Forbidden Feels
Prologue
Why do awkward things always happen to insecure, young girls that have nothing better to do than spending their days with their best friends and maybe developing some crushes on random boys? Life can be so unfair at some points, but then I need to remember that some peoples life is probably way more unfair than mine was at the moment. For a few weeks now this blonde, young male seriously cursed my heart some pain. When he was walking by my glance followed him, step by step and my heart was beating so painfully hard in my chest that I sometimes was running out of breath.
Solji was probably the only one of my friends being so close to me, that I didn't even need to tell her because she already knew what has happened to me. „You are madly in love“ she said one day as we were meeting each other at our beloved coffeeshop after class. „This can't be true“ I then said trying to act like I was unaware of my feelings. But I already knew she was right. I never really had a crush on a boy before, so at first it was very strange to feel this kind of nervous towards a person I didn't even know. Solji nipped a bit of her coffee. „You know that I'm always right with those things. So when do you think you want to tell him?“ „What?“ My eyes widened at the question of hers. „When do you want to confess your feels?“ She redrafted the sentence. „I-I don't know? Do I need too?“ The gesture of hers was easy to understand as she raised her eyebrows. „Of course you need to. Do you think Mr. Top 3 will confess to you?“
Top 3 was a term for the 3 best looking boys and girls of the senior class. And it was hard to accept the fact that my crush was the leading male of the Top 3. That made it even harder to get to know him. Top 3's never really spent time with anyone unless it was another member of the clique. „How do you even know my crush is one of the Top 3?“ I asked but I knew how she would come to know. Since we were best friends we sat together at any time she probably noticed the many times I wrote down his name in my textbook. 'Min Yoongi'
The day of the days came and it was actually the 14th February better known as Valentines Day, as I was waiting at the trainstation with a box of selfmade chocolate. Solji and I tried to make them on our own for the first time of our lives and so I really was excited on how it would be like to gift chocolate to my crush. The trainstation was filled with so many different kinds of people. There were couples sitting in some of the restaurants, families on their ways to their vacations or back home and singles like me. Hopefully Min Yoongi would come soon because I hated being in the public, but then again the trainstation was the only place outside of school I would probably meet him. I just really hoped he saw the sticky note, which I had pinned at his locker.
The time was passing by really slow. All in all I had to wait 15 minutes until a blonde-haired male appeared, dressed in the uniform of my school. He came nearer step by step and I noticed that with every step he made my heart started beating louder and louder. And as he stood there, right in front of me, my heart was about to explode. „Seo Hyerin, class 16-A, 19 years.“ I must've looked puzzled because he then added: „You wanted to talk to me?“ His eyes kept wandering all over my body and as he finally was finished he fixed my eyes. „Eh. Uhm. Yeah.“ I stuttered and felt awkward in this moment. It never happened that I was so unable to even say one proper sentence out loud. He raised one of his eyebrows maybe as a sign of boredom. „Min Yoongi. I know you barely even know me, but would you accept this present as a sign of my … love towards you?“ As I said I raised my hands which were holding the little box. It was soft pink and had the shape of a flower. I just really loved the design back then because it looked cute. And I loved cute stuff. After the words were spoken it was his turn to look all puzzled. His eyes started wandering around and I felt how he tried to avoid looking me directly in the eyes. He placed a hand on the package and slightly pushed it down. „I'm sorry Hyerin but I just can't accept this present or your love.“ Without saying anything else he turned around and left the trainstation.
The package fell onto the ground and the noise caught some peoples attention. My fingers started trembling as I tried to hide my tears. I promised myself to not cry in front of dozends of people. Someone picked up the present and gave it back to me. „He isn't worth it.“ It was the voice of a young male. A young male I knew for like half of my lifetime. Jeon Jungkook. „W-what are you doing here Jeon?“ His lips formed a soft smile. „Someone needed to look after you and I decided this person should be me.“ He opened his arms and wrapped them around my body. The sudden hug was surprising but it felt just so good to be held by a person in this moment. „Shh. It's okay Hyerin.“ „This situation was so awkward. He wasn't even able to look me in the eyes after I confessed to him.“ I felt his warm breath on my cheek and without wanting I started crying. I started crying in the middle of the trainstation but at least I was with a person I could trust.
As soon as I arrived at home I got out of my jacket and my boots. And as I put my boots into the shelf I noticed two pairs of shoes which were way too big to belong to my mother or me. „Mom? Are you home?“ No one answered. „Mom?!“Again no one answered. I opened the door to the living room but no one was inside. Before I could get into the kitchen I heard someone talking. It was a low voice belonging to a man. Moms boyfriend. Actually I need to state I wasn't really a fan of him. Maybe it was because I never had a father? My father left soon after I was born and I never had the intention of meeting him. Who would like to meet the person that left because you were born?
I knocked at the door and noticed how the man stopped talking in the middle of the sentence. „Mom?“ „Oh Darling. There you are.“ She smiled at me and I didn't know why but I had a strange feeling. „Hey Mr. Min.“ I only called him Mr. Min because I never wanted to get to know him. And Mr. Min was always enough. It was funny that his last name was the same as the one of the boy I just confessed to. Funny. Because for the whole minute I was standing right in front of the male next to Mr. Min I didn't recognise why his face seemed so familiar. „Hello Hyerin.“ The younger male then said. „T-this is a joke or? You aren't the son he always talked of or?“ Yoongis lips formed a smirk and in this moment I really wanted to slap him for his arrogant look. „Mom? What are they doing here?“ She must've noticed that something wasn't right because she dragged me out of the room, so we two could be alone.
„Hyerin-“ „What are they doing here mom. Why is even his son here?“ She stroke through her brown hair which already turned grey at some parts. „He proposed to me.“ My eyes widened and I had to control myself in order to not have a mental breakdown. „He did what?“ „He proposed to me. We are getting married. You finally get the brother you always wanted.“ Never in my lifetime I saw her this happy but I just couldn't be happy for her. The boy I loved. The boy I confessed to happened to end up being my step-brother. I just couldn't believe what I just heard, left the living room, grabbed my boots and got out of this house. Fresh air. Fresh air was everything that I needed in this moment as I felt how another emotional breakdown was near. All I could do was calling my best friend Solji.
„Solji? If you listen to this, can I please stay at yours for tonight? I need someone to talk to. Things turned out being complicated.“
Solji was probably the only one of my friends being so close to me, that I didn't even need to tell her because she already knew what has happened to me. „You are madly in love“ she said one day as we were meeting each other at our beloved coffeeshop after class. „This can't be true“ I then said trying to act like I was unaware of my feelings. But I already knew she was right. I never really had a crush on a boy before, so at first it was very strange to feel this kind of nervous towards a person I didn't even know. Solji nipped a bit of her coffee. „You know that I'm always right with those things. So when do you think you want to tell him?“ „What?“ My eyes widened at the question of hers. „When do you want to confess your feels?“ She redrafted the sentence. „I-I don't know? Do I need too?“ The gesture of hers was easy to understand as she raised her eyebrows. „Of course you need to. Do you think Mr. Top 3 will confess to you?“
Top 3 was a term for the 3 best looking boys and girls of the senior class. And it was hard to accept the fact that my crush was the leading male of the Top 3. That made it even harder to get to know him. Top 3's never really spent time with anyone unless it was another member of the clique. „How do you even know my crush is one of the Top 3?“ I asked but I knew how she would come to know. Since we were best friends we sat together at any time she probably noticed the many times I wrote down his name in my textbook. 'Min Yoongi'
The day of the days came and it was actually the 14th February better known as Valentines Day, as I was waiting at the trainstation with a box of selfmade chocolate. Solji and I tried to make them on our own for the first time of our lives and so I really was excited on how it would be like to gift chocolate to my crush. The trainstation was filled with so many different kinds of people. There were couples sitting in some of the restaurants, families on their ways to their vacations or back home and singles like me. Hopefully Min Yoongi would come soon because I hated being in the public, but then again the trainstation was the only place outside of school I would probably meet him. I just really hoped he saw the sticky note, which I had pinned at his locker.
The time was passing by really slow. All in all I had to wait 15 minutes until a blonde-haired male appeared, dressed in the uniform of my school. He came nearer step by step and I noticed that with every step he made my heart started beating louder and louder. And as he stood there, right in front of me, my heart was about to explode. „Seo Hyerin, class 16-A, 19 years.“ I must've looked puzzled because he then added: „You wanted to talk to me?“ His eyes kept wandering all over my body and as he finally was finished he fixed my eyes. „Eh. Uhm. Yeah.“ I stuttered and felt awkward in this moment. It never happened that I was so unable to even say one proper sentence out loud. He raised one of his eyebrows maybe as a sign of boredom. „Min Yoongi. I know you barely even know me, but would you accept this present as a sign of my … love towards you?“ As I said I raised my hands which were holding the little box. It was soft pink and had the shape of a flower. I just really loved the design back then because it looked cute. And I loved cute stuff. After the words were spoken it was his turn to look all puzzled. His eyes started wandering around and I felt how he tried to avoid looking me directly in the eyes. He placed a hand on the package and slightly pushed it down. „I'm sorry Hyerin but I just can't accept this present or your love.“ Without saying anything else he turned around and left the trainstation.
The package fell onto the ground and the noise caught some peoples attention. My fingers started trembling as I tried to hide my tears. I promised myself to not cry in front of dozends of people. Someone picked up the present and gave it back to me. „He isn't worth it.“ It was the voice of a young male. A young male I knew for like half of my lifetime. Jeon Jungkook. „W-what are you doing here Jeon?“ His lips formed a soft smile. „Someone needed to look after you and I decided this person should be me.“ He opened his arms and wrapped them around my body. The sudden hug was surprising but it felt just so good to be held by a person in this moment. „Shh. It's okay Hyerin.“ „This situation was so awkward. He wasn't even able to look me in the eyes after I confessed to him.“ I felt his warm breath on my cheek and without wanting I started crying. I started crying in the middle of the trainstation but at least I was with a person I could trust.
As soon as I arrived at home I got out of my jacket and my boots. And as I put my boots into the shelf I noticed two pairs of shoes which were way too big to belong to my mother or me. „Mom? Are you home?“ No one answered. „Mom?!“Again no one answered. I opened the door to the living room but no one was inside. Before I could get into the kitchen I heard someone talking. It was a low voice belonging to a man. Moms boyfriend. Actually I need to state I wasn't really a fan of him. Maybe it was because I never had a father? My father left soon after I was born and I never had the intention of meeting him. Who would like to meet the person that left because you were born?
I knocked at the door and noticed how the man stopped talking in the middle of the sentence. „Mom?“ „Oh Darling. There you are.“ She smiled at me and I didn't know why but I had a strange feeling. „Hey Mr. Min.“ I only called him Mr. Min because I never wanted to get to know him. And Mr. Min was always enough. It was funny that his last name was the same as the one of the boy I just confessed to. Funny. Because for the whole minute I was standing right in front of the male next to Mr. Min I didn't recognise why his face seemed so familiar. „Hello Hyerin.“ The younger male then said. „T-this is a joke or? You aren't the son he always talked of or?“ Yoongis lips formed a smirk and in this moment I really wanted to slap him for his arrogant look. „Mom? What are they doing here?“ She must've noticed that something wasn't right because she dragged me out of the room, so we two could be alone.
„Hyerin-“ „What are they doing here mom. Why is even his son here?“ She stroke through her brown hair which already turned grey at some parts. „He proposed to me.“ My eyes widened and I had to control myself in order to not have a mental breakdown. „He did what?“ „He proposed to me. We are getting married. You finally get the brother you always wanted.“ Never in my lifetime I saw her this happy but I just couldn't be happy for her. The boy I loved. The boy I confessed to happened to end up being my step-brother. I just couldn't believe what I just heard, left the living room, grabbed my boots and got out of this house. Fresh air. Fresh air was everything that I needed in this moment as I felt how another emotional breakdown was near. All I could do was calling my best friend Solji.
„Solji? If you listen to this, can I please stay at yours for tonight? I need someone to talk to. Things turned out being complicated.“
@Nata_sarang
Thank you for taking the time to read my fic~ ♥
I will post the first chapter later today.~ ^^
1/31/17