Please Don't Get Too Friendly
Debut Showcase Part II
Breath in, breath out. Breath in, breath out. I let my voice flow out just like I had practiced, ignoring the whispers of the crowd. Ignoring the 5 thousand people's eyes on me. The piano began, and I felt myself, like so many times before, being transported into a place that felt lonely and hurtful, but had once been treasured and cherished.
Mianhae mianhae hajima
Naega chorahaeji janha
Although I know you will never feel sorry, I'd rather you not be
Ppalgan yeppeun ipsullo
Eoseo nareul jugigo ga
Naneun gwaenchanha
I really am trying to be fine, but what you did killed me already
Majimageuro nareul barabwajwo
Amureohji anheun deut useojwo
Just like how it was before. Can't be it all be just like before?
Nega bogo sipeul ttae
Giokhal su itge
Naui meoreotsoge ne eolgul
Geureol su itge
I don't want to just remember a cold back telling me I'm hated. Just smile to me
Neol bonael su opneun naui yoksimi
Jibchagi dweeo neol gadwotgo
Was that how you felt? So obsessed over my father that I had to be dragged into it as well?
Hoksi ireon na ttaeme himddeureotni
Amu daedap eobneun neo
You won't ever talk to me again, will you? I still hope I didn't hurt you with my carelessness
Babocheoreom wae
Neoreul jiuji mothae
Neon tteonabeoryeotneunde
I really am a fool. I think about you everyday, but you don't care at all
Neoui nun, ko, ib
Nal manjideon ne singil
Jageun sontopkkaji da
Yeojeonhi neul neukkil su itjiman
You warmness towards me, even if it was fake, it was my everything. I held on to it so bad.
Kkeojin bulkkotcheoreom tadeureogabeorin
Uri sarang modu da
Neomu apeujiman ijen neol
Chueogira bureulge
Yes it hurts, just thinking about how it was all destroyed so easily. But I don't have a choice anymore, do I?
Every fiber of my being vibrated with sadness and loneliness throughout the song, although I still managed to feel a bit of happiness as I thought of all the good memories I had with her. I had written this song two months beforehand, when I had been all alone in the practice room. The words had come to me first; Seo Hyun helped me find the melody and I had completed it in 3 days and a half. I had brought it to the Producer, to try recording it. He had loved it so much he began immediately searching for a professionnal pianist to accompany me and create the whole version of the song. A week after, I had already begun practicing with the pianist. Now that I was performing it in front of the crowd, I felt tears of mixed feelings come up, but I forced them down as I shifted the emotions I felt towards my voice. At the end, I could see some people crying or just looking sober and thoughtful, completely on the opposite of how they had reacted to my member's solos. For about 5 seconds after the last note, nothing moved. We could have heard a fly. But then everyone applauded and cheered, making my heart explode with joy and relief. I smiled proudly and walked off the stage, to hug my members that were also crying. Before I could stop it, I felt a tear fall down my cheek and I wiped it quickly before it could smudge off the hard work of the stylists. We all got quickly prepared and dressed up for our first public group performance. Our first song was called 'Up & Down' and it was mostly written to brighten the mood after my performance. The dance was easy to learn yet it was still nice to look and had a little challenge added to it as we had to make it look as good as the choreographer had imagined. "Sexy, powerful but also playful" were his exact words. And that's exactly how we practiced it, and performed it afterwards. After the song, it was finally the turn for our MC, EXO's Suho, to appear and do what MCs in debut showcases do: ask us personal questions and make the public know abou tus more, while making us slightly awkward and shy. 5 chairs got put out on the stage Under the applauds of the crowd once we went to sit on them, but it went completely crazy when Suho appeared. Fans were screaming his name all over the place and we didn't know how to react. After the cheers had calmed down a little, he finally got to introduce us officially to the public and ask us the usual, funny questions that made us embarassed, but laugh. As the whole showcase had already been lasting for more than 45 minutes and we had a time limit of an hour, we were told we had to speed things up a bit and that Suho needed to go backstage for the final segment. I looked to my members in confusion, but they were all just wearing a secretive smileon their faces and that's when I realized that I was the only one ignoring everything about the 'surprise'. I looked around, searching for clues, and then every light above us shut down, leaving everything in complete blackness. More confused than ever, I turned around to look at the screen behind us and I realized a film was had just begun.
Living At Our Dorm
~~October 21st, 2015~~
"Hey everyone! I'm Seo Hyun and I'm one the future members of TetrA! I hope you are all doing well. It's already this cold in October, please make sure to wear a thick coat and a scarf. We wouldn't want you to be sick, right? Right now, I'm waiting for my other members to arrive. From what I think, Amy will be the second one to arrive, maybe with our manager. The two of them are really close, after all. I've seen them together a few times, they look like mother and daughter! But anyways, since I was the first one left with the camera, I guess I have to introduce this to you. The CEO asked us to film ourselves, every 21st of the month, until our debut date, January 21st! I think it's pretty cool. But we can't tell our leader about it, because it's like a surprise for her. It's to congratulate her for having worked so hard and endured everything so well for the past months. Amy, you did well! Thank you for everything! Oh, you all might be wondering how we know she's going to work hard. Well, it's pretty simple: if you know her on a personal basis, you will get to know quickly that she isn't the type to give up on anything. She'll bear everything on her own until she breaks. That kind of saddens me actually, but even if I tell her... Oh! I see their van coming! I got to go, see you later and I love you all! Goodbye!"
Black screen. ~~November 21st~~
"Okay, so now it's my turn I guess. Uhm... Hi, I'm Seung Hye. I'm the second youngest member and... I think that's pretty much it about me. Today is November 21st, exactly a month after the first video of Seo Hyun... unnie, and I don't really know what to do since all the members are still sleeping. I guess we can go see them together right? They still look pretty while sleeping, so I don't think they'll get angry at me. Guys, it's okay right? Well, it's too late. So first, here is Ji Yoon's adorable sleeping face. She really looks like a baby when she sleeps. She makes no noise at all, doesn't move around much... The best roomate ever. I'm sorry if I'm cold to you, but that's just the image I've decided for myself. And don't worry, no matter what you do, I'll always support you, even if I don't show through my actions. Oh... Since you might be crying while this is broadcasted, I'll stop the touching moment to move on to the unnies' room. So, on the right, we have Seo Hyun unnie. She looks kind of like a model, which is unfair. She's already pretty in real life, how can she be as beautiful when she sleeps? Aren't people supposed to be ugly when they sleep? Ugh... Anyways. I guess you're the one I haven't spoken too much with yet, so I don't know how to judge you. But from what I saw, you're tolerant and patient, which is good for my personnality. Let's get along well! And finally, on the left, here is our leader, Amy unnie!"
Everything stayed silent for a while, and we could hear her breath heavily.
"You... We haven't started off on a good basis, and it's partially my fault, so... I think you understand. Other than that... I'm actually kind of jealous of you, because you always seem so happy-go-lucky with everything, but I've seen you breakdown before, so I know it wouldn't be fair of me to say that you have an easy life. You've never had an easy life. You just lived through every misfortune that showed up in front up you and sucked it up, which is horrible. No one should have aver gone through waht you did, wether it be in the past or recent events that ocurred. I... kind of admire you, maybe? But I won't ever tell you that again, so i hope you listened well. Uhm, yeah, that's it. Thank you for listening everyone, and see you all officially in January!"
Black screen again. ~~December 21st~~
"Hello! I'm Ji Yoon, the maknae of TetrA! Please treat us well! First of all, I wanted to wish you all a Merry Christmas! As we won't be filming anything during the 24th or 25th, I thought it would be good to do it now? Oh, well... We decided to spend some of the holidays together and Amy unnie is preparing some treats right now, it smells really good! Let's go down, shall we?"
Ji Yoon walked down the stairs softly and stood silently in the living room, fiming my back preparing doughnuts while humming a Christmas song.
"She looks in a really good mood. I want to help, but she told us to stay upstairs. Maybe she wants to surprise us? Thank you unnie! I'm sure everything will be delicious! I'll now go back upstairs before she catches me. Thank you all for listening, I love you and see you in a month!"
Black screen. We heard a plugging sound and all of a sudden, EXO's nine members' faces appeared and everyone went wild.
"Hello everyone! We're EXO and we're happy to present to you our new friends, TetrA! We were able to see how much they worked for the past months on themselves and pushed themselves to their limits. It was painful but admirable to see. Especially you, Amy, we hope you won't ever be like that again. Please have some consideration for your friend who are forced to stand by and Watch you, okay? Thank you very much!" greeted Suho.
"Now, you might all be wondering why we're here with you today! I shall relieve all confusion and panick already!" announced loudly Chanyeol, taking the camera. "We were invited to live the last 10 minutes with you all and perform a limited-edition short concert with TetrA here! And of course, we gladly accepted. Aren't you all happy we did? Okay, we're coming to meet you soon! Wait a bit please," he said as he closed the camera.
Everything stood still and I kept my back to the crowd, unable to move. Tears were flowing on their own on my face, and I couldn't stop them to save my life. The stage coordinator noticed my situation and sent a stylist to retouch my washed off makeup. It was quickly done and, after thanking them and turning around again, I notcied that all my members were standing in front of me. I held back the threatening tears again and smiled at them brightly. I got up, hugged them and, as if on cue, EXO came up on the stage and everything went rowdy for the last 10 minutes. We had the time to perfom Call Me Baby, El Dorado, Love Me Right and Lightsaber, going over sligthly the 1 hour allowed. But as EXO were creting such a commotion, I don't think anyone minded the extra money.
~~1 week later~~
"Oh my God guysI can't believe it! Our debut showcase was the most viewed video on the Internet this week! And it topped the charts as 'Hottest Event of the Month'! This is amazing!" shouted an overly excited Seung Hye across the dorm.
We all ran over to her room and watched the news opened on her laptop. We all screamed in excitement and jumped everywhere. But secretely, I was thinking...
Maybe it won't take too long after all. Wait a bit more, Chanyeol!
Mianhae mianhae hajima
Naega chorahaeji janha
Although I know you will never feel sorry, I'd rather you not be
Ppalgan yeppeun ipsullo
Eoseo nareul jugigo ga
Naneun gwaenchanha
I really am trying to be fine, but what you did killed me already
Majimageuro nareul barabwajwo
Amureohji anheun deut useojwo
Just like how it was before. Can't be it all be just like before?
Nega bogo sipeul ttae
Giokhal su itge
Naui meoreotsoge ne eolgul
Geureol su itge
I don't want to just remember a cold back telling me I'm hated. Just smile to me
Neol bonael su opneun naui yoksimi
Jibchagi dweeo neol gadwotgo
Was that how you felt? So obsessed over my father that I had to be dragged into it as well?
Hoksi ireon na ttaeme himddeureotni
Amu daedap eobneun neo
You won't ever talk to me again, will you? I still hope I didn't hurt you with my carelessness
Babocheoreom wae
Neoreul jiuji mothae
Neon tteonabeoryeotneunde
I really am a fool. I think about you everyday, but you don't care at all
Neoui nun, ko, ib
Nal manjideon ne singil
Jageun sontopkkaji da
Yeojeonhi neul neukkil su itjiman
You warmness towards me, even if it was fake, it was my everything. I held on to it so bad.
Kkeojin bulkkotcheoreom tadeureogabeorin
Uri sarang modu da
Neomu apeujiman ijen neol
Chueogira bureulge
Yes it hurts, just thinking about how it was all destroyed so easily. But I don't have a choice anymore, do I?
Every fiber of my being vibrated with sadness and loneliness throughout the song, although I still managed to feel a bit of happiness as I thought of all the good memories I had with her. I had written this song two months beforehand, when I had been all alone in the practice room. The words had come to me first; Seo Hyun helped me find the melody and I had completed it in 3 days and a half. I had brought it to the Producer, to try recording it. He had loved it so much he began immediately searching for a professionnal pianist to accompany me and create the whole version of the song. A week after, I had already begun practicing with the pianist. Now that I was performing it in front of the crowd, I felt tears of mixed feelings come up, but I forced them down as I shifted the emotions I felt towards my voice. At the end, I could see some people crying or just looking sober and thoughtful, completely on the opposite of how they had reacted to my member's solos. For about 5 seconds after the last note, nothing moved. We could have heard a fly. But then everyone applauded and cheered, making my heart explode with joy and relief. I smiled proudly and walked off the stage, to hug my members that were also crying. Before I could stop it, I felt a tear fall down my cheek and I wiped it quickly before it could smudge off the hard work of the stylists. We all got quickly prepared and dressed up for our first public group performance. Our first song was called 'Up & Down' and it was mostly written to brighten the mood after my performance. The dance was easy to learn yet it was still nice to look and had a little challenge added to it as we had to make it look as good as the choreographer had imagined. "Sexy, powerful but also playful" were his exact words. And that's exactly how we practiced it, and performed it afterwards. After the song, it was finally the turn for our MC, EXO's Suho, to appear and do what MCs in debut showcases do: ask us personal questions and make the public know abou tus more, while making us slightly awkward and shy. 5 chairs got put out on the stage Under the applauds of the crowd once we went to sit on them, but it went completely crazy when Suho appeared. Fans were screaming his name all over the place and we didn't know how to react. After the cheers had calmed down a little, he finally got to introduce us officially to the public and ask us the usual, funny questions that made us embarassed, but laugh. As the whole showcase had already been lasting for more than 45 minutes and we had a time limit of an hour, we were told we had to speed things up a bit and that Suho needed to go backstage for the final segment. I looked to my members in confusion, but they were all just wearing a secretive smileon their faces and that's when I realized that I was the only one ignoring everything about the 'surprise'. I looked around, searching for clues, and then every light above us shut down, leaving everything in complete blackness. More confused than ever, I turned around to look at the screen behind us and I realized a film was had just begun.
Living At Our Dorm
~~October 21st, 2015~~
"Hey everyone! I'm Seo Hyun and I'm one the future members of TetrA! I hope you are all doing well. It's already this cold in October, please make sure to wear a thick coat and a scarf. We wouldn't want you to be sick, right? Right now, I'm waiting for my other members to arrive. From what I think, Amy will be the second one to arrive, maybe with our manager. The two of them are really close, after all. I've seen them together a few times, they look like mother and daughter! But anyways, since I was the first one left with the camera, I guess I have to introduce this to you. The CEO asked us to film ourselves, every 21st of the month, until our debut date, January 21st! I think it's pretty cool. But we can't tell our leader about it, because it's like a surprise for her. It's to congratulate her for having worked so hard and endured everything so well for the past months. Amy, you did well! Thank you for everything! Oh, you all might be wondering how we know she's going to work hard. Well, it's pretty simple: if you know her on a personal basis, you will get to know quickly that she isn't the type to give up on anything. She'll bear everything on her own until she breaks. That kind of saddens me actually, but even if I tell her... Oh! I see their van coming! I got to go, see you later and I love you all! Goodbye!"
Black screen. ~~November 21st~~
"Okay, so now it's my turn I guess. Uhm... Hi, I'm Seung Hye. I'm the second youngest member and... I think that's pretty much it about me. Today is November 21st, exactly a month after the first video of Seo Hyun... unnie, and I don't really know what to do since all the members are still sleeping. I guess we can go see them together right? They still look pretty while sleeping, so I don't think they'll get angry at me. Guys, it's okay right? Well, it's too late. So first, here is Ji Yoon's adorable sleeping face. She really looks like a baby when she sleeps. She makes no noise at all, doesn't move around much... The best roomate ever. I'm sorry if I'm cold to you, but that's just the image I've decided for myself. And don't worry, no matter what you do, I'll always support you, even if I don't show through my actions. Oh... Since you might be crying while this is broadcasted, I'll stop the touching moment to move on to the unnies' room. So, on the right, we have Seo Hyun unnie. She looks kind of like a model, which is unfair. She's already pretty in real life, how can she be as beautiful when she sleeps? Aren't people supposed to be ugly when they sleep? Ugh... Anyways. I guess you're the one I haven't spoken too much with yet, so I don't know how to judge you. But from what I saw, you're tolerant and patient, which is good for my personnality. Let's get along well! And finally, on the left, here is our leader, Amy unnie!"
Everything stayed silent for a while, and we could hear her breath heavily.
"You... We haven't started off on a good basis, and it's partially my fault, so... I think you understand. Other than that... I'm actually kind of jealous of you, because you always seem so happy-go-lucky with everything, but I've seen you breakdown before, so I know it wouldn't be fair of me to say that you have an easy life. You've never had an easy life. You just lived through every misfortune that showed up in front up you and sucked it up, which is horrible. No one should have aver gone through waht you did, wether it be in the past or recent events that ocurred. I... kind of admire you, maybe? But I won't ever tell you that again, so i hope you listened well. Uhm, yeah, that's it. Thank you for listening everyone, and see you all officially in January!"
Black screen again. ~~December 21st~~
"Hello! I'm Ji Yoon, the maknae of TetrA! Please treat us well! First of all, I wanted to wish you all a Merry Christmas! As we won't be filming anything during the 24th or 25th, I thought it would be good to do it now? Oh, well... We decided to spend some of the holidays together and Amy unnie is preparing some treats right now, it smells really good! Let's go down, shall we?"
Ji Yoon walked down the stairs softly and stood silently in the living room, fiming my back preparing doughnuts while humming a Christmas song.
"She looks in a really good mood. I want to help, but she told us to stay upstairs. Maybe she wants to surprise us? Thank you unnie! I'm sure everything will be delicious! I'll now go back upstairs before she catches me. Thank you all for listening, I love you and see you in a month!"
Black screen. We heard a plugging sound and all of a sudden, EXO's nine members' faces appeared and everyone went wild.
"Hello everyone! We're EXO and we're happy to present to you our new friends, TetrA! We were able to see how much they worked for the past months on themselves and pushed themselves to their limits. It was painful but admirable to see. Especially you, Amy, we hope you won't ever be like that again. Please have some consideration for your friend who are forced to stand by and Watch you, okay? Thank you very much!" greeted Suho.
"Now, you might all be wondering why we're here with you today! I shall relieve all confusion and panick already!" announced loudly Chanyeol, taking the camera. "We were invited to live the last 10 minutes with you all and perform a limited-edition short concert with TetrA here! And of course, we gladly accepted. Aren't you all happy we did? Okay, we're coming to meet you soon! Wait a bit please," he said as he closed the camera.
Everything stood still and I kept my back to the crowd, unable to move. Tears were flowing on their own on my face, and I couldn't stop them to save my life. The stage coordinator noticed my situation and sent a stylist to retouch my washed off makeup. It was quickly done and, after thanking them and turning around again, I notcied that all my members were standing in front of me. I held back the threatening tears again and smiled at them brightly. I got up, hugged them and, as if on cue, EXO came up on the stage and everything went rowdy for the last 10 minutes. We had the time to perfom Call Me Baby, El Dorado, Love Me Right and Lightsaber, going over sligthly the 1 hour allowed. But as EXO were creting such a commotion, I don't think anyone minded the extra money.
~~1 week later~~
"Oh my God guysI can't believe it! Our debut showcase was the most viewed video on the Internet this week! And it topped the charts as 'Hottest Event of the Month'! This is amazing!" shouted an overly excited Seung Hye across the dorm.
We all ran over to her room and watched the news opened on her laptop. We all screamed in excitement and jumped everywhere. But secretely, I was thinking...
Maybe it won't take too long after all. Wait a bit more, Chanyeol!
Notes
Hi! It's late, I have to go to sleep, I have to practice for my oral in two days, I'm tired, my knee hurts... But this story is almost finished! I think this chapter was the longest one I ever wrote. I still hope you liked it! The next will be... THE LAST ONE!!! O.O Can you even believe it? I wanted to start wonderful comments, but I'll leave that for the next chapter ;) Thank you guys so much for reading this story and supporting it, it touches me a lot! Thank you for amazing me over and over again :)
Please don't hesitate to comment and vote you r thoughts on this story, it's really encouraging!
We'll see each other soon again, and as always...
Sranghae :) <3<3<3<3
@Lounara9
Hahaha thank you so much! I'm sorry for ending it though, but don't be too sad, I'm currently thinking up the other fanfic I was planning and I'm considering posting it starting next week or in two weeks :)
2/4/16