A/N- We made it. We are finally here.

First and foremost, I really hope you enjoy this. I had fun writing this. It was a huge challenge and I think I did pretty darn well. Again, I apologize in advance. Thinking long and hard, I decided to keep the old ideas I had and figured out a way to incorporate the new ideas in this.

I’m proud of myself. I thought I would never get this far tbh. It’s been an intense slow burn journey. I’ll admit, this is the chapter that has made me extremely nervous. I feel like this is a very crucial part of the story and I want to create it right and make it look satisfying in my eyes without dwelling on if it’s realistic or not. This chapter has been finished a while ago but I just kept rereading it and tried to figure out if I should add something or delete something, putting it off. But I dunno what else to do for this so I might as well post it instead of keeping you all waiting.

I know this is high-key overdue. I’m sorry for making you wait but I truly hope that you look forward to what Jen will do and what’s to come. If you don’t like it, hey, to each his own. It’s all good but I love this and I’m going to continue doing what I’m doing <3
Been trying to think outside the box for this and I like what I wrote. We can’t please everyone with our writing but as long as the writer likes it, that should be all that matters. I changed so much, deleted a lot of things, and came up with this, so I’m satisfied. Happy reading :)

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Finally knocking, the anticipation killed him as he anxiously waited for her to open the door.

He was ready.

No turning back, no regrets. Confess and leave, that was the plan. Nothing more, nothing less.

At least that was what he thought would happen tonight.

From Jimin and Taehyung’s words about getting carried away, Jungkook didn’t think he would. But being alone in a room with Jennie after telling her his feelings could lead to some tension. He hoped that it won’t be anything bad and she’ll take his words well.

He had a lot of negative thoughts on how she would react. If she would feel awkward and say that she didn’t feel the same or if she likes someone else but Jungkook needed to push through.

This has been building for so long, that he was beginning to wonder if his hyungs’ words were true. Was he going to be able to go by his plan or let his actions speak louder than his words?

Once the door opens, his heart skipped a beat when he was greeted by that smile he always loved. Her hair was in a messy bun, giving him another urge to take it out so her hair could fall down. He noticed that she was on her phone, speaking to a friend as she lets him in. He also regarded that she was already dressed and ready to leave soon to the airport.

“Yeah, we’ll definitely have that sleepover soon,” she speaks in her native tongue while Jungkook shuts the door behind him. “Hey, Amber, I’ll call you when I’m back home, all right? Love you girl!”

After hanging up, she turns around, smiling brightly. “Kook! I’m happy to see you!”

“I’m uh…happy to see you, too.” he smiles awkwardly. “You forgot your lotion.”

“Ah! I was looking for this! Thank you!” she takes it and packs it in her bag. Jungkook watches her and smiles softly as she rambles, “I love me some cocoa butter. I would’ve been so upset if I forgot it. Ah…I can’t wait to go home. It’s nothing like going back home to see your family and friends, right? I’m very fortunate that Big Hit allowed this. It’s going to be pretty busy. A little interview with Billboard and hanging with JRE, I’m super excited. BTS is really moving up and getting that exposure. I believe 2016 will be a great year for us.”

“Yeah...I believe so too.”

“So, what’s up?” she faces him with a smile.

“I uh, wanted to see you.”

“You saw me.” she teases. “Came here to game before I leave? I think Tae has the Wii U. I’m sure we can play one quick round.”

She always made time for him and never complained. It was something he always appreciated.

Jungkook shakes his head and sniffs. “No, not right now. I wanted to speak with you.”

“All right. What is it?”

“There’s something that I uh, wanted to tell you for a while, now. Something I wanted you to hear at least once from me, personally.”

“Spit it out, don’t keep me in suspense.” she grins. Jennie couldn’t help but notice him looking a little off and her face slowly changed to concern. “Hey…you good?”

Jungkook tilts his head to the side before rubbing the back of his neck. “Th-there’s something that I’ve been trying to tell you for a long time now,”

His nervousness came back at the worst time. He was already stumbling over his words. He needed to keep himself composed and not mess this opportunity up.

“There’s that look again,” she calls out. “Just like when I told you that you looked like you needed to say something important. What do you need to tell me? You know you can tell me anything.”

“I-I know but this has been harder than I thought it would be. And I know you’re about to leave and this is going to be terrible timing but…” he exhales and shakes his head. “But I won't chicken out, anymore. No more getting nervous. I need to say what I need to say to you...I can’t bear to let you hear this from someone other than me when almost everyone knows but you."

"What are you talking about?"

"I was wondering when I'd be man enough to finally tell you how I feel...about us. Our friendship. Everything. I know this isn't going to be perfect or like I planned out in my head countless times but I can't hold this in, anymore. I've watched from afar for too long and I can't help but think if I don't say this now, I'll be too late." he pauses, letting out a shaky breath. "What I'm about to tell you is going to be extremely selfish. But I need you to know."

He was acting so weird, just what was the problem?

“Kook, I think you’re freaking out over nothing. What can you possibly say to me that is making you this nervous? Just say it.” she chuckles lightly, trying to lighten the mood.

Jungkook hesitates, glancing down at his feet. Jennie, deciding not to pry, patiently waited for him to speak again. Whatever was on his mind, was clearly serious.

Before he knew it, the words slip out of his mouth as he meets her gaze.

“I can’t think of you as a friend, anymore.”

Like he predicted, her face slowly fell and her lips part in shock. The entire room went silent as he watched her try to comprehend what he just told her. It felt like minutes went past before he eventually heard her speak.

Furrowing her eyebrows, she stutters, “Wh-what?”

“I can’t think of you as a friend, anymore,” he repeats.

“What?” she responds incredulously.

“I can’t…see myself as just your friend.”

She stares at him in dismay. “I-I think Jimin and Taehyung hit you a little too hard while you were play fighting-“

“My mind is here and made up. I don’t want to just be friends, anymore, Jennie.”

She stares at him, puzzled. “I-I don’t understand…why?”

“Because I…I want more than what we have.” he murmurs softly.

"Kook..." she warns, slowly shaking her head. "...don't go there..."

"I need to go there," he responds. “We’re not kids, anymore. I can’t just stand here while other guys are considering asking out the girl that I want to be mine. I can’t just stand here and not tell you how much I want you. I can’t just stand here and not say how you make me feel.”

Jennie’s stomach had dropped as soon as he said that. She had been trying to avoid any type of feelings for him for months. She thought she managed to get over them but now he comes by and says this to her, screwing up those plans? Taking her off guard and he says this when she is minutes away from going to the airport?

“Don’t play with me,” she murmurs in a tight, shaky voice, waiting for him to say that this was a prank.

He was not going to do this to her like this. Not when she was about to leave. He was not going to drop this on her, right now. This wasn’t funny. As she waited, that same serious expression was on his face and she realized that he wasn’t joking.

“Kook?” she calls out nervously as he kept his head up high. “Kook...don’t do this…you have no idea how much our bond means to me,”

“I’m fully aware.”

“You’re fully aware? Then why are you...why are you...Kook we...I...” she hesitates and looks away. “We can’t-”

“Don’t do that.” he interrupts softly.

“…do this…this shouldn’t happen, Kook.”

“Is that your doubts in your head or your heart speaking?” he questions firmly. “I’ve been observing you for the last couple of months. And thinking back to the day we kissed under that mistletoe…how you act around me ever since you told me you had a weird dream about a friend…how you were looking at me during Season’s Greetings...how jealous you were when we went to the costume store in America and those girls were flirting with me...how you act with me compared to other guys, it just makes me believe that this isn’t one-sided. And it kind of makes me think that you want me just as much as I want you. Maybe deep down…you want me more than you think.”

She couldn’t bring herself to reply to that, tongue-tied as she averts her eyes. It was like he just punched the wall she was trying to hold up between them. She couldn’t even look at him as she tried to be in denial about everything.

But was he right? Did she want him just as much, if not more than him? After all this time?
Jungkook noticed that she hadn’t disregarded anything he had said, and it gave him the confidence to continue to speak.

“Your heart is racing, isn’t it? You’re feeling all these crazy emotions? You feel confused? Maybe a little scared? I’m feeling that way, too. It’s weird, I know. I thought this was a little crush and I'd get over it after a few weeks, but no. My feelings for you have only gotten stronger.” he goes on. “Do you have any idea how you make me feel? Do you have any idea how much I am…deeply in love with you?”

‘Jungkook...’ she thought, overwhelmed as tears begin to develop in her eyes.

It was like she couldn’t even breathe. How can he be in love with her? Why? Why her?

“Every day I beat myself up for taking this long to finally tell someone as special as you that I want you to be mine. I want to kiss you. I want to cuddle with you. I want to take my time with you and show you how wanted and amazing you are. I want to go on dates with you. I want to have arguments with you and work through them together. I want to wear matching outfits with you, surprise you with smarties. I want to see you in my white shirts and other clothes that are clearly too big for you but you would make them look cute.”

The tears streamed down her face and she quickly wipes them away. Why did he have to say this now when she is about to leave? She wanted him to stop.

“I want to be as cheesy as we can possibly be together, and I even want you to be my Pepper Pots while I am your Tony Stark. And as much as I love Tony…I’ll even be your Captain America if you asked me to. But as long as you promise me that you’ll dress up as Iron Man, one day. I can see your reaction now, the cutest thing.” he chuckles at the thought, glancing at the floor for a moment.

Looking back up, he adds, “And the smiles that you give me are the cutest thing I ever seen. I even get a little jealous when you smile that way with other guys because I want that specific smile all to myself.”

‘Kook...please...’ she begged in her head. She wanted to get out of the room because everything that he was telling her began to overwhelm her and it was too much for her heart to handle.

“You have this…adorable habit of scrunching your nose which I love. Your eyes sparkle when someone mentions smarties, Ailee or Captain America, too. And I meant what I said back when we ate lamb skewers for the first time. Your skin is beautiful. Always. And as I see us dating, I think about the play fights we’ll have together. The debates about Iron Man and Captain America. And I know it was me you were dreaming about.”

That prompted her to stare at him in alarm. How’d he find out? Was it her body language? Did she make it that obvious? But like he said, he’s been observing her for a while, putting the puzzle pieces together. She felt her cheeks flush at the dream she had tried to put behind her.

“I have those dreams about you, too,” he admits as she proceeded to look at him in disbelief. “You were who I was talking about when we spoke about the dream in your studio. You were the one I was thinking about when I said that she’ll know I’m far from being a baby behind closed doors. So, when we get serious and when we are ready...I want to be your first in other ways besides being your first boyfriend. Showing you what I’m capable of. Showing you how special you are to me. Only if you’d let me.”

‘Give me the strength...’ she thought while exhaling as his words stuck in her head.

He could probably get any woman he wanted. There were so many women here who were head over heels for him. But come to find out he only wants her? And after this time she finds this out?

“I even want to act dorky together, show you memes and play video games with you, too," he adds. "All of this, and more that I want to do, not as your friend. But your boyfriend. As the guy that is in love with you."

He slowly approaches her and grabs her hands, holding them as he gazes down at her with teary eyes.

"Every time I see you, do you have any idea how hard it is to not kiss you? That seeing you smile makes my day 100 times better? Do you realize how happy I get when I am the one that brings that cute smile on your face? How jealous I get when guys give you more attention than usual and I have more competition?”

It bothered her that seeing him gaze at her like this made her heart flutter. That her skin felt hot as he held her hands in a gentle manner. This was too much to take.

“I can’t even explain it but you just make me so happy when I’m with you. I feel like myself when I’m with you. I never feel awkward around you, you always make me feel so comfortable.” he goes on. “You have never judged or discouraged me. You always encourage me and never gave up on me no matter how much I become frustrated when I don’t sing like I want to or when I don’t dance like I want to. You are always there. It's always been you. It's insane how one person can make you so happy and bring such joy to your heart. And that person that does that to me is you.”

After a moment of silence, he squeezes her hands, murmuring, “Please…talk to me. Say something.”

She hesitates and releases his hands. Turning around, she walks away from him to collect her thoughts.

What did he expect her to say?

Not every day your best friend shows up out of the blue and pours their heart out to you.

The tension started to become too much for her as her emotions were all over the place. The atmosphere, being alone in the room with him, she didn’t know how much more she could take.

Turning around, she speaks, “I am about to go home and you really are going to tell me this, now?”

“Yes.”

“Now? What are you doing?”

“Something I should’ve done a long time ago.”

“I…I don’t…understand, I just…you can't just...you…you can't just say things like that. You can’t just say things like that when you know I am about to leave."

“I just did,” he responds softly. “I meant every word and I’m not taking it back. I’m sorry I waited this long but I needed you to hear it just once. Bad timing and all.”

“And what about the fans? I really don’t want to be the cause of us losing fans. Backlash and all, I don’t want to put you through that mess. I don’t want to put you through that stress. All that drama on Bangtan and Big Hit, let’s just…” she exhales shakily and blinks her tears away. “L-look, I really think that we should just stay professional, okay? So just…please…”

“With you being alone with me in this room and the way you are looking at me, I doubt you just want to stay professional.” Jungkook catches her in her explanation as she avoids eye contact yet again.

He caught her red handed. She couldn’t deny it, he saw right through it. Jennie wanted to kick herself for how obvious her nervousness was becoming as he called her out on everything.

“I know you want to avoid any type of drama but me loving you is not your fault. It’s no one’s fault. You deserve all the love you’re getting.” he declares. “And those fans we’ll lose are not real fans of Bangtan. Just closed-minded people. I want to do what makes me happy. Being around you makes me happy and making you mine will make me happy. Only if you’d let me.”

The tension was starting to become unbearable for Jennie. She needed to get out of this room, ASAP. The way he was looking at her, the way she tried not to glance at his lips, the way he looked so attractive in that white shirt of his, everything made her want to do something that she felt like she shouldn’t.

He was so persistent. Why couldn’t he had just left her alone after she said to stay professional. She was desperately losing the battle to resist these feelings.

“You really want to go through all of that? All for me? What if you regret it?“ she asks. “Dating me. I always used to think about that when it came to dating here. Like if someone would still want to hold my hand in public or if they would feel embarrassed to be seen with me because of who I am. Because I’m not their ideal type in this area. And then some of my family members are always nagging about when I’ll date a black guy and stay within my race but it’s like...it’s just...it’s overwhelming and annoying. It could be a whole mess if something goes wrong.”

“It won’t be a mess with you and I. No more ifs when it comes to us. Being in love with you has been my biggest contentment. I have no regrets when it comes to you and I never will when you become mine.” he says.

‘Why is he making this harder for me?’ she thought.

Jungkook could see that she was about to crack. She couldn’t dodge this forever. The way she was looking at him, he knew and based on their heightened emotions, she could snap before he does. He was so close to snapping himself as he kept glancing at her lips.

“Just…just give me one…one good reason why I shouldn’t just kiss you, right now and show you how I feel.” he courageously asks.

His bold statement caused her to widen her eyes with her face flushed.

Kiss?
What kiss?
That wasn’t part of the conversation.

He had to be bluffing. No way he would be this bold, right?

She lets out a nervous chuckle, “Kook, look, we…we’re in a group. We work together.”

“I said good reason.”

“Look-we…it’s…I…” she trails off.

Crossing her arms, she shakes her head, feeling frustrated at how he was winning this conversation. She couldn’t even think of any valid reasons. She was right where he wanted her and it was only a matter of time before she was unable to resist. The wall she had between them was cracking fast. One more punch and the wall will break.

Truth be told, she couldn’t find a good reason. Maybe she was just scared on the inside as she thought about the what ifs and the idea of being exposed and giving someone her heart.

Would it work? Him and her together? Dating her best friend? Would anything change if they date? Will they be able to keep things on the low, to make sure the public does not know about them? And if their relationship does leak, will they remain strong against any public hate?

“Jennie, I am not letting anyone change my mind on how I feel about you. No media, no ARMY, no one will change how I feel. And if ARMY really loves Bangtan like they always say, they will accept that I love you and support us. I refuse to let anything, or anybody try to take what we have. A relationship is between two people. I want a relationship with just you and me. No media, no rumors, no negativity, none of that but just us. I’ve seen so many couples get ruined because of that and I refuse to let our relationship follow that path. I love you too much to let something like that take you away from me.”

That was love right there. Jen couldn’t deny that. Everything he had said was something that she had always wanted. This was real.

“This was what you meant...this was what you wanted to tell me that would change our friendship. All this time…it was me,” she confirms, turning her back to him. “All those talks we had…all those comments that I remember you saying…the random stares I get from other idols when you are around me…those weird feelings I get when we get so close…all because of this. What are you doing to me? Why? Just…”

Watching her, he begins to slowly make his way to her, step by step. He heard her stop rambling and felt her tremble when his firm chest was against her back. Her hair clip fell on the floor as her hair fell down after he removed it.

As he slowly wrapped his arms around her, looking down at her, Jen’s heart rate quickened. She felt a sense of security in his arms and even though she enjoyed being like this, her mind continued to have an endless battle between staying in his arms or escaping.

“You can’t think of a good reason, can you?” he asks.

Jen thought her rambling would somehow change the subject but Jungkook knew better. She thought he was bluffing about kissing and wasn’t going to do anything at all.

‘Don’t turn around...’ she thought.

But after he said her name against her ear, it was game over because her body reacted on its own by turning around to look up at him. Before she could get a word in, he gently cups her face and kisses her sweetly like he had something to prove. His nose had bumped into hers and he tilts his head to the side while his soft lips caught her by surprise.

Unable to fight it any more, she gave in, kissing back as she closed her eyes.

It was like Jungkook became a new person. He couldn’t control himself, he had to kiss her. He wasn’t that little boy, anymore. He was bent on letting her know that he loved and wanted her.

As much as Jen was enjoying this, her mind continued to go crazy with various thoughts.
‘I shouldn’t be doing this…but this feels right…but he’s my best friend…but his lips feel so right on mine…but we’ve been friends for so long…but maybe this was meant to be…why is this happening…why don’t I want to this end.’

He feels her slowly pull away, placing her hands on his chest. She still seemed conflicted. Deliberately, she runs her hands down his chest as he watched her get lost in her thoughts.
Snapping back into reality, she steps back. “Kook...we really shouldn’t be doing this,”

Jungkook raises a brow. Her voice didn’t sound like she wanted to stop. Observing her also confirmed it. So, he simply asked her huskily,

“Do you really mean that?”

When he saw that she couldn’t say yes, he firmly grabs her hips and pulls her against him. She let out a gasp before being silenced by his lips as they kissed repeatedly.

She felt everything that he was feeling while she wrapped her arms around his neck, letting him show her how he felt. As the kiss intensified, she left out a soft moan. He was so gentle as he caressed her, making her shiver. She felt like she was high as her heart proceeded to pound.

This just wasn’t fair. After all this time of trying to avoid this, she found herself in his arms. But her heart didn’t want to be anywhere else.

After pulling away, Jungkook soon looked down and shook his head. “I’m sorry, I got carried away.”

Part of him felt guilty for going this far. He didn’t mean to kiss her so suddenly. He didn’t mean to kiss her at all. That was not a part of the plan tonight. He just wanted to confess and leave but his heart had other plans. Something in him just couldn’t let her leave without showing her how he felt.

Was this what his hyungs meant? Emotions will run high and you’ll get carried away?

“I guess I just ruined our friendship, huh?” he adds sadly in a low voice. “I’m so stupid…what was I thinking?”

Abruptly, Jennie grabs him by the hand when he was about to turn around, exclaiming, “No.” as they both looked surprised by what she had done.

Jungkook glances down at their hands and back at her. Flustered, she immediately let go of his hand and tries to think of an explanation while his gaze on her intensified.

That assuredly changed his mind. Looks like he didn’t ruin anything after all.

Jennie felt embarrassed at what she had just done. She didn’t know what had gotten into her to grab him so suddenly. Various questions swarmed her mind. She didn’t mean to grab him, did she? Why did she stop him? Why did she say no? Why is his stare so enticing? Why did she have the desire to kiss him again? Why does he look so damn good, tonight? Why is she thinking of her best friend like this?

Before any of them could speak, they hear a loud ring and vibration. They realized it was Jennie's phone in her pocket and she takes it out. Jen was actually waiting for Sejin to call her so he could take her to the airport, but it wasn’t him. It was one of her friends that wanted to catch up.

Something changed in Jungkook’s demeanor which caused him to gently grab her hand. “Don’t answer it.” he takes the phone.

Rejecting the call, he presses the top button for a moment and swipes to the right to turn it off. Tossing it on the bed, he turns his attention back to her, uttering, "Everyone is always interrupting. Ruining any type of alone time I have with you. But not anymore. They can wait. This time just focus on us."

And she did as she spontaneously grabs him by his shirt to pull him in for another kiss. It briefly Jungshooked him that she took the lead so suddenly. She then walks forward until his back was against the wall.

‘Wow.’ he thought in wonder. He didn’t know she had this side to her. His curiosity grew and he decided to let her do whatever she wanted to him.

When she grabbed him, it confirmed everything that Jungkook had said. He knew she wanted to stay like this. He felt everything and enjoyed her hands wandering all over him with no shame as she pressed up against him with his hands around her waist.

Jen allowed herself to be vulnerable, no more walls between them. Each time they kissed, it was like they were kissing to make up for all those moments of emotions building. The doubts and hesitation went away. Jen relished the closeness and felt euphoric when she was with him.

Jungkook flips their position easily when he promptly turned them around. A thump was heard when her back connected to the wall. She had her moment of leading, now it was time to resume where he left off.

She soon felt his warm breath against her ear. “You’re mine.” she hears him confess in English. That statement made her shiver as her heart fluttered.

All that was on his mind was her as he felt her hold onto him tightly. After all this time, he was finally able to kiss her the way he wanted. With no cameras around, with no one to interrupt them. They were alone. Together.

Their kissing got so passionate that Jen’s knees began to feel weak. She had mentally prepared for the embarrassment of dropping to the floor but Jungkook bent down slightly with his hands under her thighs. He effortlessly hoists her up as she says his name breathlessly and wrapped her legs around his waist.

He didn’t want her to go anywhere. She wasn’t going to slip away like she always does when they’re alone.

Jennie completely underestimated him. She didn’t think he would do all of this. As much as she wanted to say that he was getting carried away, they both were but she didn’t want him to stop what he was doing.

Restricted by his large body and broad shoulders, she takes off his beanie, dropping it to the floor and ran a hand through his soft hair. She couldn’t escape if she wanted to as he continued to kiss her with determination to show her that his feelings were real. As she continued to kiss him with the same amount of emotion.

Was this love?
Everything that she was feeling?

How his words and kisses made her feel so special? How she loved the fact that he called her his? How she couldn’t see herself with anyone else but him? How she just wanted to see him happy and wanted what’s best for him? This unexplainable happiness she gets whenever she sees him?

Losing track of time, she noticed she was slowly getting set down. They both were catching their breath as their chests rose up and down heavily. Jen was so speechless at what they had done, that she couldn’t move.

‘You’re mine.’ she thought about his words as the butterflies in her stomach came back tenfold.

Jungkook presses a forearm over her head and stares at her. That adrenaline rush he had with all that confidence was slowly going back down as his face got red from their previous actions. He didn’t know what got into him to do all that he did, but he was proud that he finally told her how he felt.

“I don’t want you to give me an answer now, we’re emotional and I know you are about to leave. From what just happened, I get this feeling that I already know the answer but I want to hear it from you to confirm it. So, take all the time you need to think about this, I’ll wait for your answer when you come back. I just needed to get this off my chest.” he says. “If you say no, I’ll understand. I would never force you to love me. I’ll still cherish you as my friend because I love you that much. But part of me strongly believes that you will say yes. And when we’re officially together, I promise that we’ll always be happy. I’ll be the best boyfriend you’ll ever have.”

He removes his forearm and gently cups her face. “I love you,” he whispers in English and kisses her softly one last time before leaving the room.

Leaning against the wall, Jen stood there, stunned for a few minutes, trying to grasp what just happened and what she just did with her best friend. Trying to understand what had gotten into her to do all that she did as she thought about her feelings.

Sliding down on the wall, she sits on the floor and pushes her hair back with her hands.
‘I love you…’ was the only thought on her mind.

What was she going to do?

Notes