The boy in front of me pressing his lips to my hand is entirely different from the boy I thought that he was. The boy I had learned that he was. This isn’t the cute and reserved guy I’d come to know and cherish over the past few months; but even so, as much as I hate to admit it…this new persona is kind of turning me on. Like the others, he has no shirt on, but he had on black pants that seem to be made of some leather like material. His hair is pushed up out of his face, and this is the first time I’ve ever seen him with a hair style other than his normal bangs in face. His eyes are rimmed in kohl eyeliner and it seems like he’s got on other kinds of makeup, all done perfectly to make him look as if he’s glowing and flawless.

And he does.

Jongin lifts his focus from our hands and looks into my eyes for the briefest moment before he lowers his gaze once more and walks away. And in that second I saw what appeared to be relief in his irises. For what reason did he seem so relieved I have no idea.

The music continues to play around us all, and it’s like Jongin is in a different place. It’s like a switch flips in him and he loses himself in the music, moving as if it is playing to fit his dancing rather than him dancing to fit it.

He had said that he liked to dance, but I just thought it was like a hobby. I though he liked to dance in the same way I liked to draw.

Shitty, but it’s a fun way to pass the time.

But no, this was everything but shitty. This was, I can’t believe I’m actually saying it, magical. I could see him expressing himself in a way that, even after only knowing him for a short while, I knew he was rarely able to do with his words.

What made the whole thing like 10 times worse were definitely his expressions. My God his facial expressions. They were borderline erotic. I pull my attention away from the boy staling hearts on the floor to look at the women at the table and gauge their reactions; each woman he locked eyes with would squirm in her spot instinctively and nearly start to drool. He was positively hypnotizing, and had I not know that his ability was teleportation, I would have assumed his magic was contained in ability to enrapture through dance.

Because fuck, was he good at capturing the room’s attention.

His eyes find mine and I’m frozen in my spot purely from the amount of emotion showing unrestrained in his beautiful eyes in this moment. Passion, sadness, lust, and others that I don’t have the chance to pinpoint. Where is the innocent Jongin that I had come to adore? How is he able to be this different person all of the sudden?

The room bursts into applause and cheers causing me to jump slightly in the Queen’s lap. I blink rapidly while trying to remember why I had suddenly zoned out. I look around at the cheering women and then to Jongin who is breathing deeply in the middle of the room after an obviously exhausting routine. He straightens and then bows at the waist. I catch is eyes once more and he looks at me almost apologetically. Why does he look so apologetic?

His expression shifts into a smirk directed at the entire room, and then he walks out as if he owns the room. Honestly after such a quality performance, he basically does. It seems as though thoughts of eating any more have been long forgotten. The room is full of the sounds of chairs scraping against the tiled floor as everyone gets up to leave the dining room.

After the show, many of the Gaia get up and pull their Charmers with them out of the room. The hungry look in their eyes despite just having eaten leads me to make assumptions about what they’re about to go do. I can only guess what the performance has done to their hormones. Even I feel affected, but despite how much it affected me I’m not going to do anything about it. At least not with any of the many Charmers around at our “disposal”. I take in a breath and internalize the feeling before pushing it away. There is no need for all of that. Now is not the time.

---

The Queen taps my shoulder signaling for to climb off of her lap. She stands and runs her thumb along my cheek before turning around to face the pale boy from before. She motions for him to come over. As soon as he stands beside her can I see how tall he is. Probably around, if not slightly taller than Jongin.

His pretty much bitchy expression doesn’t falter as the Queen talks to him, so I conclude that this is his neutral facial expression. “Sehun,” both him and I look up at the sound of her voice “this is June. She’ll be directly over you from now on. I expect you to do your job well and to not disappoint my newest guest.” Both of us tense at the Queen’s words.

“Take her to her room, and bring her back to mine in 2 hours’ time.” He nods and turns around starting to walk without checking to see if I’m following him. I bow once again for the Queen and scurry over to the male who is supposed to be leading me back to my bedroom. I follow close on his heels (trying and failing to ignore the bright marks on his bare back) and begin to feel extremely burdened by my new position and title over him as an awkward tension settles over the both of us. The walk back to my room feels extremely stretched out, quiet, and of course tense. We arrive at my bedroom door and he makes no move to either enter or leave from his spot beside it.

Is he just going to stand here until 2 hours from now? I shift over and stand in front of him awkwardly. “Do you erm…do you want to come in?” I ask. He says nothing. Okay, let’s try that again. “Follow me in.” I instruct. I open my door and walk in; he follows.

I forgot I have to use commands while in here. Make that mistake number 11 since I got here. Ha, Luhan would kill me if he knew how many times I’ve fucked up already. I plop on to my mattress while he stands straight as a statue by the door.

I blow out a raspberry before getting back up, pulling one of the chairs from the table by the door in front of my bed, and then grabbing the half-naked mute boy to force him to sit in front of me. Once he’s seated I position myself back on my bed. I sit and watch him, and he sits and stares at the ground. “Do you know Kris?” I finally ask. His eyes snap up from the ground to meet mine for the first time before he quickly diverts them.

So he does.

What a relief. This makes at least one other person I can relax around. I let out a relived sigh; I’ve got something to talk to him about then. I lean forward and lower my voice to just above a whisper. “Kris sent me.” He doesn’t react to what I’m saying, but with how still he’s sitting I know that he’s listening. “I don’t really want to be here if I’m honest. I’d much rather be back home, but they told me that they needed my help. Well they wanted my help.” I continue. He still doesn’t look up.

I hold out my hand, “I’m June.” I say even though the Queen already told him. He makes no move to shake my hand so I lower it and cough awkwardly into the rejected hand. Alright, well this is uncomfortable. “Um, well it’s nice to meet you,” what was his name? Sea hoon? Sehun?

“Sehun.” Again no reaction, but I’m pretty sure I got his name right. “I…I want my room to be a safe space. I’d like it if you’d be comfortable enough with me to look me in the eyes and just be yourself, but I’m not going to make you do that if it makes you uncomfortable. I’m not going to make you do anything if it makes you uncomfortable.”

He looks up hesitantly, and I can feel the nervousness rolling off of him in waves. He doesn’t trust me, but I wasn’t expecting him to right off the bat anyway. I offer a small smile hoping that it’s enough to comfort him. He blinks still frowning, but I push on past my own discomfort and fear that he can see every one of my weaknesses with his blank glare.

“Could I ask you a few questions about living in the castle?” he stiffens even further at the question, but nods his head after a few seconds regardless. This is good. This is progress in the right direction. I rub at my arm and try to get rid of the goosebumps that have risen from both this one-sided conversation and the cold air in the room. Maybe if we both got something to physically warm us up then we could talk a bit easier. “Can you take me to the kitchen so that we can get something warm to drink first?” he nods and stands up. “Wait a minute.” I say. We aren’t talking with him half dressed. If I’m getting cold, then I know he’s got be even worse. I don’t know why I didn’t think of getting him something to cover up with earlier.

I jog over to the walk-in closet and pray that isn’t full of doll clothes like what I’m wearing right now; I swing open the doors and am pleased to see that there are clothes in here similar to my day to day clothes at home. Jeans, shorts, regular shirts, sweaters. What a relief. I scavenge around until I find a large dark purple sweater within the long row of colored sweaters meant for me. I reach up on my toes to pull it down from its hanger. The material is soft, and not too thick to where it’ll have him sweating in the next few minutes.

I hold it up to my own body and try to compared my body to his. He is tall and broad at the shoulders. The sweater seems like a dress for me stopping mid-thigh with sleeves longer than my arms. This should be okay for him to put on I think. I drape it over my arm and scan the large closet a bit overwhelmed. How many articles of clothes are fucking in here?

Leaving with the sweater folded over my arm, I find him still in his seat looking at the ground. I stop next to his chair and hold out the sweater. He just looks at the material questionably. “It’s for you. You seem cold and uncomfortable so I figured I could give you something to wear.”

“I am not cold.” He says.

I lean down and squint as his arm which is quite obviously showing goosebumps and raised arm hair. He covers himself with his hands. I click my tongue and lean out of his personal space.

“Not cold huh?” He looks away. “Hey, I’d rather you be warm and comfortable if you’re going to have to be around me. It’s fine if you don’t want to wear it, I just thought I’d offer it.” His eyes drift back over to the clothing and wiggle it to try and tempt him. His resolve breaks faster than I anticipated. He grabs the purple sweater from my hands (making sure to not touch me I noticed) and slips it on. I look away so that he can have just a bit of privacy while he dresses.

When I look over him, I can tell that he feels way less vulnerable covered up. Now he can be warm, and the scratches on his back can be hidden from everyone’s eyes. It barely covers his entire torso, but I think it works just fine.

I smile and motion towards the door. “Lead the way, if you will.”

---

“Good evening Mistress. How may I help you?” the boy’s voice is soft. He bows at the waist and greets the both of us with a polite smile. He is shorter than Sehun and honestly he reminds me of a cat. Even with the downwards tilt of his head, I can see that his eyes are some of the most captivating eyes I have ever seen, and his eyebrows alone look like they could bench press a small car. He comes off as cute with his round face, but looking harder I can just feel that cute isn’t the only vibe that he can pull off.

Unlike the Charmers from earlier he wears a shirt, and covers it with an apron. His brown hair falls across his forehead delicately. His eyes flicker to Sehun’s sweater and widens for the briefest of moments before he redirects his eyes. Sehun moves himself slightly behind me, and I take that as the cue to talk myself.

“Is there any tea or anything warm to drink?” I ask with as little emotion as I can muster. There are other Charmers and humans bustling behind him still cleaning up after the large dinner that was basically untouched. I don’t know who I can trust here yet, and it’d be best not to come off as any different from the Gaia unless I’m certain that I won’t suffer from that person knowing.

I just hope I didn’t make the wrong choice with Sehun.

Mechanically the boy responds, “We have tea, coffee, and hot chocolate Mistress.”

From my periphery I can see Sehun perk up at the last option. “I’ll take whatever tea you have, and some hot chocolate.” He nods again before disappearing out a door in the back of the kitchen. While what is visible here in front of me is impressive, it’s smaller than I would think the royal kitchen would look like. Maybe this is just the easy access part of the kitchen, and back behind that door is where everything really happens.

I pull out a stool at the thin island that looks into this visible part of the kitchen, so that I can sit until the Charmer can return. I drag out the other so that Sehun can sit next to me. Luckily, he doesn’t need me to tell him. “So…” I drawl. “You like chocolate huh?” I turn to face him with a teasing smile.

After looking around to see that this part of the kitchen is temporarily empty, save for us he shyly murmurs, “Yes Mistress.”

Ugh. Mistress. What kind of gross title? I shake my head and scrunch my nose. “You don’t have to call me that. I don’t how they normally do things and I don’t know if that’s just what you have to call them, but I don’t want you to call me that. You can just call me June.” He gives me an odd look, but nods in response. “We’ll both go drink in my room while we talk.” I murmur quietly. I want to warm up in this chilly place, and I want him to warm up to me.

The cute Charmer comes out carrying a tray with a pot of tea, sugar, honey, a pot of hot chocolate, spoons, and two cups. He sets it on the island in front of us. “I’ll summon a human to bring your drinks up to your room, Mistress.”

“Wait.” I look around the room, and then behind me for good measure. “Are any of the Gaia around?” I ask in a low voice.

“No Mistress. They have all returned to their rooms for the evening. Usually no one goes below the third floor after dinner.” What a lovely piece of information.

“I’ll take the tray myself then. I can hold it myself, I don’t want you to have to bother anyone for such a menial task.” I take the tray in my hands. “Thank you.” I whisper. Had I looked away a second later then I might have missed the small smile that he was trying to suppress at my words. “Come on Sehun.”

He reaches for the tray to carry it himself, but I move it away from his hands. “No, I’ve got it.” He looks at me in disbelief, but I say nothing. They don’t need to do everything. I can carry a tray up some stairs.

Once back in my room, I walk directly to my bed and set down the tray. I kick off my slippers, carefully climb on the bed, and sit crisscrossed. Sehun stands in front of my bed unmoving. “Come on, take off your shoes and get up here.” I say pointing to his feet.

With less hesitation than he has had before, he slides his feet out of the shoes and sets himself in front of me. He looks in my eyes boldly with furrowed brows. Eyes guarded, I know that he is still wary of my intentions.

Which is fine. I’d be wary too.

I pour him a cup of cocoa and hand it to him. He takes it between his hands, and stares at the brown liquid while it warms his hands. It looks like he’s still kind of cold. Looking around the enormous bed I see 4 blankets stacked and folded on the other end of the mattress. After stretching across the length of it, I can grab two between my fingers and pull them over. It takes a bit of balance, but I’m able to lean across the tray and toss a blanket around Sehun’s shoulders before I wrap the other around my own.

He flushes at the action, but I don’t point it out. Figures, they aren’t even used to girls putting a damn blanket around them. Wordlessly I fix my tea and let the cup warm my hands. A content sigh leaves my mouth at the feeling. I bring the cup to my mouth and take a sip. Sehun follows. I close my eyes in satisfaction, but I know that he’s still watching me curiously.

“This is really good.” I start after reopening my eyes. He nods. “What was that guy’s name?”

“Minseok.” He says. Minseok. What a nice name.

“Does he just work in the kitchen?”

“Yes.” I hum at his confirmation. I take another sip, and we sit in silence. I pucker my lips deep in thought. If I don’t gather the courage to ask my questions, we’ll both just be sitting here awkwardly for the rest of the night…or at least until I’m supposed to go to the Queen’s room. Her fucking room.

He’s just a guy.

I don’t know why I’m so afraid to pose my questions. I subtly watch him as he takes another sip of his beverage. In the sweater, sitting cross-legged, and sipping cocoa the guy looks like a young teenager. It’s cute. He blows into his cup and even with the seductive makeup on, he just looks like an adorable child.

Fuck it, I have nothing to lose. I cough to get his attention. His eyes flick up to my face before he lowers his cup. “Okay I have had like 2000 questions plaguing me since I got to this place and I’m just going to rattle them off. You don’t have to answer them if you don’t want to because it’s your business, but feel free to answer any that you want.” I ramble. He brings his cup up to his mouth again and stares with narrowed eyes. I don’t know if he’s just preparing himself or if he’s actually just glaring at me…

I hope it’s the former.

I clear my throat. “Do you like working in the palace? Like…I know that it pretty much sucks and that a dumb question, but do you ever have times when you like being here?” He widens his eyes, and then pulls his mouth into a contemplative pout.

“Yes…sometimes.” This time my eyes widen. That was an unexpected confession.

“Do you…do you have friends here or anything?” he brings his cup back up to his mouth and nods. I want to probe him further, but I don’t want to scare the poor thing away. I have to settle for surface questions for now. Knowing that, I still end up uncontrollably running my big mouth anyway. “How long have you been working in the palace? How many others are like you and were friends with Kris? How do you know Kris?” I begin rattling off the questions that have come to mind and he watches with an amused expression. “Have you ever met another human girl?”

At that he tenses. His hands wrap harder around the cup and the amused expression vanishes. His eyes are immediately guarded again.

Okay…no talking about then. I totally blew this chance. I shift in my spot and lower my cup to the tray between us. “Um, well do you have any questions for me?” I ask cautiously. I don’t know what nerve I hit bringing up human girls, but it’s obvious that it is a sensitive subject.

When he shows no intention of asking me anything, I decide to tell him stuff myself. “Alright, well you don’t really know me enough to ask questions I guess, so I’ll just tell you a little bit about myself instead.” I say lightly. I try to smile, but his cold expression makes me stop. I swallow nervously.

“I’m uh. I’m from a uh human village. That’s where I was born. I didn’t come to the Capital until I was like 10 and I lived out in the 3rd ring. I don’t know if you know what that is, but it’s the farthest part of the Capital. The people there weren’t very nice; when I moved to the 2nd ring a few months ago I wasn’t very nice either.” I admit. With a sigh I think back to first arriving. “I still don’t think that I’m very nice. I hate your kind if I’m totally honest.” I blurt out. He straightens in surprise. “But I’m working on it…you all scare me.” I scoff out a laugh. “The fact you can use magic and I could die very easily at the hand of all of you terrifies me, but I know that you aren’t all like that.

“Kris and Luhan showed me that, and that’s why I’m here. I want to help…god this sounds so pretentious.” I roll my eyes at myself. “I want to help save you all…well to save all of us, and if you can help me in any way, or find people who can help me then that’d make this so much easier. You don’t have to like me, but I’d like it if you’d at least believe in me. I’m just trying to stop all of this from happening to Charmers and humans. It isn’t right.”

His eyes soften, and I can see him trying to find any lies within what I’ve said. “Why are you doing this? Why do you want to help us?” he asks quietly.

“I’m just…tired of people close to me dying and being hurt because of power and this fucked up social ladder. I’ve watched too many humans die at the hands of Gaia and Charmers. I’ve heard too many stories of Charmers dying and hurting because of the Gaia. Kris told me that I could help stop it. I don’t know how, but if I can do anything to help them, to help you, then I’m willing to take the risk.” I run my hand down my face after having spilled the beans to Sehun. If he ends up being untrustworthy then I have just signed my own death certificate. For some reason I just found it easy to tell to Sehun about the plan, to tell him about myself.

So dumb. Such a dumb move. The boy sits and stares at me with the same observant glare as before. I don’t know what he’s thinking, but the longer we sit here the worse I feel about having come clean.

“Okay.” He says after a while. He sets his now empty cup on the tray and leans further in so that he can keep his voice low. “I’ll help you.”

“Really?!” I ask loudly. I almost spill my tea and the entire tray onto my bed. I carefully resettle myself. His amused closed smile returns. I clear my throat again and try to adorn a blank frown. “Really?” I ask with less enthusiasm. His smile fully reaches his eyes for the first time as he nods. His expression is so adorable that I find myself embarrassed by it. I pick my cup back up and bring it to my lips so that he can’t see my now flustered expression.

We drink the rest of the drinks in a comfortable silence. Once we’re finished, he guides me to the Queen’s bedroom. We didn’t get to say much to one another in my room, but at least I know there is one other person here that I can confide in. And that’s enough for me.

Notes