In the End
Chapter 2
Shownu
Shownu took a deep breath as he stopped outside of the room labeled “8forfate” on the white sticker on the door. He patted his clothes down, smoothing any wrinkles left from getting shoved out the door by his Monsta X members.
“‘Go catch up with her!’” Shownu muttered, “Or so they say. I haven’t seen her for three years!” She had forgiven him for leaving without saying goodbye, but any conversation longer than a few sentences was bound to be awkward. Shownu swallowed and steeled his resolve to knock when the door opened to reveal one of Jiwon’s members.
“Oh!” She gasped softly and bowed, “Hello sunbae.” Shownu gave her a little smile and nodded.
“Hello. Is Jiwon in there?” He queried. The girl nodded and turned.
“Jiwon-ah!” She called, “Shownu-sunbae is looking for you!” There was a scramble of movement from inside the room, and Jiwon popped up behind the girl.
“Sunbae!” Her eyes lit up as she pulled Shownu inside, “Come in!” Shownu smiled in amusement.
“You’re not going to call me oppa anymore?” He teased. Jiwon shook her finger.
“We’ve both debuted now, so it’s only right!” She insisted. Shownu chuckled.
“Have it your way.” He ruffled her hair, eliciting a squeak of protest from Jiwon.
“Stop it!” She protested.
“Is he bullying you, Jiwon?” A new voice interrupted them, and Shownu turned to see Jinyoung standing by the doorway.
“Jinyoung-ah.” He greeted his old friend with a firm hug, “What are you doing here?” Jinyoung pointed at Jiwon.
“Picking up this silly girl.” He replied as he walked around Shownu and wrapped an arm around Jiwon’s shoulders. Shownu looked at the intimate move carefully.
“Wait, are you two…?” He pointed at Jinyoung’s arm. Jiwon blushed and Jinyoung grinned.
“You’re right.” His eyes sparkled happily, “She finally agreed. Keep it a secret, won’t you? We’re not supposed to let this get out so soon.” Shownu smiled and nodded.
“Of course.” He understood the delicacy of dating in their line of work. At the same time, he suddenly felt a lump rising in his throat as truth sunk in. Jiwon was no longer the young girl who trailed after him in the practice room and begged for dance tutoring, to be able to improve faster and debut sooner. She was the main vocalist of a girl group that was full of potential, under a large company and at the center of the world’s attention. And now, she was also Jinyoung’s girlfriend.
Why does my chest feel so tight?
“How did you two…?” He swallowed and let the question trail off. Jinyoung smiled sadly.
“I guess I have to thank you.” He replied, “The day we both realized you left, she found me in the back staircase and we cried together. She was probably more devastated than me that you’d left. There was a cloud hanging over her head for weeks.” Jiwon looked down at her feet, silent. Shownu sighed and reached out to gently tuck a stray strand of hair behind her ear.
“I’m sorry, Jiwon-ah.” He murmured, “I’m glad Jinyoung was there for you.” Jiwon raised her head and smiled bravely.
“It’s okay now, sunbae.” She said, “I’m just glad to see you again. I watched your survival show, every episode of it.” Jinyoung chuckled and poke Jiwon on the nose.
“She cried when you were chosen for Monsta X.” He teased. Jiwon squealed and batted his hand away.
“You’re going to embarrass me oppa!” She protested with a laugh. Jinyoung laughed and wrapped an arm around her waist.
“I’m only telling the truth.” He replied with an easy smile. Shownu felt the lump in his throat rise again as he watched them interact, suddenly feeling that he was intruding on their private world. He cleared his throat and backed towards the door.
“Jiwon-ah, I’ll email you and catch up some other time.” He said as his hand touched the doorknob. Jiwon frowned in surprise.
“But you just got here!” She pouted. Shownu chuckled awkwardly and backed out the door.
“I’ll see you.” He simply said before closing the door behind him. Shownu swallowed hard as he stood outside the closed door.
“Oppa, you must have driven him away!” Jiwon’s voice came from inside the dressing room, followed by Jinyoung’s protest.
“I did not! Monsta X is busy too, he probably had to get to a schedule.” He assured her.
“Are you sure?” Jiwon asked hesitantly, sounding uncertain. Jinyoung chuckled.
“Positive. Now, think about what you want for dinner.” He smoothly changed the subject, and Shownu sighed heavily as he walked away from the dressing room.
What’s wrong with me?
Jiwon, night time
“I’m hungry~” Jinyoung’s voice came from behind Jiwon as he snaked an arm around her waist, “Are you done cooking yet?” Jiwon gave him a light shove.
“Control yourself and your skinship.” She warned lightly, “I made that clear the first day I agreed to date you.” Jinyoung let out a whine.
“Fine…” He trudged back to the table where he sat down and contented himself with watching her cook, his head resting on his fist. Jiwon shook her head and laughed softly as she returned to the pot boiling on the stove. Given the circumstances, she should have been more than happy to spend the night with Jinyoung. After all, they rarely both had empty night schedules, and his members had been all too happy to leave them alone while hers had been quite eager to shove her out their dorm door. Yet, Jiwon couldn’t help but feel uncomfortable as she felt his eyes on her back.
This isn’t what dating should feel like.
She was comfortable around Jinyoung; he was kind and respected her. After being under the same company for so many years, she knew him well enough to be herself around him. But somehow, the word “boyfriend” didn’t seem to roll off her tongue that easily. She had agreed to date him after his persistent wheedling and obvious care for her had shown through, but…
What if I made the wrong choice?
Jiwon shook her head, brushing away the thought as quickly as it had come.
Cut it out. He’s your boyfriend now, and it’s high time you started thinking of him that way. Few people could even dream of having someone like him as their boyfriend. Jinyoung had been with her every moment after Shownu’s departure from JYP, taking up the role of sunbae, guide, friend, and teacher all at once. She owed him a lot.
Shownu…
Her mind flashed back to Shownu’s expression when Jinyoung had told him about their relationship. It was an expression Jiwon had never seen on his face before, and she had wanted to reach out and wipe it right off his face. A lump rose in her throat as she tried to place the expressions. There had been surprise, followed by shock, and then...something else had gone quickly across his face before Shownu’s features had settled into awkward neutrality. What was it?
Disappointment? Sadness?
“...won. Jiwon!” Jinyoung’s voice startled her out of her reverie, and she turned her head to see Jinyoung taking the pot off the stove.
“Aish, it’s going to boil over if you zone out like that.” Jinyoung chided softly, “What’s got you in such a daze?” Jiwon shook her head.
“It’s nothing.” She lied as she took the pot back from Jinyoung and ducked her head so he couldn’t see her trouble expression.
That’s right. I need to stop thinking about the past and move on to what’s good for me now, in the present. Your crush on him from your trainee days together should just stay in the past.
Her hand tightened on the handle of the pot, letting out a yelp as a finger strayed to the hot edge.
“What is it?” Jinyoung rushed to her side and grabbed her hand, “Aish, you should be more careful!” He turned off the stove and ran her finger under the cold water.
“My heart hurts if you get hurt, you know?” He said softly as he blew on her finger after drying it off, “Does it still hurt?” Jiwon shook her head silently and bit her lip. She leaned into his shoulder with a soft sigh and wrapped her arms around him with another deep sigh.
“What’s wrong?” He asked in concern, his hand gently resting on her back. Jiwon shook her head.
“Nothing. Just hug me for a while.” She replied. Jinyoung chuckled as he obliged.
“This is new. You’re usually the one avoiding skinship.” He commented. Jiwon shook her head again and simply held him tighter.
I have to move on.
Shownu, Monsta X’s dorm
Shownu sighed as he tugged an old photo out of his wallet, shoved behind ID cards and silly pictures of his group. A younger Jiwon smiled out of the picture at him, her long hair blowing lightly in the wind as she grinned shyly. Shownu groaned and shoved the picture back in.
“So what if she’s dating Jinyoung?” He muttered. Jinyoung was a good person, and his close friend. If their CEO was fine with it, then there was no reason to question it further. Shownu pulled a pillow over his head.
“She’s just like a little sister to me, that’s all.” He told himself firmly, “And seeing her date someone makes me protective.” He nodded and tossed the pillow back onto the bed. Yes, that’s what it was. But for the sake of his own sanity and the health of her dating life, it was probably best for him to stay away from her for a while. After all, it would be rude to look troubled in front of her all the time, as he was sure he did today as the reality of her dating status sunk in. He would contact her after he got used to it.
“Shownu-hyung!” Wonho’s voice came from the middle of their dorm, “Come here for a moment!” Shownu sighed and swung off the bed, padding out of the room and into where he found his members huddled around Wonho’s laptop.
“What is it?” He asked as he leaned over Wonho’s blue silver head to look at the screen. Shownu’s eyes widened as he took in the title of the article his members were gawking at. In less than ten Hangul characters, his plan to avoid Jiwon was completely shattered.
Monsta X’s Shownu to collaborate with 8forfate’s Jiwon for special performance at Pyeongchang Winter Olympics Celebratory Concert.
“I’m so jealous hyung, she’s so pretty and talented!” Kihyun’s voice sailed right over Shownu’s head as he took a step back in shock.
You have got to be kidding me.
Shownu took a deep breath as he stopped outside of the room labeled “8forfate” on the white sticker on the door. He patted his clothes down, smoothing any wrinkles left from getting shoved out the door by his Monsta X members.
“‘Go catch up with her!’” Shownu muttered, “Or so they say. I haven’t seen her for three years!” She had forgiven him for leaving without saying goodbye, but any conversation longer than a few sentences was bound to be awkward. Shownu swallowed and steeled his resolve to knock when the door opened to reveal one of Jiwon’s members.
“Oh!” She gasped softly and bowed, “Hello sunbae.” Shownu gave her a little smile and nodded.
“Hello. Is Jiwon in there?” He queried. The girl nodded and turned.
“Jiwon-ah!” She called, “Shownu-sunbae is looking for you!” There was a scramble of movement from inside the room, and Jiwon popped up behind the girl.
“Sunbae!” Her eyes lit up as she pulled Shownu inside, “Come in!” Shownu smiled in amusement.
“You’re not going to call me oppa anymore?” He teased. Jiwon shook her finger.
“We’ve both debuted now, so it’s only right!” She insisted. Shownu chuckled.
“Have it your way.” He ruffled her hair, eliciting a squeak of protest from Jiwon.
“Stop it!” She protested.
“Is he bullying you, Jiwon?” A new voice interrupted them, and Shownu turned to see Jinyoung standing by the doorway.
“Jinyoung-ah.” He greeted his old friend with a firm hug, “What are you doing here?” Jinyoung pointed at Jiwon.
“Picking up this silly girl.” He replied as he walked around Shownu and wrapped an arm around Jiwon’s shoulders. Shownu looked at the intimate move carefully.
“Wait, are you two…?” He pointed at Jinyoung’s arm. Jiwon blushed and Jinyoung grinned.
“You’re right.” His eyes sparkled happily, “She finally agreed. Keep it a secret, won’t you? We’re not supposed to let this get out so soon.” Shownu smiled and nodded.
“Of course.” He understood the delicacy of dating in their line of work. At the same time, he suddenly felt a lump rising in his throat as truth sunk in. Jiwon was no longer the young girl who trailed after him in the practice room and begged for dance tutoring, to be able to improve faster and debut sooner. She was the main vocalist of a girl group that was full of potential, under a large company and at the center of the world’s attention. And now, she was also Jinyoung’s girlfriend.
Why does my chest feel so tight?
“How did you two…?” He swallowed and let the question trail off. Jinyoung smiled sadly.
“I guess I have to thank you.” He replied, “The day we both realized you left, she found me in the back staircase and we cried together. She was probably more devastated than me that you’d left. There was a cloud hanging over her head for weeks.” Jiwon looked down at her feet, silent. Shownu sighed and reached out to gently tuck a stray strand of hair behind her ear.
“I’m sorry, Jiwon-ah.” He murmured, “I’m glad Jinyoung was there for you.” Jiwon raised her head and smiled bravely.
“It’s okay now, sunbae.” She said, “I’m just glad to see you again. I watched your survival show, every episode of it.” Jinyoung chuckled and poke Jiwon on the nose.
“She cried when you were chosen for Monsta X.” He teased. Jiwon squealed and batted his hand away.
“You’re going to embarrass me oppa!” She protested with a laugh. Jinyoung laughed and wrapped an arm around her waist.
“I’m only telling the truth.” He replied with an easy smile. Shownu felt the lump in his throat rise again as he watched them interact, suddenly feeling that he was intruding on their private world. He cleared his throat and backed towards the door.
“Jiwon-ah, I’ll email you and catch up some other time.” He said as his hand touched the doorknob. Jiwon frowned in surprise.
“But you just got here!” She pouted. Shownu chuckled awkwardly and backed out the door.
“I’ll see you.” He simply said before closing the door behind him. Shownu swallowed hard as he stood outside the closed door.
“Oppa, you must have driven him away!” Jiwon’s voice came from inside the dressing room, followed by Jinyoung’s protest.
“I did not! Monsta X is busy too, he probably had to get to a schedule.” He assured her.
“Are you sure?” Jiwon asked hesitantly, sounding uncertain. Jinyoung chuckled.
“Positive. Now, think about what you want for dinner.” He smoothly changed the subject, and Shownu sighed heavily as he walked away from the dressing room.
What’s wrong with me?
Jiwon, night time
“I’m hungry~” Jinyoung’s voice came from behind Jiwon as he snaked an arm around her waist, “Are you done cooking yet?” Jiwon gave him a light shove.
“Control yourself and your skinship.” She warned lightly, “I made that clear the first day I agreed to date you.” Jinyoung let out a whine.
“Fine…” He trudged back to the table where he sat down and contented himself with watching her cook, his head resting on his fist. Jiwon shook her head and laughed softly as she returned to the pot boiling on the stove. Given the circumstances, she should have been more than happy to spend the night with Jinyoung. After all, they rarely both had empty night schedules, and his members had been all too happy to leave them alone while hers had been quite eager to shove her out their dorm door. Yet, Jiwon couldn’t help but feel uncomfortable as she felt his eyes on her back.
This isn’t what dating should feel like.
She was comfortable around Jinyoung; he was kind and respected her. After being under the same company for so many years, she knew him well enough to be herself around him. But somehow, the word “boyfriend” didn’t seem to roll off her tongue that easily. She had agreed to date him after his persistent wheedling and obvious care for her had shown through, but…
What if I made the wrong choice?
Jiwon shook her head, brushing away the thought as quickly as it had come.
Cut it out. He’s your boyfriend now, and it’s high time you started thinking of him that way. Few people could even dream of having someone like him as their boyfriend. Jinyoung had been with her every moment after Shownu’s departure from JYP, taking up the role of sunbae, guide, friend, and teacher all at once. She owed him a lot.
Shownu…
Her mind flashed back to Shownu’s expression when Jinyoung had told him about their relationship. It was an expression Jiwon had never seen on his face before, and she had wanted to reach out and wipe it right off his face. A lump rose in her throat as she tried to place the expressions. There had been surprise, followed by shock, and then...something else had gone quickly across his face before Shownu’s features had settled into awkward neutrality. What was it?
Disappointment? Sadness?
“...won. Jiwon!” Jinyoung’s voice startled her out of her reverie, and she turned her head to see Jinyoung taking the pot off the stove.
“Aish, it’s going to boil over if you zone out like that.” Jinyoung chided softly, “What’s got you in such a daze?” Jiwon shook her head.
“It’s nothing.” She lied as she took the pot back from Jinyoung and ducked her head so he couldn’t see her trouble expression.
That’s right. I need to stop thinking about the past and move on to what’s good for me now, in the present. Your crush on him from your trainee days together should just stay in the past.
Her hand tightened on the handle of the pot, letting out a yelp as a finger strayed to the hot edge.
“What is it?” Jinyoung rushed to her side and grabbed her hand, “Aish, you should be more careful!” He turned off the stove and ran her finger under the cold water.
“My heart hurts if you get hurt, you know?” He said softly as he blew on her finger after drying it off, “Does it still hurt?” Jiwon shook her head silently and bit her lip. She leaned into his shoulder with a soft sigh and wrapped her arms around him with another deep sigh.
“What’s wrong?” He asked in concern, his hand gently resting on her back. Jiwon shook her head.
“Nothing. Just hug me for a while.” She replied. Jinyoung chuckled as he obliged.
“This is new. You’re usually the one avoiding skinship.” He commented. Jiwon shook her head again and simply held him tighter.
I have to move on.
Shownu, Monsta X’s dorm
Shownu sighed as he tugged an old photo out of his wallet, shoved behind ID cards and silly pictures of his group. A younger Jiwon smiled out of the picture at him, her long hair blowing lightly in the wind as she grinned shyly. Shownu groaned and shoved the picture back in.
“So what if she’s dating Jinyoung?” He muttered. Jinyoung was a good person, and his close friend. If their CEO was fine with it, then there was no reason to question it further. Shownu pulled a pillow over his head.
“She’s just like a little sister to me, that’s all.” He told himself firmly, “And seeing her date someone makes me protective.” He nodded and tossed the pillow back onto the bed. Yes, that’s what it was. But for the sake of his own sanity and the health of her dating life, it was probably best for him to stay away from her for a while. After all, it would be rude to look troubled in front of her all the time, as he was sure he did today as the reality of her dating status sunk in. He would contact her after he got used to it.
“Shownu-hyung!” Wonho’s voice came from the middle of their dorm, “Come here for a moment!” Shownu sighed and swung off the bed, padding out of the room and into where he found his members huddled around Wonho’s laptop.
“What is it?” He asked as he leaned over Wonho’s blue silver head to look at the screen. Shownu’s eyes widened as he took in the title of the article his members were gawking at. In less than ten Hangul characters, his plan to avoid Jiwon was completely shattered.
Monsta X’s Shownu to collaborate with 8forfate’s Jiwon for special performance at Pyeongchang Winter Olympics Celebratory Concert.
“I’m so jealous hyung, she’s so pretty and talented!” Kihyun’s voice sailed right over Shownu’s head as he took a step back in shock.
You have got to be kidding me.
