BTS Imagines
Oak Park Road
His fingers trace the outline of your body; warm and careful as if you are fragile. His kiss captivates you; gentle and emotional as if you are the only girl in the world. He holds you close as you wrap your arms around him enjoying the heat of his skin on your own. Running your hands through his hair, you hungrily kiss him as if it's your last day on earth. You never want him to let you go, not even for a second.
*
The graying of the sky is all you can see past your window, the rain droplets evident on the window pane. Your arm rests against your forehead, your lips remaining in a straight line as your mind swarms with numerous thoughts. Carefully, you force yourself to sit up, seeing more outside your window other than the crying sky. Gently rubbing your eyes, you furrow your eyebrows, the warm covers still tangled between your shins. The leafless trees border the building you're in, save for the swing set, a black paved section with a basketball hoop, and a large shed across from it. If one was to step outside the front of the building, there sits a church, surrounded by a gravel parking lot; next door a barb wire fence with an abandoned house and field.
It's been four months since you moved here in the fellowship hall; appreciatively, the area has been vacant since the falling of the church which saves you even more stress than what you've been in since moving here. Shaking your head to rid the sudden thoughts, you achingly move your legs over the bed, your feet landing on the grainy carpet. Resting your right hand against your back, you scoot to the bed frame, which has become a daily routine, gripping the wood until your fingers are ghost white. Letting out a steady sigh, with all of your strength you pull yourself to where you can stand.
"Oomf." A small whimper escapes your lips as you cringe. Being seven months pregnant sometimes has its perks, but this isn't one of them. Your body bent slightly forward, you sluggishly walk to your dresser drawers, pulling out some maternity clothes your mother lent to you before the move.
*FLASHBACK*
"So, when are you going to tell us?" Mom looks over at you, her expression showing a mixture of exhaustion and exasperation. It has been a month since you found out you were pregnant, and your mother is driving you to your doctor's appointment to check up on the baby to make sure everything is okay. "We have a right to know."
Your arms crossed over your chest in annoyance, you bite your lip, staring out the car window getting lost in the trees as the two of you zip by.
*END OF FLASHBACK*
Walking into the restroom, you let the vague memory fade as you turn the knob to the shower. The squeaky sound along with the rushing water hitting against the shower curtain sends a jolt of excitement. The chilly air causes goosebumps on your arms once you're undressed and you reach your fingertips to test if the water has warmed. Cautiously stepping into the tub part of the shower, the steaming water trickles down your skin; a satisfied grin forms on your lips. There is nothing like a steaming shower to ease an aching body. "Oh!"
You gasp in surprise as you feel a kick within your tummy. Your eyes flutter down to your swollen belly, your hands moving to caress it. "Look at you, what are you trying to do? Escape?" You say gently with a light giggle. When the baby kicks again, you can't help but smile. Now this- this is what I love about being pregnant. Once you're finished showering, you dry your hair and quickly dress, brushing your teeth and rinsing with mouth wash.
One thing you decided after your first doctor's visit was that you do not want to know what your baby's gender is until the day you give birth. Your mom agreed that she had done that with your younger sibling and thinks that it's a wonderful idea. Running a brush through your hair, you take one final look into the mirror and exit the bathroom. Swiftly but guardedly rounding a corner, you almost slam into a tall figure.
"Oh, oh I'm so sorry!" A deep voice sounds, and you realize the both of you are holding your arms out in front of you. Your heart pounding beneath you, you then breathe a sigh of relief as your eyes trail to the handsome face of Kim Namjoon. His eyes widen apologetically, as his thick lips part, his large hands still out in front of him.
"Oh Namjoon, you scared me." You giggle softly, still feeling the strong beat of your heart through your temples. "I'm so sorry, I was about to head out to mow the lawn, but just wanted to check and make sure you're okay." Namjoon timidly looks down at your huge abdomen, his hands now resting at his sides, then he returns his eyes to yours.
With a sweet grin, you nod. "It's okay, it's no biggie." You assure him, "Thank you for checking on me." Namjoon nods, his dimples showing as he gives you a shy grin then turns to head out of the building. Watching him until he disappears from your line of vision, you feel the creep of a blush make its way to your cheeks. In mild frustration, you run your hands through your hair trying to ignore the attraction you have towards him. You don't know if it's hormonal or emotional or what, but you shake your head and scold yourself, inwardly grateful you didn't blush in front of him.
Kim Namjoon works for your father, making sure the church grounds stay clean and cut; protecting it from any loiterers, wild animals, protesters, etc; maintaining the flower bushes surrounding the church and the fellowship hall, and mini projects your dad wants built on the property. Namjoon, matter of fact, is the reason there is a swing set and a shed, although the basketball hoop and pavement happened to be there already before Namjoon began working here. But sometimes, you watch him and your best friend Kim Taehyung play basketball outside your window on days when you're bored as can be; and, watching how competitive they get can be very amusing.
*FLASHBACK*
Taehyung holds you as the tears fall down your cheeks. He was the first person you told the news to, and the only friend who stayed by your side when you finally came forward with your discovery. "Shhh." He says softly against the side of your forehead. "It's going to be okay." He whispers.
"How?" You choke back another sob, "How am I going to tell my parents? My dad is going to kill me." The tears soak your cheeks along with Taehyung's shirt as he runs his fingers along the back of your head.
"Okay, now you're being dramatic." He says, lightly pecking the top of your head. His comment makes you chuckle, but only for a second before your heart turns with sadness.
"Maybe, I am. But you know my parents aren't going to take this lightly, especially not with what's been going on with the church." "Well, your dad should have thought of that before he had an affair with my mom." Taehyung swallows, his lips in a firm line as anger fills his eyes.
You squeeze your eyes shut for a moment as you tighten your arms around him; his bright, red hair glowing in the dim light of his bedroom. "I'm so sorry." You murmur.
"Hey.." Taehyung peers down at you, "You didn't know." You bury your head further into his chest, his thumb rubbing circles behind your back. "Besides," Taehyung's boxy smile fills his face as he stifles a laugh, "I think telling your parents you're pregnant is better than if you were to tell them how you truly feel about religion."
*END OF FLASHBACK*
With stiff shoulders, you let the memory fade once again, trying to avoid the subtle anger rising within you at the finding out of your dad's affair on your mother. An affair with your best friend's mother to be exact. Hence why your dad couldn't be as angry at you as he wanted to be when you finally worked up the bravery to tell your parents about your pregnancy. Instead, your parents and you made an agreement that you should move into the fellowship hall, that way you can be away from your parent's broken marriage, away from the gossiping church congregation, and focus on the health of you and the life growing inside of you.
*FLASHBACK*
Your mom looks frail as she twiddles with the crumpled tissue in her hands. Your heart breaks into a million pieces at the sight of her; tears still brimming her eyes as you both sit in her car in silence. The two of you had just gone to the grocery store to restock the kitchen in the fellowship hall and now are parked in front of the church to drop you off. The car that was supposed to be passed down to you is now with your dad and your younger sibling- leaving you car-less.
After a few more moments, your mom sniffs, running the tissue along her eyes to wipe off any excess tears before she speaks, "Y/N?"
"Yeah?" You say softly, sadness overwhelming you. You know your mom is beyond stressed, and your dad betraying her, your family, Taehyung's family and the church members is already a lot to handle on top of her oldest child carrying a baby. If my dad would let me get a job like I want to do, since everything started spiraling downwards, I could contribute to something instead of laying on my ass watching the world unfold negatively before me. Sadly, your mom agrees that you should wait a while after the baby is born before you consider returning to the work field. Instead your mother scored a second job on top of her already full-time job just to make sure you're taken care of; and for that, you'll forever be grateful.
"Do you- Do you think you could ask Namjoon to help take you to the hospital? Whenever it's time.. For you to have the baby?"
*END OF FLASHBACK*
With your mom working two jobs, she wasn't sure if she would be available if your water were to break unexpectantly; which is why she thought of Namjoon immediately. Namjoon happens to live in the fellowship hall, too. He lived here long before you ever moved in; your father offered Namjoon housing as a benefit for working for him. Realizing you've been standing in the same spot the past 20 minutes since Namjoon left, you turn on your heel back to your bedroom, fluffing the many pillows you have before slipping under the covers.
** FLASHBACK **
Feeling the urge to vomit, you rush to the porcelain throne, the heaving feeling refusing to leave until the yellow liquid spurts from your mouth. You hear the door swing open as heavy footsteps hurry to you. You don't have the strength to look at the intruder and, in the moment, the continuous gagging deems you defenseless. Before you can think, large hands swoop your hair back from the line of fire.
"It's okay. It's okay," The deep voice is soft, and you recognize it to be Kim Namjoon's.
Although, once the retching calms, embarrassment fills you as blood rushes to your cheeks.
"I'm so sorry." You whisper, wiping your mouth with your hand. Namjoon grabs a tissue from a tissue box sitting on the counter next to the sink.
"You don't have to be sorry," He says, lightly wiping the corners of your mouth. Namjoon never left your side after that. Every morning or afternoon depending on when he had to work, he would immediately check on you. You had only been there for two or three weeks at the time leading into the fourth month of your pregnancy before that incident; but up until the morning sickness finally left you, Namjoon held your hair back with every vomiting episode.
How he kept his patience with you, you could never understand. The first two weeks were filled with depression, just you sitting on your bed, the covers still over your legs as you would stare blankly in front of you; the stirring questions as to if you would ever be happy again never ceased. The loss of who you thought were your friends, the loss of your relationship with your father, and the loss of not getting to see Taehyung really broke you; also, adjusting to what was to become your new home brought a sense of sadness at first. Namjoon, even though not the most superb cook, would encourage you to eat; even reminding you to take prenatal vitamins your mom had bought when you first told her you were pregnant.
Taehyung texted to check up on you as often as he could. Having to deal with his broken-hearted father on top of two jobs, Taehyung couldn't visit you as often as he used to. Well... at least before the finding out of the affair. Besides, he ended up being the only true friend you ever had. The day you confessed your pregnancy to whom you thought were your best friends, Luna and Jo, they immediately, with widened eyes and mouths agape, stared at you as if you were the spawn of satan. They never spoke to you again, sending you daggers the moment they would pass by you, and gossiping about how slutty you were even though you had never slept with anyone until... that one person. In the end it doesn't matter what they think anyways. Taehyung was the first individual you told about your pregnancy and even though he was shocked, he held you tightly in his arms, letting you know he would help you in any way he could.
By the fifth month of pregnancy, although hormonal, you did come to the realization of how selfish you were being. It was no longer about you and your needs; it was also about your son or daughter who was growing within you. That was the breakthrough you had been needing for a while. Once the fellowship hall was restocked, you began cooking for Namjoon and you every single night when he was finished working on the church property. "Have you thought about any names?" Taehyung asked you over the phone one night as you were cooking dinner. You hadn't seen Taehyung since the day you first told him you were pregnant, and finally getting to hear his voice brought you joy that you had missed in a while.
At his question, you did pause, taking a quick sip of the broth that you were heating up.
"No... Honestly, haven't thought that far ahead yet." You admitted, the heat of the broth perfect before you added in some vegetables.
Taehyung chuckled, "I should have known."
"Hey!" You jokingly raised your voice, "And what do you mean by that?"
"You named your parakeet, Bird."
You stifled a laugh before stirring the vegetables, "In my defense, I was seven years old."
Taehyung still chuckling spoke, "Yes, but old enough to choose a name. You could have called him Tweety at least."
With a defeated smile you replied, "Well no worries, I don't plan on being that simple with my child's name."
Overall, Taehyung was and still is very excited about the baby which makes you happy. You know your mother is too, being this will be her first grandchild; plus, she has never been as strict as your father is. Plus, the affair really calmed him down; if he wasn't guilty of anything then, you wouldn't be where you are now. Once dinner is finished, Namjoon walks in, setting his work boots next to the door and hanging his coat up as he always does every evening.
You ask each other how both of your days went and dig into your food the minute you have the table set. One thing about Namjoon is that he's an atheist. Of course, your father never knew even when he hired him, and Taehyung and you have kept that secret even to this day. Namjoon, though will not admit it, works on the Church grounds to provide for his mother and sister who live not that far from the church grounds. There's a lot of things your parents don't know for the sake of your sanity, and to protect Namjoon. Your father being the strict pastor he used to be; and possibly, still strict with the beliefs he is caught up in, would fire Namjoon if he were to know of Namjoon's beliefs. Of course, Namjoon also knows how you truly feel about the whole ordeal, and of course Namjoon swore to never tell your secret as well.
After making more small talk, silence follows, just the sound of clinking spoons against the both of your bowls of soup. A thought has remained on your mind for some time and even though you have never said it out loud, maybe it's time that you do. Namjoon has always opened up to Taehyung and you, even over things that you both would have never thought he'd open up to you two about. And ever since you've moved in the fellowship hall, it's as if Namjoon has caught your attention more than you'd like to admit. You always found him to be very handsome, quiet and hard-working; but now, it's like you learn something new about him every day.
With your spoon, you play at a piece of broccoli swimming in the broth before speaking, "They don't know," you say slowly, keeping your vision on the bowl in front of you. You can feel Namjoon's eyes on you, his expression probably showing confusion. "They don't know who the father is." Your eyes meet Namjoon's as guilt consumes you, "I won't tell them."
After a moment of searching your eyes, he slowly nods, showing a sense of understanding. "Besides, I'm surprised my father was lenient enough to let me live here." You admit, your eyes returning to look towards the bowl. "If he wasn't so guilty over the affair, I would be homeless."
"I wouldn't let that happen." Namjoon says suddenly. With wide eyes, you stare at him, your heart fluttering at the shock of his words. Speechless, the rest of the dinner continues in silence, your heart refusing to steady. The sixth month of pregnancy comes swiftly, your belly larger, your feet swelling, and your body aching in random places. Pregnancy cravings have been no joke either.
Namjoon has remained by your side; even tends to your pregnancy cravings whether it's at midnight or 3 AM. The second he sees your expression displaying discomfort at any point, he comes running with a heating pack and making sure you're comfortable before he heads out to continue yard maintenance. Even on nights you can't sleep, he holds your hand until your eyelids fight to stay open; days you need to go by the doctor for a checkup, Namjoon drives you there waiting in the work truck until you come back. With all he has been doing for you the past couple of months, it's like the feelings you have for him are continuing to grow even though that's not what you should be feeling. If your dad were to find out, it wouldn't be good for Namjoon. After everything, you want to protect him at all costs.
The night comes quickly it seems after a long day of attempting to clean, and before you know it, you have dinner set out on the table with some steaming chicken and rice. You hear the front door open, Namjoon steps in, the smell of the outdoors filling the wide-open space. There used to be rows of white tables and chairs spread along the building, but thankfully Namjoon moved them all into the shed except for maybe one table or two with a couple chairs.
"Hiya," You greet, trying to avoid the sudden pounding of your heart. Namjoon flashes a smile as he takes off his jacket and hangs it on the coat hanger next to the door. "How was your day?"
"It was good, thank you." Namjoon replies. You start to settle in your seat when Namjoon takes long strides until he makes it to you, a shy grin on his mouth. "How was yours?" He says, his right hand on the small of your back, the other holding your hand as he helps you into your seat.
Something in his eyes gives you a strange longing, but you brush it off inwardly trying to focus on the question he just asked you as he moves to settle in the chair across from you. The distance from you to the table due to your belly is something you've finally been growing used to; with a smirk, you reach for your fork and speak before you dig into your dinner, "It was good, and thank you.. For helping me."
"Anytime." The two of you hold eyes for a moment, heat rushing to your cheeks as you timidly return your eyes to your food. An awkward silence follows as Namjoon and you continue to eat. It's hard to make conversation sometimes especially when there's nothing really left to say. For a second, you feel Namjoon's eyes on you as if he wants to say something but decides against it.
You feel your baby kick against your abdomen, your hand instinctively moving to your stomach. Namjoon jumps at your gesture, his eyes wide as he stops mid-chew.
"It's okay," You chuckle, at his reaction. "The baby's just kicking." His reaction reminds you of the first time you ever felt your baby kick; it was like a weird flutter, hard to describe really. It was so unreal; it took you a second to realize that's exactly what the flutter was. Just your baby moving inside you.
Namjoon swallows the bite of food almost nervously, setting the silverware in his hand back on the napkin. "Here." You say softly, slowly starting to stand to your feet. Before you get the chance, Namjoon jumps from his chair, rounding the table, immediately reaching for your hand. Instead of relying on his strength to help you stand, you remain seated, moving his warm hand to the spot where the baby kicked a few minutes ago.
Namjoon kneels to level with you, his mouth slightly ajar as he waits. The second the baby kicks, an excited smile forms on his lips as he meets your eyes. You can't help but smile with tremendous joy at his reaction. As your hand continues resting above his, the two of you continue feeling the baby kick once more, your eyes never breaking contact. You realize how close Namjoon's face is to yours; the handsome curve of his chin, his dimples, his beautiful, brown eyes, and his genuine grin that always seems to make your heart melt. You've always seen something in him, but right now, you see him shining in an even brighter light.
Namjoon's lips then brush yours catching you in the sweetest surprise. Your hands find their way to his hair as he continues to kiss you; his hands move to rest on the chair you're sitting in as he leans more into the kiss. The feeling of admiration brings a smile to you as Namjoon moves his warm fingertips to your face, gently stroking your cheek with his thumb.
It's then you realize how long you have wanted to feel his kiss, how loving he is when he touches you, the surreal feeling of bliss beneath your chest, the jittery excitement you feel the second he walks in the room; his wide smile when you make him laugh, his constant presence the second he senses something may be wrong with you or the baby, his kind words whenever you need them, the encouragement to wake up every morning with the eagerness of your soon-to-be son or daughter you will one day hold in your arms; how hard working he is, his motivation to get the job done, his determination to protect you the way you are determined to protect him; his never ending support that you never realized you needed. In this moment, you don't care what anyone thinks. You are in love with Kim Namjoon.
** END OF FLASHBACK **
Your eyes flutter open as you take a long exhale, stretching your arms above your head. It's pitch black beyond your bedroom window and you furrow your eyebrows in frustration. You didn't mean to sleep as long as you just did, but gathering yourself, you cautiously sit up, performing your 'daily routine' of scooting to the bedpost to help you to your feet. Carefully you walk to the restroom to tinkle, then brushing your teeth and rinsing with mouth wash.
Quickly looking at a wall clock as you exit the bathroom, you notice it's 7:00pm; Namjoon should be in from work even though you inwardly feel horrible for not having dinner ready for him like you typically do. It's eerily quiet you notice, and you pause seeing the light on in the main area. Okay, so maybe Namjoon is here? You wonder. Rounding the infamous corner that leads to accidental body train wrecks, you freeze in place.
"SURPRISE!!!!!" The sudden outburst nearly knocks you off your feet; but thankfully instead, your hand flies to your chest as your eyes widen into baseballs.
There standing in front of you is none other than your long-lost best friend, Kim Taehyung, and Kim Namjoon.
"Wha-?" You can barely speak, the shock sending you into a slight reel of light headiness. Numerous pink and blue balloons are floating to the top of the ceiling; two tables, one with a pink tablecloth and the other a blue tablecloth, sit off to the side decorated with a cake and a few gifts. Tears well in your eyes as Tae's boxy smile fills his face. As much as you want to run in Taehyung's arms, you start taking swift steps forward; he meets you halfway and envelops you in a warm embrace.
"Wow, look at you!" He chuckles, his deep voice bringing you comfort. Taehyung steps back and gestures towards your stomach. "Your belly is huge!"
Namjoon steps forward, his dimples showing in his wide smile as he squeezes Taehyung's shoulder. You speak, "I know, I can't believe how fast this pregnancy is flying by!"
Taehyung's loose, fiery red hair lays on his head as it did months ago, his smile never fading as his brown eyes hold tears. You pull him into another hug; after a moment, pulling away your arms remain linked with his. "Your father let you come?" You then ask, concern filling you.
"Well, no." He admits. "I told him Namjoon and I were going to a basketball game."
Laughter fills you because of course Taehyung would do that, "You sly fox," You tease as he
quickly pecks your forehead. "You know you love me," He winks. Namjoon and Tae moving to either side of you, grab your hands and lead you to a chair next to the table with the gifts settled on it. Joy overwhelms you as tears of gratitude spill onto your cheeks once more.
"You guys didn't have to do this." You say, wiping the tears off your face. "What did I do to deserve the two of you?"
Namjoon never let go of your hand, his thumb gently caressing it, "Taehyung mentioned how when you were kids how you loved surprises especially if it involved a small party of some sort so," Namjoon nods toward Taehyung, "And I knew how much you missed him, too. I just wanted to do something to celebrate you. And, the baby."
"Thank you. Thank you so much to both of you." You cry, your hands still wiping at your cheeks. As if Namjoon reads your mind, he leans in and kisses you sweetly, but only for a few seconds.
"You two are on kissing terms again?" Taehyung teases once you and Namjoon pull away.
You stick your tongue out at him, "Oh, be quiet." You say goofily, the smell of the cake meeting your nose as Taehyung begins to cut it.
"Don't cut it unevenly." Namjoon jokes, Taehyung shooting him an annoyed look.
"Maybe we should have let [Y/N] open presents first."
By the end of the night, icing had met all three of your faces; some getting into Taehyung's red hair, some swiped across Namjoon's neck, and some on your eyebrows and possibly up your nose. The endless laughter, the spontaneous jokes, the wrapping paper from your gifts sprawled out across the ground. If there is anything, you will forever be grateful for, it's for your best friend in the whole world, and the beautiful man you have fallen in love with all over again.
Little do they know, within the past months after finding out that you were pregnant, they both mended your broken heart and put it back together. You don't know where you'd be without them. As the three of you begin cleaning the fellowship hall, you boxing the cake and putting it in the fridge, you can't help but smile. The idea hits you suddenly, and tears fill your eyes.
After scolding yourself for so long for not thinking hard on the subject,
right here, standing in the kitchen after a wonderful evening,
you finally have a name picked out for your little one.
****
2 months later...
"Namjoon, I'll be fine," You assure him, as he rests his hands on your sides. Concern clouds his expression. "Namjoon, I'm not due until next week."
"I know, but still," He kisses you quickly, "I'm still worried."
"No need, I'll be fine." You smile. The two of you have run out of groceries, and to make sure you both have everything you need before the baby arrives, you asked Namjoon if he could run by the grocery store that's only minutes away. "You'll be back before you know it."
"Okay," Namjoon kisses you once more, your head spinning once he pulls away. He turns to open the front door, but pauses returning to look at you, "I love you." He says. Warmth fills your chest at his words. "I love you, too." You whisper. With one last smile, Namjoon leaves, shutting the door behind him. You turn to waddle towards the kitchen, just to clean whatever you can and maybe begin cooking lunch. You hospital bag is already packed for next week because you like to be prepared sometimes, so that's one less worry. Also, Namjoon and you already have a game plan set for whenever it's time for the trip to the hospital, so once next week rolls around you both already know what to do. Before you make it to the kitchen, you feel a slight ache in your abdomen.
"Oh," You groan, caressing the hurting area. "Maybe I should just go lay down for a bit." You decide instead of cooking. Waddling toward your bedroom, near your bed, stands a cradle
Namjoon built and surprised you with a few weeks ago; nestled in the corner of the crib sits a little heart shaped plush character Taehyung had given you at the baby shower. Next to the heart plush sits a koala plush that Namjoon had given you as well. Whoever your little one is, you know he/she will love these little plushies just as much as you do.
And, your baby will be lucky enough to get to know his/her uncle Taehyung and his/her-
The sharp pain returns causing you to cringe as you lean against your bed post. It takes you a moment to recover as you straighten yourself. Suddenly, before you can even process what's happening, a gush of water flows out of you soaking the carpet along with your feet.
"No, no, no, no," You panic, your eyes frantically search the room for your phone. Namjoon just left, but he probably hasn't had a chance to look at the groceries, and though it's your first pregnancy, one thing you do know is, once the water breaks, the baby needs to be out as soon as possible.
Your phone is nowhere in sight as you try to move swiftly, your hands patting at your bed, the furniture, all the while you're trying to remember where you set it. You turn to head to the bathroom, another sharp pain taking over as you lean against the wall. Gasping, you try to endure the discomfort, your aching body trying to stay strong as you look along the bathroom sink to see if you happened to leave your phone there.
With no luck and leaving a water trail behind you with every step you take, you try to make it to the kitchen, the pain so unbearable you can barely think straight. "Gosh, where did I put it?" You choke, slowly but surely reaching the kitchen. Your phone lays on the counter top where you must have left it this morning after making breakfast. With shaking fingers, you unlock your phone trying to pull Namjoon's number up.
"Agh!" Another contraction surges through you, your hand squeezing your phone unintentionally. "Holy Shiva." You grimace, trying to force yourself to focus on the task at hand. You manage to get the phone ringing, Namjoon picks up after the first ring.
"Hello?" He answers.
"Namjoon, it's time." You say.
"Ohhh, shit!" Namjoon says as soon as the realization hits him. "Hold on tight, I'm on my way, just hold tight, I'm coming!"
*FLASHBACK*
Your father introduced you to him unintentionally. You just happened to run by the church that day to drop off the keys to the work truck. "[Y/N], this is Kim Namjoon. He's going to be taking care of the church grounds for us, isn't God good?" Your dad said.
"Hello, it's nice to meet you." You greet, holding your hand out, Namjoon shaking it gently.
"It's nice to meet you too, Ma'am," Namjoon replies politely. Your father then shows him around, your eyes curiously gazing at the back of the tall boy. He wore a black turtle neck with a green, denim jacket over it. A black hat covered his brown hair, and his dark, blue jeans complimented his long legs as well as a nice pair of brown sperries. He's definitely attractive you remembered thinking, and something in you wanted to get to know him.
*END OF FLASHBACK*
Namjoon bursts through the door, "[Y/N], I'm here! Baby, I'm right here." Namjoon throws his arm around you as he helps you to the work truck, thrusting the door open and lifting you into the seat. "I'm going to grab the hospital bag, I'll be right back." You nod as tears flow down your face, the pain waving through you once again. As soon as Namjoon retrieves the bag, he bursts into the seat of the driver's side, and slams on the gas pedal as soon as he gets the truck started.
*FLASHBACK*
Any opportunity you had, you were trying to get to know Namjoon. It took him a while to warm up to you, but you were too determined to be his friend that you weren't going to give up that easily. Namjoon, you believe, picked up on that after a while, especially after annoying him every time he was sawing wood in preparation for the shed your dad asked him to build. Even when Namjoon was building the swing set, you made sure you were right there, talking to him nonstop until he acknowledged you.
You would call Taehyung after every encounter updating him about the boy you were having a hard time cracking. "Come help me." You pled, hearing Taehyung's sigh over the phone.
"You are so annoying." He teased.
"You know you love me," You gloated. With defeat, Taehyung joined you, even bringing a basketball along just in case if Namjoon happened to be into sports. Luna and Jo knew of your undying crush on Namjoon because they even noticed the determination you had.
"He doesn't even come to the services." Jo whined, "Don't you think it'd be best to get to know someone that's more active in the church?"
You rolled your eyes, "I'll catch you later."
*END OF FLASHBACK*
Namjoon swerves past cars on the highway, both hands on the wheel. "We're almost there [Y/N], we're almost there!"
You grip at the bar above you, your other hand on your abdomen. The pain is never ending, and it's like you barely have gotten the chance to breathe. All you know is you want your baby out; the anticipation of holding him or her in your arms is the only thing other than Namjoon that's keeping you sane right now.
"Just a few more miles, we will be there. Just breathe," Namjoon's voice is shaky as he keeps his frantic, wide eyes on the road.
"GAH!" You lean forward, a contraction hitting you once again.
*FLASHBACK*
"You guys aren't going to stop until I'm your friend, am I right?" Namjoon held the basketball to his chest as Tae jumped around in front of him, his arms wide open in preparation of keeping the ball from flying into the basketball net.
"Damn straight." You said. Namjoon's eyes widened in surprise when he heard you curse.
"I thought church girls were the good ones." He joked.
"Nope," You put emphasis on the 'p.' "Now hurry up. If you win, I will leave you alone for good. If TaeTae wins then we treat you to dinner and a movie. Algesseo?"
Namjoon smirked "Okay." Swiftly he turned, thrusting the ball toward the hoop. The basketball hit the ring, and right when your heart began to sink; instead, a sigh of relief filled you the second the basketball avoided the net and landed in Taehyung's arms.
"HAH!" You rejoiced, Namjoon shaking his head with a hint of a smile on his lips. "Looks like it's going to be a burger and fries kind of night." You winked.
*END OF FLASHBACK*
Namjoon turns with a purpose into the parking lot of the hospital. Once he parks, he jumps out of the truck, running to the passenger side, lifting you out of the truck and carefully placing you steadily on your feet. He throws the hospital bag over his shoulder as he quickly locks the truck, then places his arms around you. "It's okay. It's okay." He comforts you as he leads you to the hospital entrance. You try to speak between sniffles as you both enter the hospital, but all that leaves your lips are small whimpers. Everything becomes a blur as a male nurse with black hair approaches you with a wheelchair. His name tag reads Park Jimin, and he helps Namjoon settle you into the chair. As he rolls you into a hospital room, a female nurse by the name of Monnie helps you change into a nightgown, then hooks you up to what seems like a million machines whilst trying to make you as comfortable as possible.
Namjoon grips your hand as Jimin sets a chair next to the bed for Namjoon to sit in. The next thing you know, a tall man walks in already dawned in a scrub hat, mouth mask, and gloves.
"Hello, I am Doctor Kim Seokjin, Doctor Jung Hoseok was called into an emergency surgery, so I will be the one to help deliver your baby today." You nod quickly, the contractions growing unbearable by the second. "Alright, I am going to check your dilation, just breathe in and out." After a few moments, you squeeze your eyes shut, still gripping onto Namjoon's hand for dear life. "Alright, she is dilated 3cm; once you are at 10cm, we will begin pushing.
No worries, I will alert you as soon as I need you to start pushing."
"No worries baby, they're coming." Namjoon says softly, planting a sweet kiss on your forehead.
*FLASHBACK*
After that day at the basketball hoop, Namjoon, Taehyung and you became very close. That's when you and Taehyung learned of Namjoon's atheism as well as him caring for his mother and his sister.
"My dad was never really in the picture," Namjoon said one day finishing up the final paint to the shed. It had been six months since he had been hired, and he finally was opening up to you two about his life before coming here to Oak Park. "Don't really know too much about him. Thankfully your dad gave me a work truck and a place to live to work here. Now, I can afford the rent for the house my mom and sister live in."
It's crazy how much you could learn about an individual. The way they talk, the way they walk, their mannerisms, their past, what they want for the future, etc. You'll never forget the day you first kissed Namjoon. The two of you were just leaning against a mini, red monkey bar; there was no denying the feelings you had for him, and you knew he felt the same about you, especially with the way he held your gaze.
You had never really been kissed before. Taehyung and you did on a dare one time and it was only for a second. Of course, someone, Jo to be exact, blabbed to your parents which resulted in Taehyung and you getting grounded for a whole month. Taehyung and you never kissed anyone again after that point. Except, for you. Right now. You remember leaning in, Namjoon meeting halfway until your lips touched. Warm and inviting, he wrapped his arms around you as you wrapped yours around his neck, his lips moved with yours so perfectly as he pressed his body even closer to you.
*END OF FLASHBACK*
The hours drag as the pain grows even more. You used to believe strongly in epidurals and even though the thought of being painless sounds quite heavenly at a time like this, you still decide to tough it out until the end. Doctor Kim Seokjin checks your dilation once more; Namjoon rests his head against your forehead, exhaustion in his expression.
"10cm. Alright, [Y/N], your baby's coming. When I say push, you push. Okay." The doctor positions himself in preparation for the arrival of your baby. "One, two, three, push!"
"AGH!" You grunt, a small scream escapes the back of your throat as you push with every fiber of strength in your body. "Breathe, breathe." Namjoon lets you grip his hand; you can feel the sweat pouring from your forehead as the unspeakable pain ignites throughout your body.
"Is she here?" The click of heels captures your attention once you're finished with the first push. "Oh honey, I'm here!" Your mother, your younger sibling, as well as the shiny red hair of Taehyung rushes to the other side of the hospital bed, your mom brushing your hair from your face as she kisses your forehead. You want to ask where your dad is, but before you have the chance the doctor shouts, "Push!"
"AAAAAAAGH!" You wail as you manage to push once more with all your might. Taehyung grabs your other hand, alarm in his features at the sight of his best friend in so much pain.
"You can- you can do it!" The nurse Min Yoongi encourages as he rushes around the room to check the machines to make sure everything is still functioning properly.
After the second push, pain still erupting, you look over at your mother, "I'm- I'm so glad you're here." After another sixty to sixty-five seconds, the doctor's voice takes over, "Push!"
*FLASHBACK*
Namjoon's fingers traced the outline of your body; warm and careful as if you were fragile. His kiss captivated you; gentle and emotional as if you were the only girl in the world. A whole year after knowing each other finally lead to a beautiful night like this. Namjoon held you close as you wrapped your arms around him enjoying the heat of his skin on your own. Running your hands through his hair, you hungrily kissed him as if it was your last day on earth. You never wanted him to let you go, not even for a second.
The two of you became one for the first time that night.
*END OF FLASHBACK*
"Alright, one more! Almost done! Push!"
Breathing in one long inhale, with a loud scream, you push with all you have left in you. Sudden relief takes over your body as pure exhaustion rises. The sound of a baby crying echoes in the room. With gloomy eyes, you look over to see your mother with tears running down her face and onto her hand that's covering her agape mouth as her eyes stay locked in front of her. Taehyung's eyes along with your sibling's are wide as they look in the direction of the crying infant. Groggily, you turn to look at the father of your child, Kim Namjoon, as he rises slowly from his seat, his warm hand still in yours. When you finally get the strength to look in front of you, slowly sitting yourself up, you make eye contact with Doctor Kim Seokjin. You can see the smile in his eyes though he's wearing a mouth mask, "It's a girl."
"Oh," You breathe as tears trickle down your face. Your eyes land on your baby girl as she's crying.
"Sir, would you like to do the honors?" The doctor hands a pair of scissors to Namjoon to cut the both of your daughter's umbilical cord.
"Wait," Your mom says, realization hitting her. She looks at you with wide eyes, "Is- is?"
Right then your father walks in, his mouth ajar as the sudden tension fills the room. Taehyung's shoulders stiffen at the sight of him, but he keeps his lips sealed. The sudden fear of your dad finding out the truth vacates you when you know Namjoon, Taehyung and you can conquer anything.
"Yes," You say as bravery takes over you, your eyes connecting with your dad's although your mom's stare never leaves you. "Namjoon is the father." You turn to Namjoon, tears still flooding your face. He's crying too as you both share a knowing look. You nod for Namjoon to continue towards your daughter to cut the umbilical cord. Taehyung and your mother pull out their phones to take pictures not wanting to miss a single moment regardless of your father's arrival; Namjoon cuts the umbilical cord, turning to hand the scissors to the doctor. You watch Namjoon as he caresses his daughter's cheek, his smile never leaving him as endless joy fills your soul. The nurses then rush to clean her off and to quickly weigh her soon wrapping her in a soft, pink blanket.
"She is 7 pounds and 5 ounces." The nurse Jungkook speaks.
Your father stands off to the side, his chin quivers as his eyes never leave your beautiful daughter. "Are you ready to hold her?" Monnie asks, her kind grin meeting her eyes.
"Yes." You choke back a sob, "I want to hold her."
Monnie gently places you and Namjoon's daughter into your arms, Namjoon returning to his seat beside you. You stare at her small face, her eyes closed as she puckers her tiny lips. Her skin so smooth underneath your fingertips as you caress her cheek. "She's so perfect." You breathe.
"Just like you." Namjoon whispers. When you both make eye contact, you kiss him. Your love for him as powerful as it has ever been.
"I love you." You whisper.
"I love you." He says.
"Uh," A deep voice sounds. You look to see a now smiling Taehyung, "So, um, as the Uncle, I must ask," The room chuckles as Taehyung raises his index finger, "What's her name?"
"Ah," You say. Your mother squeezes your shoulder as your sibling gives you a sweet nod; Namjoon stares at you with adoration; and your father steps closer with his hands in his pockets, the two of you sharing a small smile. You return your eyes to Taehyung.
"Taejun." You look back at the little bundle of joy in your arms, her eyes slightly open as a tiny smile forms on her lips, "Her name is Kim Taejun."
*
The graying of the sky is all you can see past your window, the rain droplets evident on the window pane. Your arm rests against your forehead, your lips remaining in a straight line as your mind swarms with numerous thoughts. Carefully, you force yourself to sit up, seeing more outside your window other than the crying sky. Gently rubbing your eyes, you furrow your eyebrows, the warm covers still tangled between your shins. The leafless trees border the building you're in, save for the swing set, a black paved section with a basketball hoop, and a large shed across from it. If one was to step outside the front of the building, there sits a church, surrounded by a gravel parking lot; next door a barb wire fence with an abandoned house and field.
It's been four months since you moved here in the fellowship hall; appreciatively, the area has been vacant since the falling of the church which saves you even more stress than what you've been in since moving here. Shaking your head to rid the sudden thoughts, you achingly move your legs over the bed, your feet landing on the grainy carpet. Resting your right hand against your back, you scoot to the bed frame, which has become a daily routine, gripping the wood until your fingers are ghost white. Letting out a steady sigh, with all of your strength you pull yourself to where you can stand.
"Oomf." A small whimper escapes your lips as you cringe. Being seven months pregnant sometimes has its perks, but this isn't one of them. Your body bent slightly forward, you sluggishly walk to your dresser drawers, pulling out some maternity clothes your mother lent to you before the move.
*FLASHBACK*
"So, when are you going to tell us?" Mom looks over at you, her expression showing a mixture of exhaustion and exasperation. It has been a month since you found out you were pregnant, and your mother is driving you to your doctor's appointment to check up on the baby to make sure everything is okay. "We have a right to know."
Your arms crossed over your chest in annoyance, you bite your lip, staring out the car window getting lost in the trees as the two of you zip by.
*END OF FLASHBACK*
Walking into the restroom, you let the vague memory fade as you turn the knob to the shower. The squeaky sound along with the rushing water hitting against the shower curtain sends a jolt of excitement. The chilly air causes goosebumps on your arms once you're undressed and you reach your fingertips to test if the water has warmed. Cautiously stepping into the tub part of the shower, the steaming water trickles down your skin; a satisfied grin forms on your lips. There is nothing like a steaming shower to ease an aching body. "Oh!"
You gasp in surprise as you feel a kick within your tummy. Your eyes flutter down to your swollen belly, your hands moving to caress it. "Look at you, what are you trying to do? Escape?" You say gently with a light giggle. When the baby kicks again, you can't help but smile. Now this- this is what I love about being pregnant. Once you're finished showering, you dry your hair and quickly dress, brushing your teeth and rinsing with mouth wash.
One thing you decided after your first doctor's visit was that you do not want to know what your baby's gender is until the day you give birth. Your mom agreed that she had done that with your younger sibling and thinks that it's a wonderful idea. Running a brush through your hair, you take one final look into the mirror and exit the bathroom. Swiftly but guardedly rounding a corner, you almost slam into a tall figure.
"Oh, oh I'm so sorry!" A deep voice sounds, and you realize the both of you are holding your arms out in front of you. Your heart pounding beneath you, you then breathe a sigh of relief as your eyes trail to the handsome face of Kim Namjoon. His eyes widen apologetically, as his thick lips part, his large hands still out in front of him.
"Oh Namjoon, you scared me." You giggle softly, still feeling the strong beat of your heart through your temples. "I'm so sorry, I was about to head out to mow the lawn, but just wanted to check and make sure you're okay." Namjoon timidly looks down at your huge abdomen, his hands now resting at his sides, then he returns his eyes to yours.
With a sweet grin, you nod. "It's okay, it's no biggie." You assure him, "Thank you for checking on me." Namjoon nods, his dimples showing as he gives you a shy grin then turns to head out of the building. Watching him until he disappears from your line of vision, you feel the creep of a blush make its way to your cheeks. In mild frustration, you run your hands through your hair trying to ignore the attraction you have towards him. You don't know if it's hormonal or emotional or what, but you shake your head and scold yourself, inwardly grateful you didn't blush in front of him.
Kim Namjoon works for your father, making sure the church grounds stay clean and cut; protecting it from any loiterers, wild animals, protesters, etc; maintaining the flower bushes surrounding the church and the fellowship hall, and mini projects your dad wants built on the property. Namjoon, matter of fact, is the reason there is a swing set and a shed, although the basketball hoop and pavement happened to be there already before Namjoon began working here. But sometimes, you watch him and your best friend Kim Taehyung play basketball outside your window on days when you're bored as can be; and, watching how competitive they get can be very amusing.
*FLASHBACK*
Taehyung holds you as the tears fall down your cheeks. He was the first person you told the news to, and the only friend who stayed by your side when you finally came forward with your discovery. "Shhh." He says softly against the side of your forehead. "It's going to be okay." He whispers.
"How?" You choke back another sob, "How am I going to tell my parents? My dad is going to kill me." The tears soak your cheeks along with Taehyung's shirt as he runs his fingers along the back of your head.
"Okay, now you're being dramatic." He says, lightly pecking the top of your head. His comment makes you chuckle, but only for a second before your heart turns with sadness.
"Maybe, I am. But you know my parents aren't going to take this lightly, especially not with what's been going on with the church." "Well, your dad should have thought of that before he had an affair with my mom." Taehyung swallows, his lips in a firm line as anger fills his eyes.
You squeeze your eyes shut for a moment as you tighten your arms around him; his bright, red hair glowing in the dim light of his bedroom. "I'm so sorry." You murmur.
"Hey.." Taehyung peers down at you, "You didn't know." You bury your head further into his chest, his thumb rubbing circles behind your back. "Besides," Taehyung's boxy smile fills his face as he stifles a laugh, "I think telling your parents you're pregnant is better than if you were to tell them how you truly feel about religion."
*END OF FLASHBACK*
With stiff shoulders, you let the memory fade once again, trying to avoid the subtle anger rising within you at the finding out of your dad's affair on your mother. An affair with your best friend's mother to be exact. Hence why your dad couldn't be as angry at you as he wanted to be when you finally worked up the bravery to tell your parents about your pregnancy. Instead, your parents and you made an agreement that you should move into the fellowship hall, that way you can be away from your parent's broken marriage, away from the gossiping church congregation, and focus on the health of you and the life growing inside of you.
*FLASHBACK*
Your mom looks frail as she twiddles with the crumpled tissue in her hands. Your heart breaks into a million pieces at the sight of her; tears still brimming her eyes as you both sit in her car in silence. The two of you had just gone to the grocery store to restock the kitchen in the fellowship hall and now are parked in front of the church to drop you off. The car that was supposed to be passed down to you is now with your dad and your younger sibling- leaving you car-less.
After a few more moments, your mom sniffs, running the tissue along her eyes to wipe off any excess tears before she speaks, "Y/N?"
"Yeah?" You say softly, sadness overwhelming you. You know your mom is beyond stressed, and your dad betraying her, your family, Taehyung's family and the church members is already a lot to handle on top of her oldest child carrying a baby. If my dad would let me get a job like I want to do, since everything started spiraling downwards, I could contribute to something instead of laying on my ass watching the world unfold negatively before me. Sadly, your mom agrees that you should wait a while after the baby is born before you consider returning to the work field. Instead your mother scored a second job on top of her already full-time job just to make sure you're taken care of; and for that, you'll forever be grateful.
"Do you- Do you think you could ask Namjoon to help take you to the hospital? Whenever it's time.. For you to have the baby?"
*END OF FLASHBACK*
With your mom working two jobs, she wasn't sure if she would be available if your water were to break unexpectantly; which is why she thought of Namjoon immediately. Namjoon happens to live in the fellowship hall, too. He lived here long before you ever moved in; your father offered Namjoon housing as a benefit for working for him. Realizing you've been standing in the same spot the past 20 minutes since Namjoon left, you turn on your heel back to your bedroom, fluffing the many pillows you have before slipping under the covers.
** FLASHBACK **
Feeling the urge to vomit, you rush to the porcelain throne, the heaving feeling refusing to leave until the yellow liquid spurts from your mouth. You hear the door swing open as heavy footsteps hurry to you. You don't have the strength to look at the intruder and, in the moment, the continuous gagging deems you defenseless. Before you can think, large hands swoop your hair back from the line of fire.
"It's okay. It's okay," The deep voice is soft, and you recognize it to be Kim Namjoon's.
Although, once the retching calms, embarrassment fills you as blood rushes to your cheeks.
"I'm so sorry." You whisper, wiping your mouth with your hand. Namjoon grabs a tissue from a tissue box sitting on the counter next to the sink.
"You don't have to be sorry," He says, lightly wiping the corners of your mouth. Namjoon never left your side after that. Every morning or afternoon depending on when he had to work, he would immediately check on you. You had only been there for two or three weeks at the time leading into the fourth month of your pregnancy before that incident; but up until the morning sickness finally left you, Namjoon held your hair back with every vomiting episode.
How he kept his patience with you, you could never understand. The first two weeks were filled with depression, just you sitting on your bed, the covers still over your legs as you would stare blankly in front of you; the stirring questions as to if you would ever be happy again never ceased. The loss of who you thought were your friends, the loss of your relationship with your father, and the loss of not getting to see Taehyung really broke you; also, adjusting to what was to become your new home brought a sense of sadness at first. Namjoon, even though not the most superb cook, would encourage you to eat; even reminding you to take prenatal vitamins your mom had bought when you first told her you were pregnant.
Taehyung texted to check up on you as often as he could. Having to deal with his broken-hearted father on top of two jobs, Taehyung couldn't visit you as often as he used to. Well... at least before the finding out of the affair. Besides, he ended up being the only true friend you ever had. The day you confessed your pregnancy to whom you thought were your best friends, Luna and Jo, they immediately, with widened eyes and mouths agape, stared at you as if you were the spawn of satan. They never spoke to you again, sending you daggers the moment they would pass by you, and gossiping about how slutty you were even though you had never slept with anyone until... that one person. In the end it doesn't matter what they think anyways. Taehyung was the first individual you told about your pregnancy and even though he was shocked, he held you tightly in his arms, letting you know he would help you in any way he could.
By the fifth month of pregnancy, although hormonal, you did come to the realization of how selfish you were being. It was no longer about you and your needs; it was also about your son or daughter who was growing within you. That was the breakthrough you had been needing for a while. Once the fellowship hall was restocked, you began cooking for Namjoon and you every single night when he was finished working on the church property. "Have you thought about any names?" Taehyung asked you over the phone one night as you were cooking dinner. You hadn't seen Taehyung since the day you first told him you were pregnant, and finally getting to hear his voice brought you joy that you had missed in a while.
At his question, you did pause, taking a quick sip of the broth that you were heating up.
"No... Honestly, haven't thought that far ahead yet." You admitted, the heat of the broth perfect before you added in some vegetables.
Taehyung chuckled, "I should have known."
"Hey!" You jokingly raised your voice, "And what do you mean by that?"
"You named your parakeet, Bird."
You stifled a laugh before stirring the vegetables, "In my defense, I was seven years old."
Taehyung still chuckling spoke, "Yes, but old enough to choose a name. You could have called him Tweety at least."
With a defeated smile you replied, "Well no worries, I don't plan on being that simple with my child's name."
Overall, Taehyung was and still is very excited about the baby which makes you happy. You know your mother is too, being this will be her first grandchild; plus, she has never been as strict as your father is. Plus, the affair really calmed him down; if he wasn't guilty of anything then, you wouldn't be where you are now. Once dinner is finished, Namjoon walks in, setting his work boots next to the door and hanging his coat up as he always does every evening.
You ask each other how both of your days went and dig into your food the minute you have the table set. One thing about Namjoon is that he's an atheist. Of course, your father never knew even when he hired him, and Taehyung and you have kept that secret even to this day. Namjoon, though will not admit it, works on the Church grounds to provide for his mother and sister who live not that far from the church grounds. There's a lot of things your parents don't know for the sake of your sanity, and to protect Namjoon. Your father being the strict pastor he used to be; and possibly, still strict with the beliefs he is caught up in, would fire Namjoon if he were to know of Namjoon's beliefs. Of course, Namjoon also knows how you truly feel about the whole ordeal, and of course Namjoon swore to never tell your secret as well.
After making more small talk, silence follows, just the sound of clinking spoons against the both of your bowls of soup. A thought has remained on your mind for some time and even though you have never said it out loud, maybe it's time that you do. Namjoon has always opened up to Taehyung and you, even over things that you both would have never thought he'd open up to you two about. And ever since you've moved in the fellowship hall, it's as if Namjoon has caught your attention more than you'd like to admit. You always found him to be very handsome, quiet and hard-working; but now, it's like you learn something new about him every day.
With your spoon, you play at a piece of broccoli swimming in the broth before speaking, "They don't know," you say slowly, keeping your vision on the bowl in front of you. You can feel Namjoon's eyes on you, his expression probably showing confusion. "They don't know who the father is." Your eyes meet Namjoon's as guilt consumes you, "I won't tell them."
After a moment of searching your eyes, he slowly nods, showing a sense of understanding. "Besides, I'm surprised my father was lenient enough to let me live here." You admit, your eyes returning to look towards the bowl. "If he wasn't so guilty over the affair, I would be homeless."
"I wouldn't let that happen." Namjoon says suddenly. With wide eyes, you stare at him, your heart fluttering at the shock of his words. Speechless, the rest of the dinner continues in silence, your heart refusing to steady. The sixth month of pregnancy comes swiftly, your belly larger, your feet swelling, and your body aching in random places. Pregnancy cravings have been no joke either.
Namjoon has remained by your side; even tends to your pregnancy cravings whether it's at midnight or 3 AM. The second he sees your expression displaying discomfort at any point, he comes running with a heating pack and making sure you're comfortable before he heads out to continue yard maintenance. Even on nights you can't sleep, he holds your hand until your eyelids fight to stay open; days you need to go by the doctor for a checkup, Namjoon drives you there waiting in the work truck until you come back. With all he has been doing for you the past couple of months, it's like the feelings you have for him are continuing to grow even though that's not what you should be feeling. If your dad were to find out, it wouldn't be good for Namjoon. After everything, you want to protect him at all costs.
The night comes quickly it seems after a long day of attempting to clean, and before you know it, you have dinner set out on the table with some steaming chicken and rice. You hear the front door open, Namjoon steps in, the smell of the outdoors filling the wide-open space. There used to be rows of white tables and chairs spread along the building, but thankfully Namjoon moved them all into the shed except for maybe one table or two with a couple chairs.
"Hiya," You greet, trying to avoid the sudden pounding of your heart. Namjoon flashes a smile as he takes off his jacket and hangs it on the coat hanger next to the door. "How was your day?"
"It was good, thank you." Namjoon replies. You start to settle in your seat when Namjoon takes long strides until he makes it to you, a shy grin on his mouth. "How was yours?" He says, his right hand on the small of your back, the other holding your hand as he helps you into your seat.
Something in his eyes gives you a strange longing, but you brush it off inwardly trying to focus on the question he just asked you as he moves to settle in the chair across from you. The distance from you to the table due to your belly is something you've finally been growing used to; with a smirk, you reach for your fork and speak before you dig into your dinner, "It was good, and thank you.. For helping me."
"Anytime." The two of you hold eyes for a moment, heat rushing to your cheeks as you timidly return your eyes to your food. An awkward silence follows as Namjoon and you continue to eat. It's hard to make conversation sometimes especially when there's nothing really left to say. For a second, you feel Namjoon's eyes on you as if he wants to say something but decides against it.
You feel your baby kick against your abdomen, your hand instinctively moving to your stomach. Namjoon jumps at your gesture, his eyes wide as he stops mid-chew.
"It's okay," You chuckle, at his reaction. "The baby's just kicking." His reaction reminds you of the first time you ever felt your baby kick; it was like a weird flutter, hard to describe really. It was so unreal; it took you a second to realize that's exactly what the flutter was. Just your baby moving inside you.
Namjoon swallows the bite of food almost nervously, setting the silverware in his hand back on the napkin. "Here." You say softly, slowly starting to stand to your feet. Before you get the chance, Namjoon jumps from his chair, rounding the table, immediately reaching for your hand. Instead of relying on his strength to help you stand, you remain seated, moving his warm hand to the spot where the baby kicked a few minutes ago.
Namjoon kneels to level with you, his mouth slightly ajar as he waits. The second the baby kicks, an excited smile forms on his lips as he meets your eyes. You can't help but smile with tremendous joy at his reaction. As your hand continues resting above his, the two of you continue feeling the baby kick once more, your eyes never breaking contact. You realize how close Namjoon's face is to yours; the handsome curve of his chin, his dimples, his beautiful, brown eyes, and his genuine grin that always seems to make your heart melt. You've always seen something in him, but right now, you see him shining in an even brighter light.
Namjoon's lips then brush yours catching you in the sweetest surprise. Your hands find their way to his hair as he continues to kiss you; his hands move to rest on the chair you're sitting in as he leans more into the kiss. The feeling of admiration brings a smile to you as Namjoon moves his warm fingertips to your face, gently stroking your cheek with his thumb.
It's then you realize how long you have wanted to feel his kiss, how loving he is when he touches you, the surreal feeling of bliss beneath your chest, the jittery excitement you feel the second he walks in the room; his wide smile when you make him laugh, his constant presence the second he senses something may be wrong with you or the baby, his kind words whenever you need them, the encouragement to wake up every morning with the eagerness of your soon-to-be son or daughter you will one day hold in your arms; how hard working he is, his motivation to get the job done, his determination to protect you the way you are determined to protect him; his never ending support that you never realized you needed. In this moment, you don't care what anyone thinks. You are in love with Kim Namjoon.
** END OF FLASHBACK **
Your eyes flutter open as you take a long exhale, stretching your arms above your head. It's pitch black beyond your bedroom window and you furrow your eyebrows in frustration. You didn't mean to sleep as long as you just did, but gathering yourself, you cautiously sit up, performing your 'daily routine' of scooting to the bedpost to help you to your feet. Carefully you walk to the restroom to tinkle, then brushing your teeth and rinsing with mouth wash.
Quickly looking at a wall clock as you exit the bathroom, you notice it's 7:00pm; Namjoon should be in from work even though you inwardly feel horrible for not having dinner ready for him like you typically do. It's eerily quiet you notice, and you pause seeing the light on in the main area. Okay, so maybe Namjoon is here? You wonder. Rounding the infamous corner that leads to accidental body train wrecks, you freeze in place.
"SURPRISE!!!!!" The sudden outburst nearly knocks you off your feet; but thankfully instead, your hand flies to your chest as your eyes widen into baseballs.
There standing in front of you is none other than your long-lost best friend, Kim Taehyung, and Kim Namjoon.
"Wha-?" You can barely speak, the shock sending you into a slight reel of light headiness. Numerous pink and blue balloons are floating to the top of the ceiling; two tables, one with a pink tablecloth and the other a blue tablecloth, sit off to the side decorated with a cake and a few gifts. Tears well in your eyes as Tae's boxy smile fills his face. As much as you want to run in Taehyung's arms, you start taking swift steps forward; he meets you halfway and envelops you in a warm embrace.
"Wow, look at you!" He chuckles, his deep voice bringing you comfort. Taehyung steps back and gestures towards your stomach. "Your belly is huge!"
Namjoon steps forward, his dimples showing in his wide smile as he squeezes Taehyung's shoulder. You speak, "I know, I can't believe how fast this pregnancy is flying by!"
Taehyung's loose, fiery red hair lays on his head as it did months ago, his smile never fading as his brown eyes hold tears. You pull him into another hug; after a moment, pulling away your arms remain linked with his. "Your father let you come?" You then ask, concern filling you.
"Well, no." He admits. "I told him Namjoon and I were going to a basketball game."
Laughter fills you because of course Taehyung would do that, "You sly fox," You tease as he
quickly pecks your forehead. "You know you love me," He winks. Namjoon and Tae moving to either side of you, grab your hands and lead you to a chair next to the table with the gifts settled on it. Joy overwhelms you as tears of gratitude spill onto your cheeks once more.
"You guys didn't have to do this." You say, wiping the tears off your face. "What did I do to deserve the two of you?"
Namjoon never let go of your hand, his thumb gently caressing it, "Taehyung mentioned how when you were kids how you loved surprises especially if it involved a small party of some sort so," Namjoon nods toward Taehyung, "And I knew how much you missed him, too. I just wanted to do something to celebrate you. And, the baby."
"Thank you. Thank you so much to both of you." You cry, your hands still wiping at your cheeks. As if Namjoon reads your mind, he leans in and kisses you sweetly, but only for a few seconds.
"You two are on kissing terms again?" Taehyung teases once you and Namjoon pull away.
You stick your tongue out at him, "Oh, be quiet." You say goofily, the smell of the cake meeting your nose as Taehyung begins to cut it.
"Don't cut it unevenly." Namjoon jokes, Taehyung shooting him an annoyed look.
"Maybe we should have let [Y/N] open presents first."
By the end of the night, icing had met all three of your faces; some getting into Taehyung's red hair, some swiped across Namjoon's neck, and some on your eyebrows and possibly up your nose. The endless laughter, the spontaneous jokes, the wrapping paper from your gifts sprawled out across the ground. If there is anything, you will forever be grateful for, it's for your best friend in the whole world, and the beautiful man you have fallen in love with all over again.
Little do they know, within the past months after finding out that you were pregnant, they both mended your broken heart and put it back together. You don't know where you'd be without them. As the three of you begin cleaning the fellowship hall, you boxing the cake and putting it in the fridge, you can't help but smile. The idea hits you suddenly, and tears fill your eyes.
After scolding yourself for so long for not thinking hard on the subject,
right here, standing in the kitchen after a wonderful evening,
you finally have a name picked out for your little one.
****
2 months later...
"Namjoon, I'll be fine," You assure him, as he rests his hands on your sides. Concern clouds his expression. "Namjoon, I'm not due until next week."
"I know, but still," He kisses you quickly, "I'm still worried."
"No need, I'll be fine." You smile. The two of you have run out of groceries, and to make sure you both have everything you need before the baby arrives, you asked Namjoon if he could run by the grocery store that's only minutes away. "You'll be back before you know it."
"Okay," Namjoon kisses you once more, your head spinning once he pulls away. He turns to open the front door, but pauses returning to look at you, "I love you." He says. Warmth fills your chest at his words. "I love you, too." You whisper. With one last smile, Namjoon leaves, shutting the door behind him. You turn to waddle towards the kitchen, just to clean whatever you can and maybe begin cooking lunch. You hospital bag is already packed for next week because you like to be prepared sometimes, so that's one less worry. Also, Namjoon and you already have a game plan set for whenever it's time for the trip to the hospital, so once next week rolls around you both already know what to do. Before you make it to the kitchen, you feel a slight ache in your abdomen.
"Oh," You groan, caressing the hurting area. "Maybe I should just go lay down for a bit." You decide instead of cooking. Waddling toward your bedroom, near your bed, stands a cradle
Namjoon built and surprised you with a few weeks ago; nestled in the corner of the crib sits a little heart shaped plush character Taehyung had given you at the baby shower. Next to the heart plush sits a koala plush that Namjoon had given you as well. Whoever your little one is, you know he/she will love these little plushies just as much as you do.
And, your baby will be lucky enough to get to know his/her uncle Taehyung and his/her-
The sharp pain returns causing you to cringe as you lean against your bed post. It takes you a moment to recover as you straighten yourself. Suddenly, before you can even process what's happening, a gush of water flows out of you soaking the carpet along with your feet.
"No, no, no, no," You panic, your eyes frantically search the room for your phone. Namjoon just left, but he probably hasn't had a chance to look at the groceries, and though it's your first pregnancy, one thing you do know is, once the water breaks, the baby needs to be out as soon as possible.
Your phone is nowhere in sight as you try to move swiftly, your hands patting at your bed, the furniture, all the while you're trying to remember where you set it. You turn to head to the bathroom, another sharp pain taking over as you lean against the wall. Gasping, you try to endure the discomfort, your aching body trying to stay strong as you look along the bathroom sink to see if you happened to leave your phone there.
With no luck and leaving a water trail behind you with every step you take, you try to make it to the kitchen, the pain so unbearable you can barely think straight. "Gosh, where did I put it?" You choke, slowly but surely reaching the kitchen. Your phone lays on the counter top where you must have left it this morning after making breakfast. With shaking fingers, you unlock your phone trying to pull Namjoon's number up.
"Agh!" Another contraction surges through you, your hand squeezing your phone unintentionally. "Holy Shiva." You grimace, trying to force yourself to focus on the task at hand. You manage to get the phone ringing, Namjoon picks up after the first ring.
"Hello?" He answers.
"Namjoon, it's time." You say.
"Ohhh, shit!" Namjoon says as soon as the realization hits him. "Hold on tight, I'm on my way, just hold tight, I'm coming!"
*FLASHBACK*
Your father introduced you to him unintentionally. You just happened to run by the church that day to drop off the keys to the work truck. "[Y/N], this is Kim Namjoon. He's going to be taking care of the church grounds for us, isn't God good?" Your dad said.
"Hello, it's nice to meet you." You greet, holding your hand out, Namjoon shaking it gently.
"It's nice to meet you too, Ma'am," Namjoon replies politely. Your father then shows him around, your eyes curiously gazing at the back of the tall boy. He wore a black turtle neck with a green, denim jacket over it. A black hat covered his brown hair, and his dark, blue jeans complimented his long legs as well as a nice pair of brown sperries. He's definitely attractive you remembered thinking, and something in you wanted to get to know him.
*END OF FLASHBACK*
Namjoon bursts through the door, "[Y/N], I'm here! Baby, I'm right here." Namjoon throws his arm around you as he helps you to the work truck, thrusting the door open and lifting you into the seat. "I'm going to grab the hospital bag, I'll be right back." You nod as tears flow down your face, the pain waving through you once again. As soon as Namjoon retrieves the bag, he bursts into the seat of the driver's side, and slams on the gas pedal as soon as he gets the truck started.
*FLASHBACK*
Any opportunity you had, you were trying to get to know Namjoon. It took him a while to warm up to you, but you were too determined to be his friend that you weren't going to give up that easily. Namjoon, you believe, picked up on that after a while, especially after annoying him every time he was sawing wood in preparation for the shed your dad asked him to build. Even when Namjoon was building the swing set, you made sure you were right there, talking to him nonstop until he acknowledged you.
You would call Taehyung after every encounter updating him about the boy you were having a hard time cracking. "Come help me." You pled, hearing Taehyung's sigh over the phone.
"You are so annoying." He teased.
"You know you love me," You gloated. With defeat, Taehyung joined you, even bringing a basketball along just in case if Namjoon happened to be into sports. Luna and Jo knew of your undying crush on Namjoon because they even noticed the determination you had.
"He doesn't even come to the services." Jo whined, "Don't you think it'd be best to get to know someone that's more active in the church?"
You rolled your eyes, "I'll catch you later."
*END OF FLASHBACK*
Namjoon swerves past cars on the highway, both hands on the wheel. "We're almost there [Y/N], we're almost there!"
You grip at the bar above you, your other hand on your abdomen. The pain is never ending, and it's like you barely have gotten the chance to breathe. All you know is you want your baby out; the anticipation of holding him or her in your arms is the only thing other than Namjoon that's keeping you sane right now.
"Just a few more miles, we will be there. Just breathe," Namjoon's voice is shaky as he keeps his frantic, wide eyes on the road.
"GAH!" You lean forward, a contraction hitting you once again.
*FLASHBACK*
"You guys aren't going to stop until I'm your friend, am I right?" Namjoon held the basketball to his chest as Tae jumped around in front of him, his arms wide open in preparation of keeping the ball from flying into the basketball net.
"Damn straight." You said. Namjoon's eyes widened in surprise when he heard you curse.
"I thought church girls were the good ones." He joked.
"Nope," You put emphasis on the 'p.' "Now hurry up. If you win, I will leave you alone for good. If TaeTae wins then we treat you to dinner and a movie. Algesseo?"
Namjoon smirked "Okay." Swiftly he turned, thrusting the ball toward the hoop. The basketball hit the ring, and right when your heart began to sink; instead, a sigh of relief filled you the second the basketball avoided the net and landed in Taehyung's arms.
"HAH!" You rejoiced, Namjoon shaking his head with a hint of a smile on his lips. "Looks like it's going to be a burger and fries kind of night." You winked.
*END OF FLASHBACK*
Namjoon turns with a purpose into the parking lot of the hospital. Once he parks, he jumps out of the truck, running to the passenger side, lifting you out of the truck and carefully placing you steadily on your feet. He throws the hospital bag over his shoulder as he quickly locks the truck, then places his arms around you. "It's okay. It's okay." He comforts you as he leads you to the hospital entrance. You try to speak between sniffles as you both enter the hospital, but all that leaves your lips are small whimpers. Everything becomes a blur as a male nurse with black hair approaches you with a wheelchair. His name tag reads Park Jimin, and he helps Namjoon settle you into the chair. As he rolls you into a hospital room, a female nurse by the name of Monnie helps you change into a nightgown, then hooks you up to what seems like a million machines whilst trying to make you as comfortable as possible.
Namjoon grips your hand as Jimin sets a chair next to the bed for Namjoon to sit in. The next thing you know, a tall man walks in already dawned in a scrub hat, mouth mask, and gloves.
"Hello, I am Doctor Kim Seokjin, Doctor Jung Hoseok was called into an emergency surgery, so I will be the one to help deliver your baby today." You nod quickly, the contractions growing unbearable by the second. "Alright, I am going to check your dilation, just breathe in and out." After a few moments, you squeeze your eyes shut, still gripping onto Namjoon's hand for dear life. "Alright, she is dilated 3cm; once you are at 10cm, we will begin pushing.
No worries, I will alert you as soon as I need you to start pushing."
Four nurses rush to your side, making sure everything is set. You glimpse at their name tags to the best of your ability, recognizing Jimin and Monnie to be in the mix. The two other male nurses are Jeon Jungkook and Min Yoongi.
"Taehyung.. And, my mom." You say between breaths. "My-my dad. My sibling.""No worries baby, they're coming." Namjoon says softly, planting a sweet kiss on your forehead.
*FLASHBACK*
After that day at the basketball hoop, Namjoon, Taehyung and you became very close. That's when you and Taehyung learned of Namjoon's atheism as well as him caring for his mother and his sister.
"My dad was never really in the picture," Namjoon said one day finishing up the final paint to the shed. It had been six months since he had been hired, and he finally was opening up to you two about his life before coming here to Oak Park. "Don't really know too much about him. Thankfully your dad gave me a work truck and a place to live to work here. Now, I can afford the rent for the house my mom and sister live in."
It's crazy how much you could learn about an individual. The way they talk, the way they walk, their mannerisms, their past, what they want for the future, etc. You'll never forget the day you first kissed Namjoon. The two of you were just leaning against a mini, red monkey bar; there was no denying the feelings you had for him, and you knew he felt the same about you, especially with the way he held your gaze.
You had never really been kissed before. Taehyung and you did on a dare one time and it was only for a second. Of course, someone, Jo to be exact, blabbed to your parents which resulted in Taehyung and you getting grounded for a whole month. Taehyung and you never kissed anyone again after that point. Except, for you. Right now. You remember leaning in, Namjoon meeting halfway until your lips touched. Warm and inviting, he wrapped his arms around you as you wrapped yours around his neck, his lips moved with yours so perfectly as he pressed his body even closer to you.
*END OF FLASHBACK*
The hours drag as the pain grows even more. You used to believe strongly in epidurals and even though the thought of being painless sounds quite heavenly at a time like this, you still decide to tough it out until the end. Doctor Kim Seokjin checks your dilation once more; Namjoon rests his head against your forehead, exhaustion in his expression.
"10cm. Alright, [Y/N], your baby's coming. When I say push, you push. Okay." The doctor positions himself in preparation for the arrival of your baby. "One, two, three, push!"
"AGH!" You grunt, a small scream escapes the back of your throat as you push with every fiber of strength in your body. "Breathe, breathe." Namjoon lets you grip his hand; you can feel the sweat pouring from your forehead as the unspeakable pain ignites throughout your body.
"Is she here?" The click of heels captures your attention once you're finished with the first push. "Oh honey, I'm here!" Your mother, your younger sibling, as well as the shiny red hair of Taehyung rushes to the other side of the hospital bed, your mom brushing your hair from your face as she kisses your forehead. You want to ask where your dad is, but before you have the chance the doctor shouts, "Push!"
"AAAAAAAGH!" You wail as you manage to push once more with all your might. Taehyung grabs your other hand, alarm in his features at the sight of his best friend in so much pain.
"You can- you can do it!" The nurse Min Yoongi encourages as he rushes around the room to check the machines to make sure everything is still functioning properly.
After the second push, pain still erupting, you look over at your mother, "I'm- I'm so glad you're here." After another sixty to sixty-five seconds, the doctor's voice takes over, "Push!"
*FLASHBACK*
Namjoon's fingers traced the outline of your body; warm and careful as if you were fragile. His kiss captivated you; gentle and emotional as if you were the only girl in the world. A whole year after knowing each other finally lead to a beautiful night like this. Namjoon held you close as you wrapped your arms around him enjoying the heat of his skin on your own. Running your hands through his hair, you hungrily kissed him as if it was your last day on earth. You never wanted him to let you go, not even for a second.
The two of you became one for the first time that night.
*END OF FLASHBACK*
"Alright, one more! Almost done! Push!"
Breathing in one long inhale, with a loud scream, you push with all you have left in you. Sudden relief takes over your body as pure exhaustion rises. The sound of a baby crying echoes in the room. With gloomy eyes, you look over to see your mother with tears running down her face and onto her hand that's covering her agape mouth as her eyes stay locked in front of her. Taehyung's eyes along with your sibling's are wide as they look in the direction of the crying infant. Groggily, you turn to look at the father of your child, Kim Namjoon, as he rises slowly from his seat, his warm hand still in yours. When you finally get the strength to look in front of you, slowly sitting yourself up, you make eye contact with Doctor Kim Seokjin. You can see the smile in his eyes though he's wearing a mouth mask, "It's a girl."
"Oh," You breathe as tears trickle down your face. Your eyes land on your baby girl as she's crying.
"Sir, would you like to do the honors?" The doctor hands a pair of scissors to Namjoon to cut the both of your daughter's umbilical cord.
"Wait," Your mom says, realization hitting her. She looks at you with wide eyes, "Is- is?"
Right then your father walks in, his mouth ajar as the sudden tension fills the room. Taehyung's shoulders stiffen at the sight of him, but he keeps his lips sealed. The sudden fear of your dad finding out the truth vacates you when you know Namjoon, Taehyung and you can conquer anything.
"Yes," You say as bravery takes over you, your eyes connecting with your dad's although your mom's stare never leaves you. "Namjoon is the father." You turn to Namjoon, tears still flooding your face. He's crying too as you both share a knowing look. You nod for Namjoon to continue towards your daughter to cut the umbilical cord. Taehyung and your mother pull out their phones to take pictures not wanting to miss a single moment regardless of your father's arrival; Namjoon cuts the umbilical cord, turning to hand the scissors to the doctor. You watch Namjoon as he caresses his daughter's cheek, his smile never leaving him as endless joy fills your soul. The nurses then rush to clean her off and to quickly weigh her soon wrapping her in a soft, pink blanket.
"She is 7 pounds and 5 ounces." The nurse Jungkook speaks.
Your father stands off to the side, his chin quivers as his eyes never leave your beautiful daughter. "Are you ready to hold her?" Monnie asks, her kind grin meeting her eyes.
"Yes." You choke back a sob, "I want to hold her."
Monnie gently places you and Namjoon's daughter into your arms, Namjoon returning to his seat beside you. You stare at her small face, her eyes closed as she puckers her tiny lips. Her skin so smooth underneath your fingertips as you caress her cheek. "She's so perfect." You breathe.
"Just like you." Namjoon whispers. When you both make eye contact, you kiss him. Your love for him as powerful as it has ever been.
"I love you." You whisper.
"I love you." He says.
"Uh," A deep voice sounds. You look to see a now smiling Taehyung, "So, um, as the Uncle, I must ask," The room chuckles as Taehyung raises his index finger, "What's her name?"
"Ah," You say. Your mother squeezes your shoulder as your sibling gives you a sweet nod; Namjoon stares at you with adoration; and your father steps closer with his hands in his pockets, the two of you sharing a small smile. You return your eyes to Taehyung.
"Taejun." You look back at the little bundle of joy in your arms, her eyes slightly open as a tiny smile forms on her lips, "Her name is Kim Taejun."
