FLASH BACK

After what happened i couldn't even stop being angry to him his poisened words are still ringing in my mind it really hurted me . He called me many times he even came to see me but i wasn't rrally in my mood to see him . So of course he had to do smthg to meet me but he really killed me of fear that day . I was laying on my bed and it was about 7 pm when my phone rang ,it was an unknown number - I know its you i won't pick up dun dream . The number called me over and over so pick up : Hello whose there ??? Actually i couldn't feel my legs nor my hands i droped the phone on the floor and i didn't know what to do saying : He got an accident he is in danger its all my fault he got drunk and drove its all my fault (crying a river ) he should not ... He should not leave me i even didn't say i forgived you i love you jinki plz dun leave me . I run like a crazy out of the house without even wearing my shoes when i just reached the street a black big car was in front of me ,the door was opened and someone pulled me inside it and just i dun know what happened later all i remember is that i opened my eyes to find myself in onew's dorm i was crying and screaming : where are you why have you left me alone . But when i looked around i have found him standing in the corner of the room startling at me , i couldn't understand : he looks completly fine so who ... Uhhh hein why . So what it must be his prank ofc how would he meet me if he didn't lie like this . My face turned red And i was just leaving simply but before i reach the door he closed it and lock it putting the key in his pocket he screamed saying
-you ain't going anywhere you ain't gonna leave before you listen to me and solve this misunderstanding i am really too so.. .
- hey look I am not intrested in what you are going to say just leave me alone give me the key now !!!
- No Who gonna say what should happen is me you just have to obey now lets talk (he shouted).
- I dun wanna talk to you can't you understand we have got nthg to say to each others .
- then FEEL IT (he pulled me against his body and hugged me warmly ) tell me why does your heart beats this much whenever i come close to you if not love what could it be tell me !!!!!
. I pushed him away :
its out of fear i hate being close to you let me leave .
- Look at my eyes and say it c ome on if what you say is true say it while you face me . Said jinki angrilly - I am not obliged give me the key and just forget about me . I walked away of him but he hold my hand agressively He didn’t say anything. At some point between walking in the door angry and upset and seeing me something in his eyes changed. He walked over to me and gently pushed me up against the wall. I knew what was about to happen. I started shaking and was trying to speak but the words wouldn’t come out. He stared into my eyes intensely for a few moments before pinning my arms to the wall and pressing his lips forcefully on mine. I could feel myself shaking more and more. He must have noticed because he pressed his body up against mine. "Could you feel now its me and you are close to me ohhh how long i waited this " He let go of my arms he caressed my hair and put his hands on the back of my neck pulling me as close to him as he could. His hands started to move down my back "just give up i could see and feel your love and your desires" . I could feel his tongue tracing my bottom lip begging for me to open my mouth. I opened my mouth just slightly and felt his tongue on mine. Every kiss became harder and more intense. He began biting my bottom lip. Each touch with more adrenaline than the one before. I couldn’t form one single thought. All I could feel were his hands on my waist and trailing up and down my arms Every time he kissed me I became more deeply entranced. His intensity increased. We had barely come up for air this whole time. Neither of us could pull away. Finally I pushed him off of me. We were both out of breath. I couldn’t speak. I just looked at him. He put his hands on either side of me on the wall and looked into my eyes. I could feel words in the back of my throat but they wouldn’t come out. Did I love him? Was I really going to say I did? Until this moment I had never thought of him as anything more than a best friend. Then it happened. I said it. Clear as day. “I love you.” His intense stare turned into a wide smile. His eyes sparkled. I felt a bubbling excitement I had never felt before. He leaned in and kissed me gently on the lips and moved down to my jaw and my neck and then stared nibbling on my ear. He stopped for a moment still sounding out of breath. I could feel his hot breath on my face and neck and then he whispered “I love you.” He stepped back and looked at me in the eyes. “I’ve loved you since the night of the fashion show i want to know you more i want to be with you even more this is my only wish i dun know wether its right or wrong since i knew you i never thought about anything but how to gain your heart and i did now you should be mine forever We continued talking and kissing the rest of the night. Leaning up against the side of his bed on the floor. I’d be in the middle of a sentence and he would grab me and kiss me until I could no longer breathe. Everything was perfect. We fell asleep side by side on his bed at around 11 o’clock. Exhausted from hours of kissing.

Notes

none of us could even forget what happened that day cause we simply in love and such moments would stuck in the mind forever . fighting for all lovers i hope my diaries would i always wished to acheive would be true <3