The Flower Boy

After crying that day, my bloated eyes were definitely noticeable. I ran over the few unused, unopened bottles on my dresser, reading the labels. BB cream, maybe that’s what I needed. My mother had gotten me it a year ago, sending it with a note saying, “to be used for covering up, but you probably won’t need it ;)”
I looked up at myself in the mirror, wondering if this would make me feel better. “Inivisible” the bottle promised… A little couldn’t hurt right? I dabbed a little of the beige liquid under my eyes, awkwardly smoothing it around my bloated, red eyes. I stood back to see if there was an improvement and surprisingly, I thought it looked pretty good.

“Morning Wonah,” Seungcheol chirped happily at me when I sat down in my seat next to him.
“Morning Seungcheol,” I said taking my bag off my bag self consciously seeing if Seokjin was here yet. Nope, not here yet… wait why do I care?
“Have you been crying Wonah?” I turn my head round to look at Seungcheol. His expression showing worry and confusion. I thought it was unnoticeable with this makeup on...
“How did you…” A whisper grew louder around the classroom, Seungcheol and I looked up to see what all the commotion was about. Seokjin had just stepped into the classroom linked to another person. A girl. Linked by hands in fact. Looking at each other with cheesy smiles, I felt my heart drop slightly. Both in disgust and, disappointment…
“Seokjin has a girlfriend,” “Seungyeon and Seokjin are dating,” “he doesn’t deserve her.” These sort of phrases jumped around the classroom and people decided on whether this was to be socially accepted by them or not. Lucky for the girl, Seungyeon, she was part of the popular type of groups. She had the typical look of long dark brown hair with bangs across her forehead. Her skirt was evidently higher compared to mine, and as mine was not rolled up, I assumed she had rolled her’s up. Her and Seokjin dating would be accepted easier than others. As they sat down together, next to each other, I suddenly felt a cheeky smile grow across my face. Seokjin had gotten a girlfriend right after I had made him realise how people see him. A player. He was afraid… and no one except me knew of the truth. Somehow, it made me sort of smug, knowing the truth. “Seokjin, is it true then?” A boy chirped.
“Yes, me and Seungyeon are together,” he seemed to announce to the whole classroom, “and we are very happy.” He greasily place his arm around Seunyeon’s shoulder. A few “aww”s and “eww”s followed after that cringing sentence. I just sniggered lightly, which Seokjin seemed to have heard. He looked my way and we caught each other’s eyes. I smiled childishly at him, and he frowned slightly at me, turning back to Seungyeon.
I wanted to feel so excited about how much power I had over Seokjin, but I couldn’t bring myself to be. I felt a sudden sadness fall over me for a couple of seconds, the weight of my heart feeling a lot heavier than before. Why was I not happy?

Back at his house more unwillingly than weeks before, I was writing down noted of our first experiment, only hearing the noise of my pen scribbling. The silence somehow describing my current feelings towards Seokjin, annoyed. He was supposed to do this experiment on his own, but he texted me saying he had “accidentally spent too much time with Seungyeon,” the day before our get together.
“Here’s the first one done.” I said finishing off the analysis of the experiment. “But next time you really need to organise your time better. It’s been mostly my work, and I need you to focus.” Just when I had started to get into my ranting, I turned around to see Seokjin stupidly smiling at his phone, texting someone. I sighed and raised my eyebrow. Needless to say, it was Seungyeon he was texting. “Look I get it, relationships need time too, but so does school work!” I said starting to get angry about this girl intervening in the project.
“Are you jealous right now?” He asked with a cheeky smile on his face.
“You wish…” I crossed my arms, muttering.
“Come on Wonah, I know you have a thing for me~” he said dragging the end of the word making me even more annoyed. A thing for me?! I opened my mouth to start shouting at him, but I closed it knowing it wouldn’t do the idiot any good. I stood up abruptly leading myself to the bathroom once again to calm myself down. As I go to open the door out of his bedroom, I find Seokjin behind me. He shoves the door back closed with a loud thump and before I can say anything he grabs my wrists and pushes me up against the door. My weak wrists being no match for him, I try to push and push against him, but with every push he just seems to be coming closer to my face. His legs even coming closer and restricting my leg movement. His torso finding contact with mine, making my skin feel hyper sensitive to his touch. “Seokjin, what are you doing?!” I say breathlessly with my heart racing. I find myself just staring at his eyes, being transfixed by them. As I stop resisting slowly, Seokjin smiles softly at me. This idiot actually has a nice smile?
“I know you like me Wonah, every girl has.” He says smoothly as he blinks slowly. What have I got myself into? Why have I relaxed?
“We’ve been through this Seokjin, I’m not normal, remember?” I finally release my eyes off his and start resisting again.
“Well I like you Wonah.” Did he just say… I look back in his eyes, not sure of whether I believe him or not. He smiles more as if to encourage me, but all it does is make me uneasy. He’s got a girlfriend! What is he doing right now?
“Shutup you idiot, and let me go!” I use all my energy left to push up against his over powering arms, but it did just as much as what got me here in the first place. He pushes me back harder than before slightly slamming my wrists against the door.
“NO! Not until you admit you care about my new girlfriend!” He raised his voice to me.
“Why would I care about who you date?!” I quickly retort back without thinking. Silence follows and I see his once slightly angry eyebrows loosen up. He gives me a hurt look. Why has he made me act this way? How has he made me act this way? “Seokjin- I-“ I start stuttering out as his hold releases slightly and slowly his touch leaves me. I almost miss it immediately as he steps back.
“You can go when you want. I know you don’t exactly want to be here. Sorry for always making you feel this way.” He says looking down at the carpet that covers his bedroom floor. He’s never acted this way before, so shy. My heart drops when I hear this. Who said I didn’t want to be here? I mean I don’t want to be, but I do!
“We arn’t done here yet! We still have work to do. Don’t go making excuses again Seokjin.” I find myself saying. I sit back down and grab my pen, hoping to encourage Seokjin to sit down and forget this ever happened. As he slowly sits back down I write stuff down again, left feeling awkward. What just happened?

Notes

gahhh I forgot to upload yesterdayyyy
Sorry for the delay! Here's the next chapter!
Hope you guys enjoy it as usual and i'll see you guys, hopefully, soon!