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If You

Pride

Jiyong rubbed his eyes before turning his attention back to the plans on the table. After the wedding, they would have three months together before he went to enlist, and most of that time would be spent on the tour. That’s a poor way to begin a marriage, he mused, but it’s the best we’ve got.

The door opened and he glanced over his shoulder. “Still here?” he asked.

“Want me to leave?” Emily teased.

“Never,” he said, wrapping his arms around her comfortably. She looked over the table and picked up the nearest piece of paper. “Is everything ready for the tour?” she asked, perusing the paper.

“I wish,” Jiyong sighed. “It feels like there's still a million details to wrap up, and it's only six weeks away.”

“That's how I feel about the wedding,” she groaned. “I did get a dress today, but that's about it. We don't have a venue, or flowers or-”

“We will,” he said, interrupting her gently. “Can I help with anything?”

“You've got enough to do,” she said, dropping the paper back onto the table. “I'm sure between your mom, Dami and I we'll figure something out.”

Jiyong suddenly remembered something and he dug into his pocket. “Here,” he said, and he pulled out a small black box and handed it to her. “I picked them up this morning,” he said as she opened it.

“Jiyong-”

“If you don't like it we can get something else,” he said quickly, “but it made me think of you.”

She pulled the diamond ring out of the box and turned it over in her fingers. “It's beautiful,” she whispered as the light bounced off the gleaming surface. She carefully slid it back into the box and took his ring out. “Why is yours so plain?” she asked. “I thought you liked fancy jewelry.”

“I do,” he admitted, “but I wanted something different for this. Besides, the girl usually has the fancy ring, right?”

The door opened and the other guys came straggling in, looking exhausted. “Enjoy your run?” Emily called as they flopped onto the couch.

“No,” Daesung said irritably.

“Come on, Daesung, don't be like that,” Seungri said, clapping him on the shoulder.

“He's just mad because a car soaked him as it passed by,” Youngbae said tiredly.

“All I'm saying is that's the last time you talk me into running on the outer side,” Daesung mumbled as he peeled his wet shoes and socks off and tossed them into the corner. “Talking about the wedding, or the tour?” he asked.

“Both,” Jiyong replied. Another thing occurred to him and he turned back to Emily. “Did you find a third bridesmaid yet?” he asked.

“I'd totally forgotten,” she groaned, “but I'll think about it tonight. No matter what happens, though, one of them has to walk with Mandie.”

Jiyong couldn't help chuckling as he looked over at his friends. “They have no idea what they're in for,” he murmured.


******


The weeks slowly trickled by until the wedding was only ten days away and Emily was truly feeling the pressure. They'd found a beautiful hotel ballroom for the ceremony and reception, and with Han Bi’s help they had a caterer, flowers and a band lined up. Youngbae and the other guys had begged to do a special song at the reception and, after weeks of pleading, Emily had agreed. “Just… nothing too embarrassing,” she had requested.

She had considered all the candidates for her third bridesmaid and finally settled on Hae Soo, who had been overjoyed to accept. It would be a small wedding, with less than a hundred guests, but Emily felt satisfied. Now all I have to do is keep my family from saying something stupid and we'll be fine, she thought to herself.

She had stopped by Dami's store for her last fitting and couldn't help staring at herself in the mirror. The dress was a physical representation of everything she and Jiyong had gone through together - the fighting, the apologies, the blissful happiness, even the moments where she thought she'd never see him again. It was all worth it, she decided.

Dami stood up and surveyed her work. “How does that feel?” she asked.

“Better,” Emily said, rolling her shoulders back. “The straps were a little loose before, but it feels much more secure now.”

“And are you wearing heels?” Dami asked as she put her supplies away.

Emily grimaced and shook her head. “The last time I did I ended up on crutches for two weeks,” she said, “so I think I'll stick with flats.”

Dami nodded. “When does your family come in?”

“Tomorrow,” she murmured. “I wanted them to have time to meet you and the rest of Jiyong's family before the wedding, so I booked a private room at a nice restaurant downtown.”

“I can't wait to meet them,” Dami said enthusiastically. “Jiyong's told me a few stories.”

“Which ones?” Emily asked in alarm.

“Don't worry, nothing bad,” Dami laughed, “though I would've liked to see Jiyong's face at that dinner table.”

Emily groaned and Dami laughed again. “You can get dressed now,” she said over her shoulder, so Emily slipped behind the screen and changed into her street clothes.

“Hey, I have a question.”

“Shoot,” Emily said, coming back out.

“Where are you and Jiyong going to live after the wedding?”

Emily felt panic streak through her. “I can't believe I forgot about that!” she exclaimed. “Neither of us have even thought about a place to live yet.”

“Don't worry, you've got time,” Dami said soothingly.

“Right now it feels like I've got everything but time,” Emily grumbled.


******


Emily folded her arms as they waited beside the car. “I still think we should've met them by the gate,” she said for the tenth time.

“Relax babe, it's fine,” Jiyong replied, putting an arm around her shoulder. “The attendant will make sure they don't get lost in the airport. Besides, I don't think Sagowa could handle another fan mobbing right now.”

“You look pretty nondescript to me,” she commented, nodding at his plain hoodie and sunglasses.

“Not when you've - there they are!”

He pointed at the main entrance and Emily spotted her family coming out, following a perky little airport attendant. “Dad!” she called, waving excitedly. “Si! Mandie!”

“Emily!” they cheered, and they quickly overtook the attendant as they hurried over to her. “It's been ages!” Mandie exclaimed as she threw her arms around Emily.

There was a flurry of hugs and kisses and laughter as she made the rounds, then they all turned to Jiyong. “Well son,” her dad said gravely, “welcome to the family.”

All four kids grabbed Jiyong and pulled him into a bear hug, something Emily had prepared him for, so he threw his arms out and squeezed them all tightly. “Thanks,” he gasped.

They let go and her dad nudged Silas with his cane. “You and your brothers get the bags into the car,” he directed. As they worked Emily pulled her dad aside. “Why do you have a cane?” she asked in a low voice.

“I uh… I had some minor surgery on my knee,” he admitted.

“Daddy!”

“It was very minor, and I didn't want to concern you with it,” he said stubbornly. “You've had a very emotional time over the last few months, and I was giving you space.”

“Where are we going first, Em?” Mandie asked excitedly. Emily gave her dad a look before turning to her sister. “We'll take you to your hotel now, and a limo will pick you up at seven for dinner. We've reserved a nice restaurant, so-”

“Wear something nice, I know,” Mandie said, waving her hand dismissively. “You told me like ten times on the phone.”

“I'm serious,” Emily insisted. “You're meeting Jiyong's family for the first time tonight, and I want it to go well.”

“Do as your sister says,” her dad said gently. “The bride is the boss, you know.”

Soon the car was loaded and they all piled in to head to the hotel.

“This your car, Jong?” Tom asked.

Emily groaned inwardly, but she saw Jiyong hide a smile. “No, I borrowed it from the company,” he said as he steered them away from the curb.

“What kind of car do you have?” Mattie pressed.

“Jiyong has several cars, Matt,” Emily called, “and before you ask, you're not driving any of them.”

They made it to the hotel and all of them swore to be ready to go when the limo arrived at seven. “I'm sorry,” Emily said as they headed back to YG ENTERTAINMENT.

“For what?” Jiyong asked.

“ 'Jong’?” she reminded him, “and don't get me started on Mandie's fake tattoo.”

“Hey now, a lot of V.I.P.s get crown tattoos,” Jiyong said casually, though he was obviously holding back laughter.

“Jiyong!”

“What's the big deal?” he asked as they turned into the parking lot. “At least they're making an effort.”

“I know,” she sighed, “I just… this week is going to be the only time our families will be together for a long time, and I want it to be special.”

Jiyong put the car in park and took her hand. “I'm the one who should be apologizing,” he said. “My life, who I am, it's a lot more than most people have to deal with in a relationship. You probably never thought you'd have to put up with… all of this.” He gestured at the YG building towering above them and sighed.

“No,” Emily agreed, “but I wouldn't have it any other way.”

He brightened a little at this and leaned over the seat to kiss her before getting out of the car. After returning the company car keys and picking up Emily's cocktail dress from her apartment, they went back to the penthouse to relax before dinner.

As they got off the elevator they were hit with a pungent smell like melting rubber, and a trickle of smoke floated from under the penthouse door.

“It must be a fire!” Jiyong shouted, running down the hallway. Emily dropped her dress and ran after him, catching up just as he threw the door open. A cloud of gritty smoke rushed at them and they both started coughing painfully. “Youngbae!” Jiyong shouted, leaning against the door frame. “Daesung! Seungri!”

“We’re here!” Daesung called from somewhere inside.

“What happened? What caught fire?” Jiyong panted.

Daesung walked through the smoke, brandishing what looked like a baking sheet as he waved the smoke out into the hallway. “Relax, it's not a fire,” he said, “Seungri just burned something in the oven.”

“Burned what, a whole pig?” Emily gasped.

The smoke cleared and they were finally able to enter the apartment, where Youngbae was waving a fan at the still-smoking oven and Seungri stared dejectedly at a pan in the sink. “Hey guys,” he said forlornly.

“What happened?” Jiyong asked, waving the smoke away from his eyes.

“Seungri nearly set the kitchen on fire,” Youngbae announced, his voice muffled from the cloth tied around his nose and mouth.

“I was just trying to bake something, but I fell asleep and didn't hear the timer go off,” Seungri mumbled.

“If Daesung and I hadn't gotten back when we did, the whole apartment would be in flames right now,” Youngbae added.

Emily peered into the sink at the blackened pan. “Were you baking cookies?” she asked.

“They were supposed to be a surprise treat for you,” he said glumly. Emily put a comforting hand on his shoulder and suppressed a smile as Daesung came back into the kitchen. “I called the superintendent and told him what happened, so they won't call the fire department, and I've opened all the windows,” he announced.

Emily checked her watch. “It's gonna take hours to air this place out, and if I bring my dress in here I'll smell like an ashtray at dinner,” she groaned.

“Come on, it's not that bad,” Seungri said, attempting a smile.

“Look, the wind’s already blowing it away,” Youngbae said helpfully.

Jiyong reentered the room with Emily's garment bag slung over his shoulder and he handed it to her. “You go shower and I'll get this straightened out,” he said, shooing her into the hallway.

As the shower heated Emily caught another whiff of smoke and shook her head. Please let nothing else go wrong, she prayed silently.


******


Jiyong fiddled with his hair in the hall mirror as he waited for Emily. “Come on, babe, we're going to be late!” he called. “The guys will be there by now!”

“Coming!” she shouted, and he heard quick footsteps as she finally emerged from the bathroom. “Sorry, my earring broke,” she said, still putting it in as she grabbed her purse. She wore a simple black cocktail dress, and her hair was pinned back in a neat chignon. Jiyong smiled as he saw her slip on her favorite flats and he grabbed his jacket. “Ready?” he asked, opening the door for her.

They took the Lamborghini down to the restaurant and Jiyong noticed she was chewing her lip anxiously. “Are you nervous?” he asked.

“A little,” she admitted. “I just realized this is the first time I'm meeting your dad. What if-”

“He already likes you,” Jiyong interrupted. “Mom's not giving him much choice, apparently.”

This made her smile and he felt a small sense of elation as they pulled up to the restaurant. The valet took his keys and they couldn't help watching him drive away until he disappeared around the corner. Emily turned to him after a moment, her eyes clouded with memory. “Do you remember-”

“Yes,” he murmured. She shivered a little, then took his hand and summoned a winning smile. “We still made it,” she said, threading her arm through his.

The hostess took them back to the private room, where they found both families and the remaining BIGBANG members already seated. “Look, it's the happy couple!” Mr. Carter announced. Everyone stood up and applauded them loudly, and Jiyong thought he might burst with pride as they walked over and took their places at the far edge of the circular table.

Emily had requested place cards for everyone, ensuring the party was well-mingled around the table. She had put him beside Mr. Carter, and his father sat on her other side.

“Emily Carter,” he said, getting up and bowing deeply. “I am Kwon Cheong Do. It is an honor to meet my future daughter-in-law.”

Emily gracefully returned the bow just as a waiter brought a round of drinks for everyone. So far so good, Jiyong thought, sipping his wine as he scanned the table.

“Of course, for a while we weren't sure we'd ever have a daughter-in-law,” his father continued. Jiyong choked on his wine and Emily quickly handed him a napkin.

“Cheong Do!” Han Bi said reprovingly.

“What?” he asked. “It's true!”

“So, what's the birth order?” Dami asked, turning to Tom.

“Emily, then Silas, me, Mattie and Mandie,” he said, pointing at each person in turn.

“Are you and Mattie twins?” Han Bi asked.

“No, we are,” Mandie volunteered, “but they get that a lot.”

Emily had put Mandie between Silas and Daesung, who stared at her as if she might turn into a pumpkin at any moment. Seungri sat between Tom and Silas, while Youngbae flanked Mattie and Han Bi. Emily hoped this would make conversation less awkward, but so far Youngbae and Daesung hadn't said a word to any of them.

“Emily, when do we get our dresses?” Mandie asked.

“I'll take you by the shop tomorrow for a fitting,” Dami replied. “It shouldn't need much, though.”

“Oh, that reminds me,” Emily said suddenly. “Youngbae, since you're the best man, can you take the boys to rent suits? They didn't have any at home, so I told them to just pick some up here in Seoul.”

Youngbae blinked before answering. “Sure,” he said cautiously.

What's up with him? Jiyong wondered. I hope he's not feeling sick again.

The waiters brought in the food and for a few minutes everyone was occupied with eating. Everyone seems to be getting along well, he thought, watching them converse together in low voices. His parents didn't speak much English, but his friends and Dami did a good job of translating back and forth. He saw his father lean over and whisper in Emily's ear, then she blushed and took a large sip of her drink. “What did he say?” he asked her quietly.

“Apparently he would appreciate a grandson sooner rather than later,” she replied.

Jiyong hadn't even thought about this yet and it made him momentarily dizzy. “We never discussed kids, did we?” he muttered.

“And we're not going to right now,” she said firmly.

“Aw sis,” Mattie groaned, “couldn't we have normal food?” He held up a piece of sushi impaled on a fork and grimaced. “It's not even-”

Mandie kicked him under the table and he fell silent, giving her a dirty look. Jiyong silently gave thanks and turned back to Emily. “How are your Korean lessons going?” he asked in English.

“They only started last week, but so far I'm acing the class,” she said in Korean, jutting her chin proudly.

“It is good you're learning this,” his father said approvingly. “I know it's hard, but-”

“English, please!” Mattie called loudly, “not all of us speak gibberish!”

Emily clenched her hand under the table and Jiyong looked at Daesung pleadingly.

“Emily said you like fishing,” Daesung said, attempting to change the subject. “I've always wanted to try that.”

“Maybe you could if you didn't spend your time twirling and playing dress-up. You Korean guys are so girly.”

“Mattie!” Emily exclaimed in horror.

“What?” he demanded, shrugging a shoulder, “It's true, sis. You'd know better than anyone, right?”

“You have no idea what I know,” Emily replied, “and I'll thank you to keep your mouth shut.”

“How's the tour planning going?” Mandie asked Jiyong desperately. “Emily said you're going to Europe, right?”

“Where else can he hang out with his other gay friends?” Mattie sniggered.

Jiyong stood up calmly and leveled his gaze across the table. “Enough,” he growled. “Not here, not at this table. I won't have it. Do you understand?”

Mattie raised his hands placatingly. “Alright, alright,” he said, leaning back in his chair.

Jiyong sat back down and saw that his father was holding Emily’s hand in his. “It's okay,” he murmured, kissing her on the head before resuming his meal.

They all ate in silence for a minute, then Han Bi cleared her throat. “I… would make a toast,” she said in thickly accented English. She raised her glass and everyone else followed suit. “To the bride and groom,” she said, beaming at the two of them. “May you be happy, and may your lives be good.”

“Not likely since she's obviously marrying a gay guy,” Mattie mumbled.

The glasses went back down and Jiyong felt a streak of rage, but before he could say anything Daesung leapt up and punched Mattie so hard he toppled backwards out of his chair and lay sprawled on the floor. He glared at Daesung and got up to retaliate, but Silas grabbed him and pinned his arms behind his back. He dragged Mattie out of the room and no one spoke as they stared at Daesung and the overturned chair.

Daesung tugged his shirt down, then bowed toward Jiyong and Emily. “I'm sorry, Emily,” he muttered.

Everyone looked to see her response, but she was staring at her lap and didn't reply.

“Jiyong-”

“It's okay, Daesung,” Jiyong said immediately.

A waiter came in to investigate the crash and Youngbae was quick to send him away again. The table was silent once more, until Mr. Carter cleared his throat. “I appreciate what you did, young man,” he said, looking at Daesung. “I would've done something similar myself, if I could've gotten over there fast enough.”

He turned and raised his glass high. “To the bride and groom,” he said in a clear voice.

“To the bride and groom,” everyone echoed.

Jiyong and Emily sipped their drinks obediently, but he saw her chin was wobbling and he felt incensed all over again. How dare that punk try to ruin this dinner? he thought angrily.

The meal didn't last much longer and they soon left the restaurant, Jiyong only pausing to give the waiter a huge tip for his trouble. As he rejoined the others he realized he didn't see Emily among them. “Where's Emily?” he asked Dami.

“I'm not sure,” she said with a shrug. Her car was brought and she motioned for their parents to come, but his mother stopped for a moment. “Jiyong, I want you to tell Emily that what happened tonight doesn't change our opinion of her,” she said in a low voice. “In fact, I think your father's quite smitten with her.”

Jiyong hugged her tightly. “Thanks Mom,” he whispered, “that means a lot.”

They climbed in after Dami and left, but still Emily didn't appear.

“Don't worry, she's with Dad,” Silas rumbled from behind him. Silas was exceptionally tall and broad, but the brown eyes that looked down at Jiyong were Emily's. “I'm sorry for Mattie's behavior,” he said quietly.

Jiyong was unable to say anything remotely polite in return, so he just nodded. “Where is he?” he asked.

“In a cab, on his way back to the hotel,” Silas replied, “but only after I yelled at him for a solid ten minutes.”

The restaurant door opened and Emily and Mr. Carter came out together. Even in the dimness Jiyong could tell she had been crying, but she smiled at him as they came down the steps.

“Looks like our car's here,” Mr. Carter said as the limo came around the corner. He stuck his hand out and Jiyong shook it firmly. “I was impressed by the way you handled things tonight,” he said softly. “From what Emily has told me, you have always done your best to care for her and respect her, and I couldn't ask any more of you than that. Love my daughter well, son.”

Jiyong felt a lump in his throat and he shook Mr. Carter's hand again. “I will, sir,” he managed, “I promise.”

The limo pulled away and it was just them and their friends again. Emily took a deep breath and folded her arms tightly. “Look guys, I couldn't be more-”

“You have nothing to apologize for,” Seungri interrupted.

“Just let me say this,” she said stubbornly. “I couldn't be more embarrassed about my brother's behavior tonight, but I also couldn't be more grateful for the way you all handled it. All of you have done so much for us, and I'm…” her voice caught and she wiped fresh tears off her cheeks. “Thank you,” she whispered.

They all wrapped her in a hug, their own eyes misting over, and they stayed that way until the valet gave a polite tap on the horn of Youngbae's car. After they left, Jiyong took Emily's hand again. “Are you alright?” he asked softly.

“I will be,” she said, “but right now I just want to go home and sleep.”

Jiyong's Lamborghini came around the corner and the valet opened the passenger door for her.

“Come on then,” Jiyong whispered, “let's go home.”

Notes

Comments

Please please please continue this. I've read it three times now and it just makes me fall in love every time. It is a wonderful story. Also, please put it on AO3, its a very friendly community for writers.

Maliciouspixie5 Maliciouspixie5
11/13/19

@Maliciouspixie5
Thank you!

Oh I just love this. Beautiful story.

@k pop lover
Haha thanks, I'll try!

please update more often. caus ei reallyl ike this story

k pop lover k pop lover
8/29/18