it was Woohyun then tell me how would you feel?! Of course I’m going to go on and on about it! How can I not? I can’t sleep at night; I’m so scared because I’m alone. I wake up 2/3 times to make sure no ones in my house. I sleep with a bat! So yes this is all I think about and I won’t stop until I find out who’s behind it!’

‘Why? Doesn’t Woohyun care enough to stay with you?’ Sunggyu says with a smirk.

‘He doesn’t know anything, the only person who knows is you.’

His smirk vanishes and he slowly breathes out closing his eyes. He tilts his head back and runs his fingers through his hair then looks at me. ‘Fine I’ll help you.’

‘No.’

‘No?’ He repeats.

‘No I don’t need your help. What help can I get from a man who can’t keep his promise? I’ll do this myself, I don’t need you.’ I walk over to my locker and put the vitamins inside. Before I can close it Sunggyu bangs it shut and places a hand on my shoulder turning me around so I face him.

‘What makes you think you can do this alone? You just told me how scared you are’.

‘I’d get more done then waiting for you.’ I try to push past but he blocks my way.

‘Where is this warehouse?’

I ignore him.

‘Ya! I said where is it?’

I look up at him and he relaxes his shoulders. I’m sure he sees the hurt in my eyes. ‘Look, I’ll help you. I said I would to clear my name so don’t post anything, we’ll work together like you want’.

‘Is that all you care about? Your shop?’

‘What else would I care for?’ He replies bluntly.

I'm hurt by his words, why?

---
I feel useless sitting in class; the only thing on my mind is Sunggyu’s words ‘what else would I care for?’ I know he hates me but does he really not bother about my safety? I know I would for him. His attitude really makes it hard for me to believe he’s innocent. Who else would do something like that? Who else hates me? Maybe it could be some girls jealous of Woohyun and I. I look around but no one seems like a dog murderer to me. I turn to Sunggyu who’s sitting there with his arms crossed and head tilted to the side. He looks innocent too but knowing his evil personality I can’t rule him out. To be honest he’s the only one on my list.

I rip a piece of paper from my textbook and write,

‘What’s you number?’

I hold the paper out to Sunngyu but as I guessed he doesn’t take it, I stretch over and place it on his desk. He looks down still with his arms crossed, his eyes scan the paper. Turning towards me he whispers,

‘Why would I give you my number?’

The girls in front turn around, I see Seo yeons head flinch too. Ahh I feel so embarrassed, I really hate him. To get back at him I say, ‘ok I’ll just go to you store and will ask someone there for it, what’s your store called again? Oh yeah its-’.

‘Yah!’ He says a bit too loud.

The teacher stops talking and walks up to Sunggyu. ‘What is it now?’ She asks.

‘Nothing,’ he replies.

‘So you think you can disturb my class like that and not give me a proper answer?’

‘What do you want me to say?’ He replies sitting up giving her the ‘3 second kill stare’.

She laughs, ‘I’m the teacher and you’re the student, just remember that’. He rolls his eyes and she looses her temper. ‘GET OUT OF MY CLASS NOW!’

Without a word Sunggyu stands up pushing his table out of the way, making his chair fall backwards. He walks out of class and Myungsoo leaves following Sunggyu. ‘Make sure to tell the principle everything,’ she says and Myungsoo replies, ‘of course’.

Does this happen on a regular basis? The way that happened everyone knew their positions, Sunggyu really is hard work. I would feel responsible for what happened to him but since he embarrassed me I don’t really care.

---
The lesson ends and for some reason I find myself walking to the principles office. I stand outside the door and think to myself what exactly am I doing here? I quickly turn around to walk back but at the moment the door opens, it’s Sunggyu. He looks angry but then he almost always looks angry. I’ve just realized, I haven’t seen him smile not once. He looks at me confused and then within a second his facial expression goes back to ‘I hate you all’. Why doesn’t he let his true emotions show?

‘Sunggyu,’ I say walking up to him. He stands near the principles door looking towards me.

‘What? Because I said I’d work with you, you think we’re best friends and have to link arms together.’

‘Forget it! I came because I felt sorry for you but saves me right for caring about you.’ I feel the muscles in my body tighten. Only he can drive me this insane.

I walk off towards class, he calls for me but as usual his steps are so silent I can’t hear his movements, he’s like a ghost.

‘Tomorrow we’ll go to that place.’

I stop walking and turn around, ‘what place?’

‘What other place would I want to go to with you?’

‘Ahh you mean the warehouse?’

‘Ne, so it was in a warehouse? Where?’

‘Taepyeong,’ I reply.

‘Taep...yeong,’ he repeats. The way he says it makes the hairs on my arm stand up.

‘Wae-yo? Do you know that place?’ I ask worried

‘Are you sure it’s-’.

‘Of course I’m sure,’ I snap at him. ‘Here look,’ I say taking my phone out showing him the message. ‘He furrows his eyebrows as he reads the message, his tiny eyes scanning every detail.

‘Ahh this might help, this is the number.’ I say leaning towards him pointing at the number.

He gets his finger and pushes my head out of the way then he takes a step back. ‘Don’t stand close to me,’ he says.

‘Why can’t I? You always put your face close to mine.’

I’m sure I see him blush. He looks down and gives my phone back.

‘Don’t be getting any ideas,’ he says avoiding my eyes.

‘Looks like you’re the only one imagining things to me.’ I say with a smirk, is this the icebreaker? Am I getting a glimpse of the real Sunggyu?

‘What?’ He says shocked. ‘Yah-’.

‘It’s already time for lesson! Pali lets go!’ I say running off before he could finish off his sentence.

When I reach the door to the classroom he grabs my arm. I look at him and he says, ‘we have 2 minutes, don’t worry’.

‘What is it?’

He lets go of my arm and puts his hands into his pocket. ‘The fact that they left their number is strange; they’re obviously trying to show that they are confident. I’ll get someone to to find out who it belongs too but its likely they’ve blocked any access to it’.

‘Wow you really know what you’re doing,’ I say impressed. ‘Here do you need the number?’

‘It’s fine I know it’.

‘What? Just like that you know it?’ He always manages to surprise me.

‘Of course, I’m kim Sunggyu, I can do anything’.

I smile at him.

‘What?’ He says.

‘Nothing,’ I reply, ‘you just love yourself don’t you?

‘Of course,’ he says, ‘I don’t need anyone’s love apart from my own. Who else would care for me more then I do for myself?

‘Wow you’re really wired.’ I reply shaking my head. ‘What about your parents, don’t they love you?’ He frowns and defensively replies, ‘of course.’

‘Then you do need love.’ I reply. ‘And I’m sure that love you get from them is what you want’.

I can see his uncomfortable I should have thought before I spoke, everyone here seems to have a dark past. What if he too has no parent that’s why unlike himself he’s not responsive? I quickly try to break the awkward silence.

‘Seriously though I need your number.’

He looks at me and rolls his eyes, ‘no you don’t’.

‘Believe me I don’t want it either, there’s so many boys I rather get numbers from but unfortunately I really need yours.’

He looks at me saying nothing. ‘If something happens how will I let you know? And if you find out something new how can you tell me? You don’t even acknowledge me in school no matter how hard I try.’

‘Araso araso here,’ he says giving me his business card. ‘This has my private number on it, I always carry his phone with me so I’ll get your message. But don’t think I’m your superman, I’m not going to come running if something happens.’

‘Oh of course not,’ I tease back, ‘why would you? Not like you’re a caring human or anything.’

He rolls his eyes at me again and walks off into class. I follow him and sit in my chair. He’s given me his number and I’ve spoken to him more today than I’ve ever done before, Kim Sunggyu it seems like no matter how much you’re tying to avoid me we’re just getting closer together. The fact that I’m happy about this surprises me. I’m sure I hate him. I think of Woohyun, if he found out he’d be angry and upset; I have to make sure he doesn’t find out. I don’t know what it is but there’s something about him that makes me want to know him, maybe its because he’s so intertwined with Woohyun, whatever it is it really bothers me. Whenever I’m around Sunggyu I forget everything else and he’s all I seem to focus on. How can an evil person take control of my mind like that? I need to know the real Sunggyu; I need to know what happened between him and Woohyun. Something doesn’t feel right and I can’t help to think Sunggyu isn’t the bad person he’s making out to be. Or am I making that up in my head? No surely not, why would I? It’s not like I like him…

---
It's now the end of school. I pick up my bag and make my way out. As usual a few lads say something to me assuming I don't understand them. I ignore them and carry on walking down the street.

'Why don't you say something to them? Or do you like what they're saying?' A voice behind me says. I turn and face Sunggyu.

'Are you stupid? Which women likes to hear things like that? Like you I just block them out.'


He doesn't respond. 'Why are you here anyway? Don't you have your gangster friends to pick you up?'

He looks at me scrunching his eyes, 'You mean my employees, it's their job to drive me around, something you'll never understand.'

'Good!' I shout back.

‘Admit it you’re jealous, everyone wants a life like mine.’

‘No you’re wrong. Money yes I admit it must be good to have money and to not worry about anything but to live a sad cold life like yours isn’t worth the amount of money you have.’

‘Who said my life is sad and cold? I can do whatever I want, I’m happy.’

‘Are you? Are you really happy? I might not have a lot of money but I love my life, no matter what I’ve been through or whatever I am going through I’m grateful for everyday I have.’

‘Your life is boring.’

‘Is it? You don’t even know me, you don’t know what I’ve been through, you can’t judge that’.

‘You can’t judge mine saying I have a lonely life and am not happy’.

I nod, ‘You’re right I shouldn’t judge but for someone who like you said gets whatever he wants you seem sad to me. I don’t see you around people our age. You’re always so busy and look stressed that you sleep in class; I don’t believe you sleep because you’re being rude but because you’re genuinely tired. You’re so caught up in another secret life its hard for you do adapt so you play this cold angry man. And....’ I can’t finish my sentence, I don’t know why.

‘Go on,’ he says, ‘you seem to be letting it all out, why stop now?’

I squint my eyes and say embarrassedly, ‘and I’ve…I’ve never seen you smile’.

I look up at him and he seems shocked with what I’ve just said, maybe he’s never noticed that he doesn’t smile’. I continue, 'so this is why I think you have a sad life.’

‘I have my reasons for everything,’ he replies. ‘No one my age understand that’s why I’m always around older people because they’re mature and not stupid like you.’

‘Call me stupid, call me whatever you want, be mean to me I really don’t care anymore,’ I turn around and begin to walk off.

‘Oh,’ I say turning back around ‘you being around older ‘mature’ people isn’t good for you. They’ve made you into a zombie. You should be happy, relaxing and a carefree student. Your time to be a hard working man isn’t now, its for later in your life.’

I turn back around and carry on walking down the street.

‘Tomorrow make sure to be at the warehouse for 11:00am,’ Sunggyu shouts out.

‘I can’t, I’m going with Woohyun-’.

That’s all it took, stupid me for mentioning his name. ‘I don’t care about him, you choose him or this, I’m not going to reschedule because of your stupid date.

‘Its not a date, Ahjumma-‘

‘I don’t care, I’ll see you there or not, if you’re not there then don’t think I’ll help you anymore, you decide what’s more important’. He walks off down the street. I cross the road and sit at the bus stop waiting for Woohyun. What should I do? I care for Ahjumma so much but this prank really shook me up, I can’t stay here for a year scared of walking out the house. Next time it may be worse. No matter how I see it I must go with Sunggyu.

After waiting for 5 minutes I finally see Woohyun making his way up. My bottom lip starts to quiver as I see him walking slower then usual. He’s holding his stomach and the color on his face is gone. Oh god has he had a fight? Has the person who sent the text hurt him for real this time? I run down the street really fast almost tripping up when I reach Woohyun.

‘Oh Rachael-shi are you ok?’

‘Am I ok? Are you okay?’ I ask walking around him making sure he's fine. I slowly move his hand out the way so I can see his stomach. ‘What's wrong?’ I ask.

‘Ahh I don’t feel well. I think you’re right, I really shouldn’t eat and play’. He says bending over.

‘Yah!’ I shout hitting him.

‘Ahpaaa!’ he moans trying to act cute.

‘I thought something happed to you!’

‘Something did,’ he replies with a grin.

‘Ahh chincha!’

We slowly walk up the street towards the bus stop.

‘Mian but I don’t think I’ll be able to make it tomorrow’.

When he says this I feel really relieved. I’m sad of course because I want to see Ahjumma but in such circumstances I see what’s more important and that’s staying here.

‘Its ok, you get better we’ll just go next week’.

‘Araso,’ he says smiling resting his arm on my shoulder.

‘Do you want to nurse me at home?’

‘Yah!’ I shout moving his arm of my shoulder and hitting him again.

‘Not like that,’ he laughs, ‘mian mian,’ he laughs to himself bending down. I can’t help but smile. ‘Ahh Rachel stop making me laugh, I feel more sick now’. He says sitting down.

‘Good’ I say ruffling his hair.

---
I make my way to the warehouse. I’m already running late, will Sunggyu wait for me? He doesn’t know I’m coming, I don’t know why but I’m trying to avoid texting him just yet. My stomach begins to feel funny as the taxi drives down the same haunted road. Please Sunggyu be there. I pay the driver and slowly exit the car. I hesitantly walk around the corner and the building comes in sight. I stop walking and slowly breathe out. I feel like I’m going to have one of my panic attacks. I close my eyes and reopen them. I see Sunggyu standing near the warehouse looking at his watch. It’s 10:59am and he gave me the deadline for 11:00am, thankfully I’m just on time. As I make my way down I see him stride towards his car. There are two big men next to him dressed in black, does he always travel with them? Just how important is he? I quickly run over before he can sit in the car. Anyone else would have noticed me but he seems so focused he blocks everything out; I don’t know whether I like or hate that about him.

‘Sunggyu,’ I shout as I run over blocking him from entering the car. I look down at my watch and its dot on 11:00am. Out of breath I say, ‘are you already going to leave? You said to meet at 11:00am and I’m here, on time.’

He looks at me astonished that I’m here; it really is a game to him, who will I chose, Woohyun or him. ‘You’re lucky I’m here. I wasn’t going to come, I really thought you were going to choose Woohyun.’

‘You were right, this is more important. Anyway why did you want to come here?’ I say moving away from the car.

The men in black move towards me, I flinch thinking they’re going to kidnap me. I know its mad but I still don’t fully trust Sunggyu yet.
‘Stay in the car,’ Sunggyu says to them. ‘If you find anything suspicious let me know.’

‘Ye,’ they both reply like robots bowing. Once they sit in the car Sunggyu walks towards the warehouse.

‘One minute, one minute,’ I say frowning.

‘Does it look like I have one more minute to spare?’ Sunggyu replies turning to look at me. Those eyes scare me, when I look into them I find myself following his actions. I close my eyes and open them again. He stands there in the same position looking at me.

‘Are you ready now?’ He asks raising his eyebrows.

Trying to act brave I smile back and reply, ‘yeah lets go’.

We make our way to what I assume are the doors. It all looks a little different to me. Last time not only was it dark but I was in such a shock I wasn’t able to focus on anything else. Sunggyu squeezes through the makeshift doors first and I follow. Its pitch black in here, just like last time. I feel my chest tightening. I know he’s in front of me but not seeing him brings back the nightmare.

‘Sunggyu?’ I whisper like a child.

‘What?’ He says out loud. The bravery in his voice makes me feel calm. ‘Why didn’t you tell me it was dark in here? I don’t know where to go, you go in front’ he says pushing me forward.

‘No no no!’ I moan at him. I push him back in front and hold firmly onto his shirt my face just inches away from his back.

‘What’s wrong with you? I don’t know where to go, I’m here why are you scared?’

I feel like I’m letting him down but my anger takes over. ‘Are you stupid! How can you not know that a ‘WAREHOUSE’ doesn’t have light?! You seemed to know about the warehouse when I mentioned it so why didn’t you think huh? And I’m scared; of course I’m scared the last time I came here it wasn’t exactly the best time of my life!

‘Aish chincha! You’re so useless!’ He says bitterly.

‘What? Useless! Hah you really are the worst human I have ever met,’ I snap back.

‘Really well then I guess I’m wasting my time here’. He nudges past me and walks off. I loose grip of his shirt and blindly run after him.

‘Sunggyu jam kahn mahn yo- wait a second, Sunggu-shi’.
No answer.

My arms are pulled out in front of me as I try and run safely outside. I can’t hear Sunggyu; those silent footsteps really are a killer. Something hard hits my foot and I fall to the ground. Too scared I don’t notice the pain and try to crawl out as fast as I can. I’m sure I’ve cut my arm on something as I feel a thick liquid run down my arm and onto my hand. Breathing becomes more difficult. My head spins and I’m sure I’m beginning to black out. I no longer can hear any noise nor can I feel my arms or legs. I lay on the cold dark floor alone trying to catch my breath. ‘This is it’ I think to myself. I’m going to die here, alone. A tear rolls down my cheek and my body stiffens. I’m dead.

---
Bright lights. A strong white bright light is what I see. I close my and open them again. I’m dead I really am dead.

‘Rachel?’ An unfamiliar voice calls out. I try to get up but they stop me. Everything’s blurry; I have no idea what going on.

‘Am I dead?’ I ask someone.

They laugh, ‘No you’re not dead, you’re in hospital.’

‘Hospital?’ I repeat confused.

‘Yeah, someone brought you in. They seem worried about you, they even paid for your treatment.’

Someone brought me in, Woohyun I think straight away.

‘Where are they? Can I see them?’ I ask trying to sit up.

‘Rachel please take it easy. You have a nasty cut on your arm which we had to stich and your right toe is broken.’

‘I need to see Woohyun.’

‘Woohyun? Is he the young man that brought you in?’

‘How do I know if you don’t let me see him?’ I snap back. They look at me shocked. ‘Sorry,’ I say looking down at my lap. ‘I…I just I just don’t remember anything.’

‘It’s okay,’ a nurse says rubbing my arm. ‘The person who brought you in stayed for a while until we told him your diagnosis. He then left after paying your bills.’

‘What did he look like?’

‘He was really handsome. Tall, fair skinned, small eyes and broad shoulders. He was really really handsome.’

The doctor gives the nurse a funny look and her smile quickly vanishes. Sunggyu, it was Sunggyu who brought me here. I lay my head back closing my eyes trying to remember what happened.

‘Unfortunately because you’re from abroad we can’t let you go until you have recovered 100% unless you have proof that someone has the right facilities to look after you, I’m sorry but we can’t let you go alone.’ The doctor says as she and the nurses leave.

Great great great. I want to scream! I can’t let Woohyun see me like this, he’ll be so worried and I was with Sunggyu, I can’t let him know that. I pick up my phone from the side table and dial in Sunggyu’s number.

The phone rings 3 times, ‘yeoboseyo-hello?’

‘Sunggyu? It’s Rachel.’

‘Ah Rachel, w…why are you calling?’

‘I need you to get me.’

‘Me? I can’t, call Woohyun-.’

‘No!’ I quickly blurt out. ‘Woohyun can’t know I was with you.’

‘Why? It’s not like we were on a date.’

Awkward silence.

‘Sunggyu, I can’t remember what happened. They won’t let me go unless someone picks me up. Please just get me and drop me home. They wont know where I’m staying. Please I can’t let Woohyun know, he’ll-.’

‘Araso araso, I’m coming.’

‘Chincha? Gamsahabnida!’ I shout down the phone.

---
‘Rachel?’ The doctor says opening the curtains. Sunngyu is standing behind her. I can’t help but smile. ‘Ahh so you smile when your namja chingu- boyfriend comes,’ she says smiling back.

I’m embarrassed with what she has just said but this is a great opportunity for me to get out. I look at Sunggyu and he too is in shock.

‘Of course!’ I say smiling brightly. ‘My boyfriend is here of course I’m happy.’

Sunggyu looks at me with those angry eyes still in shock. He’s about to correct me but I can’t let him.

‘Can I go now?’ I quickly ask getting off the bed.

‘Steady, be steady.’ She says holding onto my arms. ‘You can help her, its okay she’s not as fragile as before.’ The doctor says turning to Sunggyu.

I wonder how bad of a state I was in, I don’t want to look in the mirror and see how awful I look. Sunggyu hesitantly walks over. He puts one arm around my waist and with the other arm holds my shoulder.

‘Yah, how hard did you hit your head?’ He asks concerned.

I laugh, ‘just play along.’ I whisper.

Sunggyu holding me like this being caring even though I know it’s an act. Makes my heart flutter. I look up at him and see the ‘handsome’ side the nurse was talking about. I quickly look away when our eyes lock. It’s the medication I reassure myself.

‘Okay here are the paper forms, I just need you both to sign this and you're good to go.’

We both sign and say our goodbyes. ‘Ah Rachel before I forget here’s your medication. You have to take 1 tablet every 4 hours for 1 week. You also need to keep this on your foot and get it checked next month; it should be firmly healed by then. You’ll also need to get your stiches taken out after 2 weeks. I’ve written everything down. You hurt yourself quite badly so please take it easy anything little can have a big effect on you. You really can’t stay alone. I trust your boyfriend will look after you.’ She says smiling.

‘Thank you,’ I say bowing while Sunggyu holds me.

‘Ye thank you very much for looking after her.’

I laugh and he lightly squeezes my arm. We make our way out the hospital and into his car.

‘Where are your drivers?’ I ask.

‘Busy.’

‘Sunggyu what happened?’

‘Just get in the car.’ I do as he commands.

We sit in the car in silence. He holds onto his steering wheel.

‘Can you really not remember what happened,’ he asks not looking at me.

‘No,’ I reply. ‘The nurse told me you dropped me off, I was hoping you knew.’

‘I do,’ he says looking down. I haven’t seen Sunggyu like this before, what happened?

‘Sunggyu-.’

‘It was me, I did it,’ He says not making eye contact.

‘What?’

‘I did it. I took you to the warehouse and left you. You got hurt trying to come out. When I noticed you were in there longer then usual I went back in and found you.’

‘You saved me then.’ I say.

‘No I did!’ He shouts. ‘I left you, you could have died’.

‘You left me but you came back, it’s not your fault I got hurt.’

He doesn’t respond, he just shakes his head.

‘Sunggyu I’m fine.’

‘You could have been dead and it all would have been my fault.’

‘And I’m here alive because of you.’ I shout back annoyed. ‘Just take me home please,’ I say closing my eyes.

He starts the engine and begins to drive.

After a while of driving the car comes to a stop. I open my eyes to see a very big house.

‘Where am I?’ I ask but at that time my phone rings. It’s Woohyun.

‘Rachelll, Rachellll where are you?’ He sings.

‘Woohyun-shi…’

‘Rachel…? Are you ok? I came to your house but you weren’t there.’

‘I…erm I-?’

‘Rachel where are you?’ He asks firmly.

I look at Sunggyu for help but he has a poker face.

‘Woohyun I’m out-.’

‘Don’t lie to me Rachel, I had a bad feeling so I came and now I’m more scared-.’

‘Woohyun-a I’m fine. I just couldn’t hear you; the signal is very bad here. I’m with my study group.’

‘Ah,’ he laughs, ‘sorry you must think I’m weird.’

I laugh back feeling guilty, ‘no of course, its good to know someone cares for me.’

‘Of course Rachel.’ When he says this I smile, I wish he were here, I could do with one of his big hugs. ‘You’ll be tired today so I’ll come round tomorrow. I’m going to take you somewhere nice.’

‘Oooo,’ I reply laughing.

He laughs back, ‘It’s a special place to me, somewhere I used to go with my parents for vacation.’ When he says this Sunggyus head shoots up and he looks over fixated on the phone.

‘Ok I look forward to it,’ I reply.

‘Nea, take care Rachel’.

‘Nea.’

I put the phone down and look to Sunggyu. He looks out the window.

‘Did he tell you about his parents?’

‘Why do-?’

He snaps his head back at me giving me his 3 second kill stare. I nod my head, ‘he told me they passed away.’ Sunggyu looks down then back to me again.

‘Is that all he said?’

‘Ye,’ I reply back. ‘Why? Is there something else?’

‘You should ask him that,’ He says turning towards the window. ‘You lie to him too easily, how can you be going out?’

‘When did I ever say we were going out? We’re just friends.’

‘But you want to be more then friends.’

‘No, no I don’t. I mean I like him, he’s amazing but I don’t see myself in a relationship with him.’

‘He likes you.’

‘Why are you asking me all these questions? I thought you hated him? You sure care a lot about him.’

He breathes out and looks towards me, ‘just be careful’.

‘What do you care about me?’ I say forgetting he already feels guilty for what happened. His eyes weaken and he sits back looking at the house. Even his side profile is very handsome. ‘Why should I be careful?’

‘Doesn’t matter’, he replies taking his seatbelt off.

‘Tell me Sunggyu please,’ I plead. He ignores me and opens the car door.

‘Take me home,’ I say stubbornly.

‘What?’

‘Take me home I said.’

‘You heard what the doctor said, you need to be cared for.’

‘Hah and what? You’re going to look after me?’

He doesn’t reply.

‘Yeah that’s what I thought,’ I snap.

‘I was going to get-’.

Before he finishes the sentence I open the car door and get out. ‘You were going to pay someone to look after me?’ I say with disgust. ‘You can’t even clean up your own mess.’ I didn’t mean to say that I know Sunggyu already feels guilty but deep down it hurts really bad, deep down there’s part of me that blames him.

I walk off hoping on one leg.

‘Rachel,’ he calls out running after me. I ignore him and walk on. He grabs hold of my arm and faces me. ‘What are you doing? If something happens to you how can I live with myself?’ I don’t know why but when he says this I feel my heart beat faster. I get a warm feeling inside like as if he has confessed to me. He carries on his sentence. ‘I would loose everything, my store, my car, my house…’ He goes on but I can’t hear. I won’t hear. What was I expecting? That he cares for me? How stupid could I be? Why do I feel so hurt, the pain from his words is much more unbearable. I feel like the ground beneath me falling apart and I want to fall. Uncontrollably I begin to cry. He stops talking. It’s the medication I think to myself. They’re making me emotional.

‘Can you just take me home please?’ I say rubbing my tears away. ‘Don’t worry I won’t die and you can carry on living your glamorous life, you’ll have your house, car, business and whatever else you care for.’

He just stares at me not answering. ‘Okay I’ll just call a taxi,’ I say hoping away so his hand falls of my shoulder. He quickly grabs hold of me again.

‘Rachel-.’ I quickly swing around and take his hand of me.

‘Don’t touch me!’ I shout back.

Before I know it he grabs hold of my right arms and pulls me towards him. I loose balance and bump straight into his chest. He holds me firmly, tightly not letting me go. My head rests on his chest and I can’t help but feel I belong there. I feel his heart beating really fast. I close my eyes wanting to stay here. His arms are wrapped around me and his hands are squeezing my shoulders. I can feel his breath in my ear and his chest going up and down as he inhales and exhales.

‘Let go,’ I say pushing myself away but not with force, I want to stay in his arms. He squeezes me harder and doesn’t reply. I don’t fight back. I stay there in his arms. I can’t feel any pain. I feel warmth and happiness and something else but I’m not quite sure what it is…love?

Notes