Remembering Elizabeth (Featuring Suho and Sehun)

“What are you doing?” asked Sehun.
“I have to call an ambulance. She needs to go to the hospital,” said Suho as he began to dial.
Sehun grabbed the phone out of Suho’s hands. “No!”
“Sehun, we have to. Look at her. She’s beyond our help now.” Suho started to cry.
“She’s just drunk. When she sobers up she’s going to be fine,” he said and moved away from Suho.
Baekhyun sat down on the couch.
“Sehun. Give me the phone.” Suho held out his hand.
“No I said! She’s not going. I’ll take care of her. Junie, they tried to take her away from us last time,” said Sehun.
“I know. Maybe that’s what she needs though, Sehun. We haven’t done a very good job of taking care of her.” Suho looked at me crouched in the corner and began to cry harder. He put his hands over his face and shook his head. “I don’t know what else to do. I’ve tried so hard. They told me how hard it was going to be but I didn’t listen. I thought if we loved her and protected her she would heal and be fine. I was wrong. Now we’ve lost her and it’s all my fault.” He went to his knees. Sehun knelt beside him and put his arms around him.
“We haven’t lost her Junie. I really think that when she sobers up she’ll be fine. You’ve done an awesome job. Who knows what would have happened to her if you hadn’t gone to get her. Remember how bad you told me that state house was?”
Suho nodded and continued to cry on Sehun’s shoulder.
“You saved her from that. She’s going to get better. WE are going to see to it. Not them. She’s another case to them but she’s our family. We don’t give up on family. Remember?” asked Sehun.
Suho nodded again. He pulled away from Sehun and wiped his eyes. He sniffled. “Look at her Sehun. She doesn’t even know who we are.” He turned to look at Baekhyun. “What did she call you?”
“Kyung,” he said.
“Who’s Kyung? Do you think that was her kidnapper?” asked Suho and looked at Sehun.
“I do. Do you think if we ask her that she’ll give us his whole name?” asked Sehun.
“I guess we could try. We need to get her out of that corner and to her bed. She can’t stay there all night.” He turned back to Baekhyun. “And tomorrow, we are going to have a serious talk.”
“I figured,” said Baekhyun.
“Go to bed. NOW!” yelled Suho.
Baekhyun got up and left the room.
Sehun came over to kneel in front of me. “Elizabeth? Do you know me?” he asked.
I looked at him but all I could see was Kyung. “I’m sorry.”
“For what sweetheart?”
“For being bad. I’ll be good from now on. I promise.” I moved farther into the corner.
“You weren’t bad. I just want to take you to your bed so you can rest. Will you come with me?” Sehun held out his hand.
“Do I have to wear the chain?”
“What chain?”
“My ankle chain. Can I please go without it tonight? I won’t try to leave. I promise. I wouldn’t go out in this snow storm. I would die.”
Sehun looked at Suho and then back to me. “No. No chain. Ever again.”
“Are you going to whip me again?” I asked.
“What? No. I’ve never done that and I would never do that to you. Who did that to you?”
I was confused. Maybe Kyung didn’t remember. As I looked at him, his face began to look a little like Sehun’s. “Can I please just sleep tonight? I feel strange and I’m so tired.”
“Elizabeth? Do you know who I am?” asked Sehun.
“Kyung,” I said.
“Kyung who?” he asked.
“Are you trying to trick me?” I asked.
“No. I wouldn’t do that. What’s my name Elizabeth? My whole name?”
I looked at him closer and I realized it really was Sehun. Unless Kyung was trying to trick me so that he could punish me. But he really looked like Sehun.
“Are you Oh Sehun?” I asked.
He smiled a sad smile. “Yes. I’m Oh Sehun. Now will you come with me?” He held out his hand again.
I knew it could be a trick but I was so tired. I put my hand in his and he helped me to stand up. He leaned over and picked me up and turned to Suho. “I’ll take care of her tonight. You go ahead and go to bed and don’t worry. She’s going to be fine. See? She already knows who I am.” He started for the door. “Goodnight Junie.”
I watched Sehun’s face as he carried me to my room. It kept changing from Sehun to Kyung and back again. I was so confused and scared and I didn’t know what was real.
“Sehun?”
“Yes?” He adjusted his grip on me as he climbed the stairs.
“Did I do something bad?” I asked.
“No, you didn’t do anything bad,” he said.
“I think you were angry with me for something.”
“I was wrong. I’m not angry with you and I never should have been.”
We entered my room and Sehun laid me in my bed. He took off my shoes and tucked me in, pushing my hair away from my face and leaning over to put a kiss on my temple. He sat on the edge of the bed. “Elizabeth? Do you know me?”
“You’re Sehun,” I said.
“That’s right. Who’s Kyung?” He continued to run his fingers through my hair.
I thought about his question. I finally remembered. “He’s the one who owns me. He said he owns my body and now he wants the rest of me. He knows where I am and he’s coming to get me. I don’t want to go with him, Sehun.”
The look on Sehun’s face was barely contained rage. “Listen to me very carefully. He’s not coming to get you. That was a lie. All of that was lies. He doesn’t own you. No one owns you but you. Alright? I won’t ever let him come anywhere near you again. Never again! Do you know his whole name, Elizabeth?” He stuck his tongue in the corner of his mouth as he looked at me and his breathing became labored.
“I can’t remember,” I lied. I was afraid that if Sehun went to find Park Kyung that something bad would either happen to him or to me and I wasn’t willing to take that chance. “I’m sorry.”
“It’s fine. It’s alright. Go to sleep sweet girl.” He kissed my cheek.
It was a very bad night for me and Sehun. I spent the night running from Park Kyung and Sehun spent the night bringing me back to my senses.

When I finally woke up the next afternoon, it was to a terrible racket down the hall. I ran out and stood in the hallway to find out where the noise was coming from when I saw Suho coming toward me. He turned into a doorway before he got to me and I heard him yell, “What do you two think you are doing? This isn’t going to solve anything!”
I ran down there to see what was going on when I heard a loud crash and Sehun said, “I’m not trying to solve anything! I’m just going to kick his ass!”
I looked into the room and it was a mess. Bacon was on one side of a table trying to stay away from Sehun who was on the other side trying to reach across and grab him. “Jun, tell him I didn’t know about him and Elizabeth! He won’t believe me. If I had known I would have backed off.” He jumped backwards as Sehun’s hand got close.
“Jun, tell him I don’t give a damn if he knew or not! He took her out and got her drunk against the rules and almost destroyed her! Not only that but he tried to rape her on the pool table!”
“OH COME ON! I did NOT try to RAPE her! For God’s sake! I barely remember anything about last night. I was drunk, Jun! You know I would never hurt that girl!”
Sehun faked a left and caught up with Bacon. His fist made a loud smacking sound as it smashed into Bacon’s face and Bacon went flying to the floor. Sehun advanced on him as he crawled backwards. Suho went in and got between them but Sehun pushed Suho to the side and he barely kept his balance. “Sorry, Junie. Stay out of this one.” Bacon tried to get up and Sehun grabbed the back of his shirt. He put an arm around his neck and pulled him backwards and up off of his feet. He punched him in the side.
“That’s enough, Sehun!” yelled Suho as he tried to pull them apart. “You don’t really want to hurt Baekhyun. He’s your brother!”
“Hell if I don’t!” He put Bacon down and spun him around but Bacon was ready for him. He uppercut Sehun in the stomach and knocked the wind out of him. Sehun bent over and held his stomach but he never took his eyes off of Bacon. When Bacon came in for another punch, Sehun stood up and grabbed his brother by the throat.
I couldn’t watch any more. I ran in and, moving between the boys, I wrapped my arms around Sehun. “Please stop. Please. Let him go, Sehun. For me.”
Sehun looked down at me and let go of Bacon. His face was full of wrath. “He isn’t my brother. He’s nothing.” He unwrapped my arms from his waist and left the room.
I went over and hugged Bacon. “I’m so sorry. This is all my fault. He doesn’t mean it. He loves you really. I’m the cause of all of this.” I hugged Suho and said, “I’m sorry I messed up your family. I’m so sorry.” I ran from the room to find Sehun and I started to cry.
I caught up with Sehun going down the stairs. “Sehun! Wait!”
He stopped but he didn’t turn around.
“Where are you going?” I asked as I caught up with him and stood in front of him on the stairs. I was still crying.
He wiped away my tears with his thumb and held my face in his hand. “Don’t cry. Everything’s alright. I was just mad. I hate when you cry.”
“Please don’t hate Bacon. He really didn’t know about us and it was my fault. I was supposed to tell him and I chickened out because I didn’t want to hurt him. I shouldn’t have gotten drunk. I was upset because we fought and I made a stupid decision but it wasn’t Bacon’s fault. It was mine. He is your brother, Sehun. Please don’t let me mess up your family.” I started to cry harder.
“Come with me.” Sehun took my hand and continued down the stairs. We went into the kitchen where he grabbed a few things and then he led me to the sunroom. “Sit down.” He pulled out a chair for me.
I watched as he sat down and poured some crackers onto a plate. He began smearing peanut butter on them and putting them onto a plate in front of me. “Eat these. They will soak up any alcohol that’s left over and settle your stomach. I know you have to feel awful.”
I did. In every way possible.
He poured a glass of milk for me to drink. “Eat it slowly or you’ll be sick.” He leaned an elbow way out on the table and rested his head in his hand as he watched me eat. “It isn’t your fault. None of it. It’s mine.” I started to protest when he closed his eyes and shook his head. “Shhh. Don’t argue with me. I’ve made so many mistakes. I took advantage of you when you were so vulnerable. I kept it a secret. I didn’t say anything to Baekhyun when I saw him getting closer to you. I didn’t watch over you closely enough.” He paused and closed his eyes again. “I don’t even blame Baekhyun. I know he didn’t know but he still needed his ass kicked. He wants to treat you like nothing happened to you but we can’t do that. Something horrible happened to you and as you remember it, it is happening to you again. I wish you never had to remember it but if you don’t, you won’t heal. It would always be a possibility of it coming back to you in the future and you couldn’t have any kind of normal future with that hanging over your head.”
“Please don’t blame yourself, Sehun. I never should have come here. Suho should have sent me to the hospital and never thought of me again. I’m not his or anyone’s responsibility. I got myself kidnapped so everything that happened after that was my problem. Not Suho’s and definitely not yours.” I took a bite of a cracker. He was right. It was making me feel better.
“No. Junie doesn’t work that way…. Wait! You remember being kidnapped?” Sehun sat up straight.
I thought about it. “I guess I do. I was lost and this man offered to take me to the restaurant where I was supposed to meet my family. Instead, he took me to his apartment and I followed him blindly. I trusted him until he locked the door with that damn little gold key he wore around his neck and then he never let me go.”
Sehun’s eyes were huge. I jumped back a little when I looked up at him. “Go on,” he said.
“With what?” I asked and nibbled the cracker.
“With what you were saying. What happened after he locked the door?”
“Who?” I was thoroughly confused.
“You were just telling me about the man who kidnapped you,” he said.
“I was? What did I say?”
Sehun just looked at me. His mouth became a straight line as he tried to decide where to go from there. “Never mind,” he said finally.
“Will you go and apologize to Bacon? Please?” I asked.
“No way! He deserved what he got. Junie ought to finish what I started. He won’t but he should.”
At that moment I knew what I had to do. I couldn’t come between these men. They were family and I was an intruder causing nothing but trouble. It was going to be the hardest thing I’ve ever done but I knew I had to. They were too important to me. I had to leave. As I looked at Sehun looking at me, I didn’t know where I was going to go. The only place I could think of was the hospital. I couldn’t go there because Suho would just come and get me. I needed to disappear. I could go back to America with my family but I would just become a burden on them and they were complete strangers.
Sehun reached out and held my hand on the table. “Is it that important to you for us to get along?” he asked.
I nodded. I was afraid if I spoke, I might say what was going through my mind. That would be disastrous because for a short moment, I thought about going back to Kyung. I was sure he would take me back even though Tom had made him get rid of me. I wouldn’t be a burden to him but I would probably end up dead. I wasn’t even sure how to find him. I did belong to him after all. Maybe if I was really good and did everything he wanted, he would treat me good. I might be saving another girl from suffering my fate at the same time because if he had me, he wouldn’t need anyone else.
“Don’t worry about us. We never stay mad long. We’ve fought before, worse than this actually, and we always make up. It just takes a while. We both have fiery tempers so we fight a lot. You’re right. He’s my brother and I love him. He just needs to learn to think.” Sehun looked at our hands as he rubbed the back of mine with his thumb.
I looked at Sehun and thought of how good and sweet he was and how messed up Kyung was and I could feel the tears beginning to well up behind my eyes. I was also messed up and I belonged with Kyung. Not this beautiful man with a beautiful heart that I would eventually make as messed up as I was. I had to do it. As much as I hated to, I had to go back to Kyung. It was where I belonged. It was the only place where I couldn’t hurt the ones I loved the most and they wouldn’t be able to find me. I stood up and went to stand between Sehun’s legs. He looked up at me with the most innocent little puppy face and I couldn’t hold back the tears. I leaned over and gently kissed his mouth, knowing that it would be the last time, and I ran from the room.

I went to my room and shut and locked the door. I carefully picked an outfit to wear, knowing that it was the last thing I would wear for a while. I went to have a shower and made sure to take special care with fixing my hair. I wanted the boys last image of me to be a good one. I had decided during the shower that my best course of action would be to get Suho’s car to take me to the middle of town and then I would take the bus to the diner where I had seen Kyung walking around. It was near the restaurant so he had to live somewhere near there. If he didn’t take me back, then I would go to the hospital and ask them not to call Suho.
I sat down to write a letter to each of my boys. They had to know that nothing was their fault and that this is the best thing for everyone. I was shaking as I picked up the pen. I thought of being locked in that little bedroom and being chained to the bed. I thought of the poisoned food and the eerie blue light. I became too terrified to move for a second. Calm down Elizabeth. If you are good and give Kyung what he wants, nothing will happen to you. He just wants to rule you and have you do his bidding. You can do that. He might even let you roam the apartment like before.
I didn’t know where all of these memories were coming from all of a sudden. Maybe the alcohol opened up the closed off parts of my brain. I realized that tears had started pouring from me when I heard a knock on the door. I wiped my eyes with my sleeves and got up to answer it. It was Suho.
“Elizabeth, are you alright? Sehun said you seemed upset when you left him and he wanted me to check on you.”
I smiled at him. I was going to miss his sweet face and for a moment I just stared at him, not wanting to let his image go.
“Elizabeth?”
“I’m okay, Suho. I just feel bad for causing so much trouble,” I said.
“How many times do…”
I interrupted him. “I know you say it isn’t my fault but it is. Those two boys wouldn’t be fighting if it weren’t for me.”
“Yes they would. They fight all of the time. Of all my boys, they are the two I have to watch the most.” To himself he muttered, “Well, now I have Yixing but that’s a different story.” He looked at me and smiled. “So I want you to put it out of your head that this has anything to do with you. This is a competition for dominance between two men. A lot of that goes on in Exo.”
I put my arms around Suho and hugged him as if I was never going to let him go. I didn’t want to. I wanted to stay with him forever. But I cared too much for him to stay here and break up his family. “I love you, Suho. Thank you for taking care of me,” I said as I squeezed him tighter.
“I love you too, Elizabeth and I love taking care of you. I always will.”
I finally let go and stepped back but he grabbed my hand. “So, you are alright then?”
“Yes, I’m okay.”
“Good. I have to go out. Baekhyun has gone to see a friend and Sehun has another therapy session. Lay down and get some rest and we’ll be back soon. I want all of us to spend some time together tonight.,” said Suho.
I laid my hands on his cheeks and and gave him an innocent kiss on his mouth. It was the last time I would ever see him and I wanted it to be special.
His face looked surprised but he quickly hit it with a smile. “If you keep that up, those boys are both going to have to fight me!”
We laughed.
When Suho left, I went to find Bacon but he was already gone. I was sad but then I thought, It’s only fitting that Suho is the last one I will see since he was the first one I saw. I thought back to that day at the airport when my mind was all but a blank and I thought I was in China and going to Amsterdam. I didn’t even know where Amsterdam was. I still don’t. I thought of all the things that had happened since that day. “It’s been a great adventure but now I guess it’s time to go home,” I said to the empty room.
I went back to my room to finish my letters. I wanted to be gone before any of them got back. I looked around my room. My princess room. I went over and ran my hand over the back of the couch where Sehun had slept. I thought of him half on and half off of the tiny sofa, with his face pressed into the hard little pillow. I thought of him turning over and giving me a peep show of his sexy stomach. My mind wandered to Sehun pressing me against the pool wall and of all of the things we did there. I had to shake my head to come back to my senses.
Going to the desk, I put each of the letters into their own envelopes and sealed each with a kiss. I looked around to see if I had forgotten anything. I knew it could be a while before I found Kyung so I decided to pack a few things to take with me. I didn’t think Suho would begrudge me that. What was he going to do with these clothes anyway except donate them? I went to the closet to get a bag and when I opened the doors, I was faced with the big beautiful ball gown that I would never get to wear. I walked into it and wrapped it’s fluttery ruffles around me. I touched one of the shiny sequins and thought, I was almost a princess. I rubbed the soft silk against my cheek and closed my eyes. I imagined dancing with each of my boys and ending the night with a kiss from my prince, Sehun. I reluctantly let go of the gorgeous red silk and all of the dreams that went with it.
I found the bag I was searching for and, taking one last longing look at the dress, I closed that door forever. I packed the bag and went to each of the boys rooms to leave the letters on their beds. As I sat each one down, I thought of how hurt they would be and how they would probably grow to hate me. But that was okay. Most likely I would be dead by then and I would never have to know about it. Also, they would be together and happy and not have to worry about the sad crazy girl that they had once saved.
When I got to Sehun’s room, I couldn’t resist laying on his bed and pushing my face into his pillow. I breathed in his scent. I wanted to take it with me but that wouldn’t work. I took the pillowcase instead and stuffed it into my bag. I laid down and closed my eyes and cried for a few minutes. Then I sat up and stopped. I made a promise to myself that those were the last tears I would shed over this. They only made it harder to leave.
I went down to the garage and found one of the drivers who agreed to take me downtown. He didn’t talk to me and I didn’t talk to him except to say “Thank you” when he dropped me off. Of course, he thought he was waiting for me and I didn’t tell him any different. It would give me a good head start. I went around the corner and sat on the bus bench. I checked the schedule and I would only have to wait ten minutes. Sitting there, I became paranoid that on of the boys would see me so I put my hood up.
The bus finally came and I found a seat to myself. When I got to the diner, I stepped off of the bus and into my new life. In all actuality, I may have been signing my own death warrant. It would definitely be a life of bondage and slavery but I felt like it was where I belonged. The world I had been living in, Suho’s world, had seemed like a beautiful dream. It never felt quite real and I was often afraid I was going to wake up to find out it had never happened at all. That would break my heart. Suho, Sehun, and Bacon had all been too good for me. Kyung was right. I belonged to him. I was corrupted and defiled and even if it had been by Kyung, it was still a fact. That was why things had gone wrong between my boys. I was like a black spot in their pretty white world and anything I touched was going to become dirty like me.
I didn’t know if I should stay in one place or walk around. I went into the diner and ordered a soda. I sat in a booth beside the window and just watched the people pass outside. After a few minutes, a girl came over and asked if I wanted anything to eat. At first I said no but then I thought about it and ordered fries. When she brought the fries over, she stood there looking at me for a second. Then she asked, “Aren’t you that missing American girl that freaked out in here a while back?”
“No. I get that all the time. I must look exactly like her,” I lied.
“You really do. We could have sworn you were her. She was hard to forget. Not only was she completely whacked out but she was in here with Sehun from Exo! Anyway, sorry. Enjoy the fries.” She went back behind the counter and I continued to look for Kyung.
About fifteen minutes and twenty fries later, I had a close call. Suho’s car drove by the diner and, not thinking, I looked for him sitting in the back seat. He looked up and his eyes met mine. I could see his face change from calm to alarmed. I watched for a second as he sat up and spoke to the driver. Oh no! No, no, no no!” I hurried out of the diner and began walking in the opposite direction of Suho’s car. I crossed the road and ducked into a tiny alleyway and leaned against the wall with my eyes closed. I was breathing hard more from fear than from exertion.
I dared a peek around the corner and I saw Suho run into the diner. I watched as he ran through it and then to the counter. I knew he was asking about me. I hoped that they hadn’t seen where I had gone when I left. Well, I guess now they know I lied. He came out and looked up and down the street and then he sat on the bench in front of the diner and looked around for a few minutes. He rubbed his head as if he had a headache and then walked back to his car and got in. I watched as it drove away and then I leaned back against the wall. I wanted to cry but I had made a promise and I meant to keep it.
It took a while before I felt safe coming out but I finally did and I decided to walk around a little. I started to wonder if this whole thing had been a bad idea when I saw him. It was Kyung. He was different than I remembered but it was definitely him. I don’t know if I expected someone terrifying or demon-like. He was standing there buying food from a street vendor as normal as could be. He was wearing jeans, tennis shoes, and a hoodie. What had I expected? Horns and a whip? I took a deep breath and forced myself to walk forward toward him. Every step was harder to take than the last. He was smiling and joking with the man at the stand. He looked so sweet and innocent. He’s anything but!
As I got closer, I felt like my legs weighed a hundred pounds each. I was terrified. This man owns me. He controls me. He has the power of life and death over me. All of a sudden, as if in slow motion, I hear someone yell “Elizabeth?”
Kyung turned to me and looked me in the eyes with a completely surprised expression. To his right but closer to me was Bacon. He had come from a side street and was now walking toward me with one of his friends. I didn’t know what to do. Kyung dropped his food and stood there staring at me. I looked from him to Bacon and back again.
Without thinking, I turned and ran away from both of them. I turned down the same alleyway I had hid in earlier but I kept going. I heard Bacon running behind me yelling, “Elizabeth! Stop! STOP! What are you doing?” He was getting closer and I turned to the right. I found a doorway and I panicked. I tried the knob and it was open so I stepped in and closed the door behind me. It had a lock so I locked it. I stood with my back to the door, breathing hard, and when he started turning the knob, I jumped and squealed. It was completely dark in this room but I could hear things moving and I think it was rats.
“ELIZABETH! I KNOW YOU’RE IN THERE! OPEN THIS DOOR! WHAT ARE YOU DOING?” He sounded angry. I had come too far now to give up on my plan so I kept quiet. He kept trying the knob and finally he started kicking the door. I jumped again and covered my mouth so I wouldn’t make noise. I heard another voice that I didn’t recognize say, “Man, maybe she didn’t go in there. I think this door has always been locked.”
Bacon stopped kicking the door and I heard them moving away. He was still yelling my name and I thought this might be my only chance to get away so I carefully opened the door and looked both ways down the alley. I went in the opposite direction of his voice. The alleyways were like a maze and it wasn’t hard to lose him but now I had no idea where I was. I figured if I kept walking around I would either find the main road at some point.
I didn’t hear Bacon anymore but it was starting to get dark and some of the people in this alley looked scary. I screamed when hands grabbed me from a doorway and pulled me inside. I was shoved hard against the door and someone’s mouth was on mine, their tongue forcing it’s way between my lips and filling my mouth. I fought but he was too strong. When he pulled away, he said, “I knew it was you!” I was face to face with Park Kyung.

Notes