Lets Not Fall in love.

~a few weeks later~
It had been routine, I was spending time spontaneously both at Choi’s apartment and the club upon my request. I felt safer that way, well, I did for a while.

‘’Them building within close hearing range isn’t going to keep my hands off of you. I don’t care if they hear.’’ We hadn’t done the full on. Just me staying in his lap as he kissed me and touched me, and he would go so far as to put his hands up my shirt and massage me until I asked him to stop, I was glad that he listened. He didn’t assume that I was a virgin, he just assumed that I wasn’t ready to handle him. And in truth, I probably wasn’t. or at least, I didn’t think I was… until now.~

‘’Damn.’’ I frowned at myself. It was early in the morning on Saturday my first off day since starting my job. I had accidentally knocked over my favorite Music box, a petal from the amaryllis flower had bent and the winder thingie was now lodged into it. It was my favorite. But I would talk to my uncle Ken to get it fixed probably. Hansol had met Hyungwon a few weeks ago and despite my facial expressions and discomfort, he was glad that Juniper was coming out of his shell and making friends. So.. Hyungwon was in the next room. He had spent the night.

I found out that he was a momma’s boy. He loved my mother and had gotten along with her and gotten to her with his charm and charisma. It had almost worked on me, almost. But I had to admit. I felt guilty. I had gotten close to him. Let him rest his head on my shoulder as he watched me and my mom make dinner. Let him into my room to sit on my bed when he and my brother were trying to annoy me. But it just turned into a goofy teenage laugh fest. He was sweet, funny. And the conversation would be good until he would bring up Big Bang.

‘’So what are you now, their pet?’’ he would ask me. And I would stare at him. ‘’you’re not dumb enough to give your body up to some gang. I can tell you respect yourself more than that.’’ He said. And I would respond. ‘’No, I’m not their pet.’’ I had admitted that I was sort of Choi’s girlfriend. I mean. It was his gang that had rescued me from Monsta X…. But it was Hyungwon that had purposely let me escape.

‘’my brother told me about him. And so did his friend. Jiho.’’ I had remembered pausing when he said the name. we were sitting on the back porch while Hansol played low jazz and make smoothies in the Kitchen, Juniper had decided to help him for the sake of interaction.

‘’Say that name again.’’ I said turning to him, he looked up into my eyes and frowned Slightly. ‘’Jiho. Woo jiho.’’ He mumbled. I found myself scooting away from him. ‘’How do you know him?’’ I asked curiously. ‘’You know him? What are you, an adrenaline junkie?’’ he asked me. To which I shook my head rapidly. Because if they knew the man that Choi had mentioned not that long ago, shouldn’t I calling Choi or telling my brother to stay away from him? Or… how would I do that without finding a good enough reason on how I knew he was bad.

‘’No, but I erm- heard the name.’’
‘’from your boyfriend?’’ he asked with a small smirk as he teased me. I felt myself blush and look down. ‘’I heard it from him, yeah.’’ Hyungwon sighed and sat back.

‘’So.. you’re like his girlfriend, really?’’ he asked, dodging the question I had asked before hand. And I shrugged. ‘’I guess so, yeah.’’ He just blew out some air and looked up at the dark sky.
‘’That’s too bad.’’ He murmured and perked up like nothing was wrong when my brother came out with our cups. And that was that night. Him asking us about cali and our old school and old friends. Stuff like that. I was actually comfortable around him. I liked him.~

I picked up my music box off the floor and placed it in the drawer for safe keeping so no further damage could come to it. Then I grabbed my stuff to go take a shower.

The bathroom door opened the same time my bedroom door opened. And a shirtless, sleepy Hyungwon walked out. His toned chest slightly misty, evidence that he had just gotten out of the shower. But then I let my eyes raise, and the wet hair was a giveaway as well. He still looked sleepy, but angelic. I shyly bid him good morning and he smiled back while running a hand through his damp hair. Something in my chest tightened as he looked over me with curious eyes.

‘’hey.’’ He smiled back. And I couldn’t help but stare at him. I just- I don’t know.
So I made a few conscious decisions, right then, right there. Reckless, but conscious decisions.

Notes