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Finding My Way

The Newbie

“Good luck on getting her. Jaemi already has someone in her heart. And believe me, it’s not you.”

Jaemi’s POV

I awaken from a light pulse on my shoulder. Laying on my side, I pull my hand close to my chest. I rise slowly and rub my left eye, blinking thrice before realizing I’m not in my room. Where am I?

The room is unfamiliar, however like mine, there is a window. My head turns slightly and I take a glimpse of outside, but all I see is darkness and a faint image of the crescent moon. The sun is still down.

I shake my head and massage my temple with two fingers at each side. Closing my eyes, I attempt to retrace my memories of last night.

“Jaemi-ah.” A brisk voice hidden in the darkness catches my attention.

“H-hoseok?” I tilt my head and squint my eyes in search of a silhouette. “Is that you?”

The side of the bed sinks, making me lean towards him. I put my hands out in front of me and make of where he is. He lights a candle, revealing himself. My hands lay on his shoulder and arm. He turns his head slightly towards me and gazes at the floor. “Eo.”

I pull my hands back almost instantly, leaving my arms at my side. Hoseok places the candle on his nightstand and sits closer to me. I scoot myself back, uncomfortable with the small space in between us.

“W-what is it?” I mutter and Hoseok chuckles.

“Don’t worry I’m not going to do anything to you…” He sits in a pretzel and folds his hands in his lap. "Byeol isn’t here at the moment. She left for Seoul a couple of hours ago.”

“What time is it?” I search for a clock, however he answers without hesitation.

“4:30am. I’m sorry to wake you so early. But like I said earlier, I need a favor from you.” Hoseok’s voice deepens and the expression on his face fades to nothing. I nod my head, acknowledging him to continue. “Seokjin and Taehyung are skipping the first half of classes to help the children with breakfast and sending them off to school. You and I are going to school regularly. I made the children’s lunches, washed their uniforms and need help folding them.”

“You want me to help you?” I raise an eyebrow. Why did Byeol go? “Plus, Seokjin and Taehyung will be late for class. Wha-”

“We’ll cover for them, don’t worry. Ms. Lee adores us anyways, especially Seokjin.” Hoseok grins.

“Yes, because he’s the class president.” I heave a long sigh and drop my head. “Let me at least get ready.”

Hoseok puts a hand on my shoulder and ruffles my hair with the other. “I’m taking that as a yes.”

“I have a question, though.” I place my hands on his chest and push him back. “Why am I in here?”

“Taehyung brought you inside from the… pond? I don’t know, but I needed his help to prepare everything for the morning. The closest room to the dining hall is mine, so we laid you here. You didn’t seem to mind anyways.” Hoseok looks down and laughs. His smile fades away in an instant.

The dim light of the candle makes out a shadow under Hoseoks eyes. Almost as an instinct my hands reach out and cups his cheeks. My thumbs gently rub his under eyes. Hoseok raises his head and we make eye contact. “…You didn’t sleep?”

His hands reach up to mine and lightly pulls them down to the bed. However, he doesn’t let go of my hands, instead he joins his hands with mine. “No… You were sleeping on my bed, how else am I supposed to sleep comfortably.”

I feel his hands starting to sweat and watch his cheeks flush a light pink. A small smile grows on my face as I break our meshed hands. Leaning back until my body lays flat on the mattress, my arms spread out widely and move about the sheets on his bed. “Well I’m sorry for taking all of the space on your bed. But, thank you for letting me sleep peacefully while you guys did the hard work.”

My eyes observe the weird textures and patterns on his ceiling. Hoseok smiles and stands up. “It’s not a problem at all. We did the same thing when Byeol was gone to retrieve you.”

“Oh, I understand now. Byeol went to get another…” My eyes widen as I lift my head up to see him and he nods his head in agreement. I stand up swiftly and brush my clothes. “Let’s get started.”

Hoseok turns the lights on in his room, revealing a huge pile of clothing. He dumps the clothing on the bed and holds a shirt to me. “Their names are written on the tags on the clothes. That’s how we know which is theirs.”

After an hour or two, we finish folding the clothes and leave to place them at the children’s doors. Hoseok places the clothes in a huge rolling basket. I snatch the candle and walk out of the door, knowing he’ll follow me. Surprisingly, when he catches up to me, he doesn’t hesitate to lock our hands together. With his other hand, he pulls the basket. I feel my arm twitch as we wander the dark hallways.

“Are the others asleep?” I whisper and place clothing at the many dorm doors we walk by. The dull light from the candle blindly guides us through the empty hallways. I read the numbers listed on the doors. We’re close to my room.

“We’re done. Did you want to grab something from your room?” Hoseok asks rather loudly.

I use my shoulder to nudge him since my hands are occupied. “Hush! I don’t want to wake anyone… up.”

I stop sauntering when we hear the clicks of a door and the turn of a knob. A door, one room down from where we stand opens and a figure lazily stomps out. The closing of the door puffs out the faded light from the candle and smoke spirals up, disappearing in mid air. Hoseok and I immediate draw our hands away from each other and try to make out the shadow in front of us.

“Hyung?” A rusty voice questions and inches closer to us. “Jaemi?”

I heave a sigh and squint my eyes. “Taehyung, did we wake you?”

My body stiffens and I drop the candle as his forehead unexpectedly lands on my shoulder. “I’m tired.”

Gradually, I turn my head to Hoseok who swiftly moves and takes Taehyung into his arms. “Go ahead and get ready, or sleep, I’ll take care of him.”

My eyes finally adjust to the darkness and I walk into my room. The clock on my nightstand reads, ‘6:30am.’ I heave a long sigh and start to undress myself. “I might as well get ready now.”

After taking a shower, I open my drawers to find all of my uniforms used and in the laundry basket. I purse my lips as I take a jacket and skirt (uniform) from the pile and put them on. Under my jacket, I wear a fuzzy white sweater. The days are getting colder as time flies deeper into January.

When I walk into the dining hall, I find Taehyung and Hoseok eating, half asleep. Hoseoks eyelids flick up and down. The only thing keeping Taehyung’s head up is his arm. The palm of his hands press up against his cheek, outlining his cheekbone. Seokjin is hidden in the kitchen, however the bangs of pots and pans ring in my ears. I walk past the two, ruffling Taehyung’s hair, and check on Seokjin.

“Good morning, Seokjin.” I yawn and pat his back. “Can I help you with anything?”

Seokjin greets me with a smile and shakes his head. He hands me a tray of food. “You have to eat breakfast.”

As I munch on my porridge, I can’t help but give Seokjin glances. The bags under his eyes are distinct. His shoulders are lower than usual. However, he seems okay. Unlike Hoseok and Taehyung who are about to receive a face full of porridge.

Hoseok takes both his and my tray, placing them in one of the many dishwashers. “See you later guys. Thanks for breakfast, Jin hyung.”

“Seokjin, we’re leaving first. Thank you for the meal.” I smile and wave yawns.

Taehyung raises a hand at me before I’m out of sight. “Bye Cheonsa.”


Buncheon Metro Train- North

On the train, we sit side by side. Our shoulders touch whenever there is a bump in the tracks. Hoseok holds our bags in his lap. I find myself nonchalantly staring at him. The train breaks dramatically, causing me to lean backwards and Hoseok’s head bobs onto my shoulder. My eyes squint at him. He’s asleep.

The train continues at normal pace as he gets more comfortable. My shoulder fits perfectly between his cheekbone and jawline. He moves his head upwards so that his lips are close to my neck.

“Jaemi, you think we can just skip school and sleep?” Hoseok mutters. “I don’t think I’ll be able to stay awake in class.”

I shake my head and peer down at him. “Stop the complaining. We’re here anyways.”

The train doors open and I pull him out of the train cart. His feet stomp like elephants as we halt in front of the school doors. “Are you sure you don’t want me to carry my own bag? It’s not a big deal.”

Hoseok shakes his head and rubs his eye. “It’s fine. Let’s go to class before we’re late.”

He takes my hand and leads me in the other direction to our classroom. Just before we enter the room, he release his grip on my hands and pushes me in front of him.

“You go first. I have to talk to Ms. Lee about Taehyung and Seokjin.” Hoseok nudges me forward and walks to our professor.

I plop myself at my seat and immediately turn my head to find Suga staring at me. “Where’s the other two?”

“They’re coming later.” I hold my head with my hand and face forward, watching Hoseok. Suga’s chair screeches and my eyes revert to him. My eyes follow him as he moves his belongings and sits next to me.

“Well, that means this chair is vacant.” Suga smirks and slouches in Taehyung’s chair. I heave a sigh and ignore him. He pulls the arm that holds up my head aggressively towards him. My head flops down, creating a huge noise. Not wanting to meddle with him, I turn my head to face him, resting on my left cheek. He copies my actions and puts his head on the table. He inches closer to me and whispers, “Jungkook.

Is he teasing me? I scoff and mentally roll my eyes. “How do you even know him? You never told me. Whatever your saying to me can just be fake.”

“C’mon.” Suga shrugs. “You think I’d ever lie to you?”


Hoseok rushes over and stands me up. He sits me on my desk and examines my face. With his fingers, he gently rubs a bump on my forehead.

“Are you okay?” Hoseok questions and glares at Suga for a moment. “I heard the noise.”

“I’m fine.” I confirm, patting Hoseok’s shoulder. His eyes stay on Suga as he sits down in front of me. Before we know it, the bell rings and class starts.

“You’ve never given me the chance to tell you.” Suga whispers and cheekily scooches his chair closer to mine. “You’ll find out soon. I promise.”



Taehyung and Seokjin arrive in the classroom right before lunch break. As Taehyung walks down the classroom, Suga looks up at him, expecting a scolding. However, Taehyung brushes past him. He pulls me out of my seat and sits me in Suga’s seat. He takes my belongings and places them on my desk, sitting next to me. Immediately, Taehyung uses his desk as a pillow and sleeps. I exchange looks with Suga, who’s chuckles to himself. I scan the classroom to find the majority of the students watching my next action.

Professor Lee slams her hand on her desk, grabbing the attention of everyone. She points to the board and widens her eyes. “Mind your own business and study this information. I’m giving you a test on it in a few days.”


Buncheon Metro Train- South

“Can I ask you something, Cheonsa?” Taehyung questions.

Hoseok and Seokjin sit across from us, having their own conversation.

“Anything.” I gaze up at Taehyung.

“Who’s Jungkook?” He fiddles with his hands and looks at me with big eyes.

My mind goes blank with the sudden question. When did I ever mention Jungkook to Taehyung..? “How do you know about him?”

He bites his lower lip. “I heard you mumbling in your sleep.”

“Ahh…” How do I answer him? I heave a brief sigh and show him a smile. “He’s just… a really important person in my life. We grew up together, I mean. But he’s in Seoul and I’m here. It’s hard to keep in touch with him.”

“Do you love him?” Taehyung leans closer to me. I laugh and push him away.

“No need to be so nosy, Taehyung. Yes, I love him.” My laugh fades. “He’s the only family I have left.”

“Well… we’re your family too. You know that right?”

“Of course I do.” I ruffle Taehyung’s hair and grin.


We walk on the sidewalk, almost to the orphanage. Since school’s over, it seems that Seokjin and Taehyung have brightened up.

“Carry it for us.” Taehyung whines. “You didn’t do anything.”

“What do you mean? I folded clothes with Hoseok!” I counter and accept the three backpacks into my hands.

“We did more than you did.” Seokjin smirks and bows. “Thank you for carrying our bags.”

“Psh.” I shake my head and smile.

“Hey look!” Taehyung points an incoming car. “Byeol’s back.”

Almost jogging, we catch up with Byeol’s car as she parks it. She comes out of the car first. “Come help me unload his belongings, boys. We’ll talk soon after.”

She pops open the trunk and the three don’t hesitate to bring the luggages inside. Byeol hurries after them, carrying the last bag. I purse my lips, regripping the school bags in my hands and slowly walk down the path towards the entrance.

The car door opens, grabbing my attention. I turn around and my lips part. There’s silence between us as we lock eyes. A gust of wind blows and dust from the dirt road spirals up. It can’t be.

I drop the bags, leaving them on the floor and take a few steps forward. He closes the car door and walks towards me, stopping when we’re only a few meters away from each other.





I know I haven't updated in such a long time (20+ days). But summer got me busy. Surprisingly more busy than the school year. I also have lost my motivation to write in general and am lazy from other activities I'm doing. WILL UPDATE ASAP.

JIMIN is introduced, well at the end. The question is, how do they know each other? HMMMM. Find out in my next chapter... when I'm finished writing it, lmao. THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR READING. I'm sorry if you literally gave up on me as a writer, lol, I would too if I were you.

VOTE///COMMENT///SUBSCRIBE to hear more from me. AND I PROMISE to update more often than not. <3 you all

See you in the next chapter~!
~Alexis Thao

P.S. JUST updated my profile bio thingy. CHECK IT OUT if you want to.




I'm seriously fangirling it's just-

annabanana2427 annabanana2427

HOLY CRAP! I was shook when I saw this story was updated, I'm so happy! >.< Yayyyy lol. Love you and your stories, i re-read everything like 3 times. Nothing defeats this hehehe. The chapter is so intense! That was unexpected and i'm in love with it! THank you for updating

annabanana2427 annabanana2427



evidently it was also put up on exo fanfic ;)
additionally, this isn't the only non-exo story uploaded on exofanfic site either. but thanks for commenting

A.T. A.T.

yo just saying this is an EXO ff website not BTS

I'm so happy that you're updating. Your ffs r amazing. so much better than mine.