But You Love Me

*Library study session*

“You’re on page 25 already?”
Seokjin stares at me in surprise from across the table.
“Oh well… this book is really good for revision.” I try to cover up my nerd ways poking out for people to see. He laughs slightly before his eyes switch over to something on the table. I look in the direction but all there is is my wrist. Oh shit.
“What’s that?”
I pull it towards my lap but he’s faster and grabs it pressing on my small wound hurting it. As I release my pull he looks at it more carefully. “Was this Yoongi?” He says emotionlessly. I’m taken aback by Seokjin’s sudden personality change.
“I-I just wanted to talk to him about the club.”
“WHY DO YOU EVEN TALK TO HIM?!”
I jump slightly as Seokjin’s sudden yell which makes heads turn from every corner of the library. His expression loosens as he realises the commotion he has caused. He lets my wrist go clearing his throat. “Seokjin-ah, he’s got the lowest grades ever. I feel kinda bad for him.” I say calmly knowing Seokjin isn’t one to fight back. He gives me a hurt expression as if me caring actually affected him emotionally. “He’s done so much shit to you I just wanna look out for you.” He says softly in his caring voice I love. I smile softly at his affectionate statement. He looks down as if he was a puppy who’d just gotten told off. “The past is the past, we can’t change that. Forgive and forget, you know?”
He stifles a laugh and looks at me with a smile that shows me he wishes I wasn’t so nice to everyone. “So, you and him… do you guys have some sort of past?”
I stop writing awkwardly. I look up at him again quickly replying,”no…”
After that the session was quiet for the rest of it. Seokjin didn’t question why I acted so weird in answering him, but I felt he knew Yoongi and I were more than just newly made enemies.

————————————————————————————————————————————————

The bell rings out and I look to my friend with hope. “Just come for ten minutes or something! I know your grades are amazing but-“
“Sorry Saeyong-ah, I have commitments to go to,” Hyemin says sadly to me. As I sigh she waves silently and walks away. Getting people to join the club has been extra hard since word went around Yoongi “attended” the club. Of course, Bangtan have been denying it, giving shit to whoever believes in it.
A hand grabs my shoulder softly and I turn to see Seokjin behind me watching Hyemin walk away. “Come on Saeyong-ah, let’s go study,” he says trying to lift my spirit. I paste a smile on my face and we start walking towards the classroom.
“What are you gonna study?”
I stare at my different coloured books all belonging to different subjects.
“Hmm… i’ve been studying a lot of science lately, some history would be good,” I say selecting the thick, blue book our of my pile of books. “What about you?”
“Oh? umm, I’m gonna study History too,” Seokjin says to me grabbing his history book while shooting me his famous eye smile. I smile back because, how could you not?
As we both get into our studying, and were in a focussed zone, I hear Miss Yang’s voice in the hallway getting closer and closer. “Keep moving Yoongi.” As I hear her say that name, my heart immediately speeds up and look over to Seokjin to see if he’s noticed. He gives me an annoyed look, telling me, he’s definitely noticed.
The door slams open at this point and I flick my head to see the one and only… Yoongi. I self-conciously touch my bandage covering my hand feeling both happy and angry he’s here. “I get it miss, you can go,” he says shrugging his shoulders up making his bag lift and fall with it. Meanwhile Miss Yang is standing at the front of the classroom crossed armed and angrier than usual.
“If you get it, have a seat.”
Yoongi gives out a big sigh and seats himself next to me on my left. I watch him until he sits down in the desk before I look down at my book again. He’s actually here, and I don’t know how I feel. Why has Yoongi always been able to mess up my emotions like this? Satisfied, Miss Yang looks at me and nods before leaving the room. The slam of the door then starts the awkward silence between the three of us. I look over to Seokjin to see he has completely ignored Yoongi’s entrance and is studying. Out of the corner of my eye I see Yoongi looking in the opposite direction. I take this opportunity to have a look at him only to make things worse. I find myself looking at his face features. First his eyes, then his nose… then his lips. My cheeks burn up and I remember the close “kiss" incident. Somehow he noticed this and turned around to see me staring. “What?!” He says loudly shaking me out of my stare and back into the classroom. I clear my throat dodging his eye line before resuming my work. Thump! I hear a book drop on the desk left to me. Yoongi brought a book? I look over to see what he’s doing. When I realise the book I smile slightly. It’s the book I gave him at the library. He actually got it out? And is studying? I scoff slightly remembering what he’s done to me these past few weeks, he’s made my school life turn upside down. But somehow I manage to be more happy seeing he acknowledged my opinion, and took the book to study. The one thing Yoongi has always been able to make me: confused.

Notes

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