If You

“I don't remember this from the rehearsal,” Jiyong whispered.

“You saw the amount of fans jammed into the lobby,” Emily replied, “and I still refuse to just wade through a crowd after Seungri-”

“I agree,” Jiyong cut in, “but this feels like we're breaking in to our own wedding reception.”

They crept down the corridor until they came to a service door with a small window. Jiyong peered through it, then carefully pushed it open and led Emily into the main hallway, where Daesung was pacing anxiously in front of the ballroom entrance. “It's about time!” he exclaimed. “Where have-”

“We had to take the long way,” Emily interrupted.

“The lobby’s filled with fans,” Jiyong explained, “so we came in the back.”

“I don't care if you came in a spaceship as long as you're here,” Daesung said flatly. He opened the doors and the ballroom erupted into applause as they entered, cameras flashing from all sides. The chairs had been cleared away and tables set up around a shining dance floor, where a live band was just striking up their first number. “To the happy couple!” the singer boomed, eliciting another round of applause.

There were only about a hundred guests besides their families, so they quickly worked their way around the room to greet everyone before finally sitting at their own table. “My beautiful girl!” her dad exclaimed, giving her a kiss before sitting down again.

“I hope we didn't keep everyone waiting,” Emily replied, “but we encountered a slight situation on our way back in.”

“Fans showed up?” Youngbae asked incredulously. “I thought the location was a secret!”

“Please, you know how these things are, Youngbae,” Daesung sniffed as he took his seat.

“How'd you avoid them?” Mandie asked.

“Service entrance,” Jiyong answered. “We felt more like James Bond sneaking into a casino than a couple entering their reception.”

Everyone chuckled as the waiters came by with food and champagne in hand, and as they ate Emily glanced around the room at the guests. Many of them were unfamiliar to her, mostly actors and designers that Jiyong knew, but she saw several friends mingled in with them. Amy was laughing with a group of people near the dance floor and she raised her glass to Emily, and at an adjacent table SHINee was getting up to go dance, Jonghyun leading the way onto the floor. Everyone applauded as he started moving to the beat and Emily watched him for several moments. How lucky we all are, she thought to herself.

The next several hours blurred together into dancing and laughing and quite a bit of drinking as the party stretched into the night. The cake was a modest three-tier and covered in multicolored sprinkles, a fact that delighted everyone to no end, and Youngbae, Daesung and Seungri performed a song they had written themselves, complete with a dance routine that ended with a blast of confetti showering the audience.

Finally Jiyong stood up and offered Emily his hand. “Dance with me,” he murmured, so Emily took his hand and the dance floor emptied as they took their places. “I have a surprise for you,” he whispered in her ear. “Look.”

Emily looked up at the stage and gasped. “Is that Chanyeol?!” she exclaimed.

“He had a break in his schedule and was more than happy to come by,” Jiyong said nonchalantly. “I told him you were a huge fan of his.”

“Jiyong!”

“Relax, babe,” he said smoothly, “he's just as much a fan of your books.”

Chanyeol sat at the piano and started playing All of Me by John Legend as the lights dimmed overhead, and they started swaying to the music. “I love this song,” she murmured.

“I know,” Jiyong replied, “you cry every time you listen to Chanyeol's cover of it.”

“How-”

“I saw you once,” he admitted with a shrug. “It was kind of adorable.”

Emily laid her head on his chest and forgot about everyone else in the room until the song ended and the lights came up again. Everyone applauded as Emily wiped her eyes and hurried over to the stage. “Thank you,” she said, throwing her arms around Chanyeol's neck, “that was so special.”

“It was my honor,” he replied, “though the others were a little jealous. Kyungsoo and Minseok are both obsessed with your novels right now.”

“Make sure you take them some cake,” Emily insisted, “and let me know what they think of the books. I'd be glad to have you as my friends now that I'm living in Seoul.”

Suddenly she remembered something and she waved Seungri over. “Is the thing ready?” she asked in a low voice.

“Ready,” he confirmed, and Emily squeezed Chanyeol's arm before grabbing the microphone. “Thank you all for being here and celebrating with us,” she said in rudimentary Korean. “I'm so grateful for… each of you, but especially for my husband. We've already been through so much together, and I love him more every day.”

There was light applause and she waited for it to die down. “I've arranged a little surprise of my own,” she said as Seungri wheeled a flat screen TV onto the stage. Jiyong gave her a confused look, but she just smiled and nodded at Seungri, who pushed a button on the TV. The screen flickered on, buffered for a moment, then Seunghyun's face appeared. “Guys? Can you hear me?” he asked, peering down at them.

“Seunghyun?!” Jiyong exclaimed. “Is it really you?”

“Of course it's me,” he replied. “You didn't think I was gonna miss your wedding, did you?”

The room erupted again as Jiyong tried to speak, but he couldn't find any words. “How did you do this?” he asked, turning to Emily.

“Never mind that, go talk to him!” she said, giving him a shove.

“I'm so happy for you guys,” Seunghyun said as the room quieted again. “I always knew she liked you.”

Everyone chuckled and Emily slipped her arm through Jiyong's. “I think you knew before I did,” she teased.

Seunghyun checked his watch. “I only have a minute, but I want to make a toast,” he said, holding up a small glass. The guests held up their drinks and he cleared his throat. “Jiyong, you are one of the most talented and amazing artists I know, but more importantly you're one of my dearest friends, and I couldn't be more proud of you than I am right now. Emily, we were lucky to have you as our writer, but from the moment I sat beside you in that hallway I knew we were blessed to have your friendship too. I'm grateful that Jiyong found someone with so much love and compassion in her heart. May you both be happy, and may your love for each other continue to grow with each passing day. To Jiyong and Emily!”

“To Jiyong and Emily!” the crowd echoed, downing their drinks, and Seunghyun waved at them just before the connection ended and the screen went dark. “Good surprise?” Emily whispered.

“The best,” Jiyong said, wiping his eyes. “Thank you.”


******


Jiyong pulled his tie off and tossed it to the floor with a sigh. It was after midnight, but he felt wide awake as he stared out the window at the night sky. His mind inevitably drifted to the tour and he folded his arms. Why did I book another tour? he berated himself for the hundredth time. I should've just canceled the damn thing.

A door closed behind him and he turned around. “Feel better?” he asked.

“Much,” Emily sighed, “though I might have had a little more champagne than I realized.” She searched his face for a moment and frowned. “I wish you'd stop worrying about the tour,” she commented.

How does she do that? he wondered. Is it written on my forehead? “I just think-”

“Jiyong, this is your last tour before your enlistment, and I'm determined that you don't spend it feeling guilty,” she said firmly. “You need this.”

Jiyong sighed and took his jacket off. “Have you figured out what you're going to do while I'm gone?” he asked. “Have you gotten any more offers yet?”

“Not yet,” she admitted, “but I'm in the process of hiring an agent who can negotiate something for me, and Sagowa's hinted at another possible contract with YG.”

“Sounds about right,” Jiyong said, tossing his shirt to the floor. “I'm sure the directors will want to retain you in some capacity.”

“And I want to find an apartment once we get back,” she continued, “assuming we have enough time to look.”

“What about the house?” Jiyong exclaimed. “Don't you like it?”

“Of course!” she said quickly, “but I don't want to live there by myself. I'd rattle around that place like a pebble.”

“I guess that's fair,” he agreed, unbuttoning his shirt slowly and tossing it to the floor. He bent down and kissed her deeply, then pulled back a little. “We've got a week here before the tour leaves,” he murmured, twisting his fingers in her hair. “How would you like to spend the time?”



******


The days passed all too quickly and soon they were on a plane headed for Italy, where Emily found herself constantly looking for the other members. She hadn't realized how accustomed she was to having them around, and their absence felt like she'd left something important at home.

“Is something wrong?” Jiyong asked, looking up from his phone. “You've been looking around more than the security team.”

“Sorry, it's just… ” she felt embarrassed and didn't finish.

“What?”

“Nothing.”

“You were looking for the other members, weren't you?”

“It's just a habit,” she said defensively, but Jiyong just shook his head. “Only one week married and you're already looking for other company,” he said, giving her a mock grimace. “I didn't realize how miserable you are with only me to talk to.”

Emily punched him and he laughed. “It's okay, I do it too sometimes,” he admitted, “but don't tell them that. Daesung would never get over it.”

They made it to Milan and Emily was disappointed to find it in the middle of the worst downpour it had seen in over a decade. “I was kinda hoping for a lazy, sunny day,” she said as they headed to their hotel.

“There isn't anything lazy about Milan,” Jiyong said, “except for maybe the conversation.”

In their suite a fancy envelope was waiting on the table, addressed to Jiyong in sleek cursive. “Oh, I forgot about the this,” he said, setting his bag down and picking it up.

“What is it?” Emily asked.

“A charity banquet and fashion show,” he said, tearing the envelope open. “Sagowa thought it would be good for me to make an appearance, since I'd be in town.”

“I wish you'd take a night to rest,” she said reproachfully. “Tomorrow's your first concert and-”

“And I'll be fine,” he promised her. “Besides, it's my first chance to show you off as my wife.”

It hadn't occurred to Emily that she would have to attend social functions like this and her stomach churned. “The invitation is only addressed to you, so I can just stay here and unpack,” she said quickly.

“Oh no you don't,” he said, giving her a knowing look. “I'll call their people and have them add you to the list. I do have some pull, you know.”

“I… I don't have anything to wear,” she tried again.

“What about that black dress you wore to the rehearsal dinner? It's from Versace’s most recent collection, and no one ever went wrong with a little black dress.”

Emily desperately wanted to get out of this, but the words I don't want to go seemed too whiny. “Okay,” she sighed, “but don't abandon me to the wolves.”

“Never,” he promised.

A limo picked them up that evening and drove them to a beautiful villa just outside the city, but the rain was still coming down and Emily kept checking her hair in the window.

“Babe, you look stunning,” Jiyong said for the tenth time.

“My hair doesn't like this much humidity,” she said worriedly. “Is it frizzy?”

“No, it's perfect,” he assured her. “Try to relax, we're almost there.”

The limo finally inched its way to the front steps and a man in a sharp slicker opened the door for them. “Careful, signora,” he murmured as Emily stepped out, and he shielded both of them with an umbrella as they made their way to the door.

“Signor Kwon!” a female voice exclaimed from inside. They entered a wide foyer and the sound of rain was replaced with music as a blonde woman in an ice blue dress hurried over and bowed to them. “I'm so thrilled you could make it,” she said, kissing Jiyong on both cheeks. Her English had just enough of an accent to attract the ear, and her diamonds sparkled merrily as she turned to Emily. “And this must be your lovely new bride,” she gushed, kissing Emily as well.

“I'm… Emily,” Emily stammered awkwardly.

“You are most welcome,” the lady said. “I am Maria Giordano, and this is my humble home. Please, come this way.”

Maria led them into the dining room where dozens of guests were already sipping cocktails.

“Maria is one of the most prominent women in Milan,” Jiyong whispered to her in Korean. “I've been here a few times, for charity stuff, but the entertainment is always amazing.”

Many of the guests turned to stare at them and Emily felt intimidated, until Jiyong took her arm and she remembered herself. I'm married to a rich, talented, handsome man, she realized. I've actually got some status here.

Maria chose a group near the table and cleared her throat delicately. “Everyone, I'd like you to meet Signor Kwon Jiyong and his wife Emily,” she said brightly. “Signor Kwon is beginning his tour in Milan tomorrow and graciously made time to be with us.”

A waiter whispered in her ear and she nodded once. “Do excuse me,” she said, stepping away.

Emily glanced around the group. It consisted of three women and two men, all of them appearing to be in their late sixties, except for the woman on their right who looked no older than Emily. She too wore a black dress and some of the biggest jewels Emily had ever seen. “You're on tour?” the woman asked Jiyong. “Are you a musician?”

“I am,” he said modestly.

“What kind of music?” one of the men asked.

While Jiyong talked Emily took another look at the young woman. She's hanging off that old man's arm like a shawl, so that must be her husband, she surmised.

“I've seen the signs for your show, signor,” one of the other ladies said, “and I believe my granddaughter has purchased tickets.”

“Give me her name and I'll get her a backstage pass,” Jiyong offered.

“Ladies and gentlemen, dinner is served,” the butler called, so the guests all found their seats at the long table. “So far so good,” Jiyong whispered. “See? These things are much easier than they seem.”

The trophy wife ended up beside Emily and she summoned a charming smile. “Do you live around here?” she inquired.

“Sometimes,” the woman sniffed, “but I prefer Paris. More champagne and less wine, if you know what I mean.”

Emily had no clue what that meant, but she nodded anyway. “I'm sorry, I didn't catch your name earlier.”

“Francesca De Luca,” she said with a toss of her hair. “My husband is Ascanio De Luca, one of Milan's richest import and export men.”

She pointed at the older man from earlier, confirming Emily's theory. “How long have you been married?” she asked.

“A year,” Francesca said disinterestedly. She seemed to be trying to get Jiyong's attention, but he was talking to someone else and never looked her way.

“That's nice,” Emily said, attempting to turn Francesca's attention back to their conversation. “My husband and I got married last week.”

This mention of Jiyong made Francesca glance at her. “A week married and no honeymoon?” she commented.

“Well-”

“Ascanio and I spent a month in the Caribbean after our wedding,” she continued. “He mostly stayed on the cruise ship, but I enjoyed the islands more.”

I'm sure you did, Emily thought to herself. “We're turning the tour into a kind of extended honeymoon, since Jiyong is enlisting in a few months,” she explained. Francesca gave her a look akin to pity as the first course was cleared away and didn't speak to her again until dessert had been brought. “You know,” she said in a low voice, “I know something about absent husbands. You should get yourself someone for, you know, entertainment.” She arched an eyebrow on the last word and Emily felt a little disgusted. “Thank you for the tip,” she said politely.

“Darling, I've been eyeing your dress all evening and simply most know more about it,” trilled the woman across from her. “Is it Versace?”

“Yes,” Emily replied, silently praying the woman didn't ask her more fashion-related questions.

“A little on the nose, wearing an Italian designer to an Italian event,” the man next to her mumbled, apparently too inebriated to bother switching from English. The woman elbowed him and Emily turned to Jiyong's conversation.

“- invested in several pieces of real estate in South Korea, particularly around Seoul.”

Never thought I'd be glad to hear about real estate, Emily thought to herself.

“I think I read a little something about a new cafe opening?” Maria suggested.

“Well, I'm actually going to-”

“So what do you do?”

Emily wanted to scream, but turned around politely. “I'm a writer,” she replied.

Francesca snorted and Emily almost gave her a dirty look. “I actually met my husband through a book assignment I was given,” she added.

“Ah yes, I was wondering when we would hear about this!” Maria exclaimed. “What was the assignment?”

“To write a book about BIGBANG, something like a biography.”

“You never mentioned a book!” Maria said, looking reproachfully at Jiyong.

“Sometimes I forget about it too,” he joked, “especially since I find the writer infinitely more captivating.”

Emily blushed and Francesca snorted, but before she could comment the butler came in and announced seating for the fashion show was ready.

“That one's a piece of work,” Emily whispered to Jiyong as they left the dining room.

“She's probably just bored,” Jiyong replied, “and no wonder, since her husband's nearly seventy and put himself to sleep during dinner.”

The fashion show was in a small ballroom that had gauzy grey curtains and a low catwalk running down the middle. There were chairs and loveseats on both sides of the catwalk, and Emily and Jiyong chose a loveseat near the end as the lights went down. “How does this work?” Emily whispered.

“The outfits have been donated by top designers,” Jiyong replied in a low voice. “All of them are available to purchase, and sometimes bidding wars happen if there's a particularly hot item.”

Maria got up to give a speech and Emily slid her hand into Jiyong's. This isn't so bad, she thought to herself.

There was quite a bit of whispering going on behind them and Emily was annoyed, but before she could say anything she caught her name and strained to listen.

“... during an assignment? I can't believe someone like that would marry the help. He'll be tired of her before the year is out, mark my words.”

“I agree. It can't possibly last.”

Emily felt incensed, but she thought about the last twelve months and shoved the comments away. We've made it this far, and we'll make it through anything life throws at us, she thought confidently. She squeezed Jiyong's hand and he glanced at her. “You okay?” he whispered.

“Perfect,” she said with a smile.

Notes