Gratefulness~ pt.4

I haven't heard of Sara for a couple of days now. I guess she's having too much fun with her new friend... Instead, I bump into Cecily in the hallway when I'm leaving the acrobatics class. She grabs my bag to stop me and greets me cheerfully. I'm looking for the manager that has been hanging around me to get my dinner he was supposed to go and get me but since he's nowhere to be seen I can have a little chat with Cecily.
"How are you nowadays?" I ask because the night she almost jumped in the black water comes to my mind. I was so scared. I have really gotten to experience lots of things that are new to me after moving out from the woods, I think to myself.
"Fine," she sneers oddly and it doesn't sound right. I look her in the eyes.
"You are not lying, aren't you?" I ask with a serious expression.
"Hmmh," she sighs and takes a look around us.
"I'm just not going to let any men in my life from now on," she smiles akwardly. I shake my head.
"I know how you must feel, believe me..."
"I'm just not completely over it yet. But at least I won't do the same mistake again."
"Yeah, and don't let the past control you," I touch his arm. "Your future can be happy, even if your past wasn't."
She looks at me with gratefulness, frowning.
"I could tell you my story but it's something like yours. Still, I am happy now," I smile. "After all, people will be chasing the feeling of being loved."
"Hmm...?"
"And just even a little while of that... A moment you don't know when it's going to come to an end, it is worth it," I'm deep in my thoughts but then I look at her. "Don't be afraid. You'll get over it."
I let her arm loose and then I look at the end of the hallway but the manager is still not here. Cecily can't say a word anymore. We start slowly walking towards the hall. But in the silence I can hear her thanking me, hoping that my words are true.

After the last practices I walk outside of the building and get in a familiar car. The manager didn't have time to drive me to the dorm because he was busy with another trainee although he promised me because of the heavy rain.
"Annyeong haseyo, Young Baessi," I smile as I peek inside and see his smiling face looking back at me. I sit down and take papers from my bag to go through the lyrics I've written quickly before tomorrow's check-up.
"It's getting closer," Tae looks at me and the pile of papers.
"Hmh?" I glance at him.
"The group forming?"
"Ah, yeah," I understand. "It's exciting." I'm so tired and it's late so I don't have energy to have an interesting conversation with him.
As we get to the dorm, Tae comes to open the door for me, holding an umbrella over us, but I notice something weird. YB is biting his lower lip like he was holding back something.
"Young Bae," I say loudly and stare into his eyes that are trying to look at anything else but me. He pushes the door and then glances at me akwardly.
"What?" he tries to act innocent.
"You clearly have something to say so why won't you just say it?"
"No. Well..." he mutters and utters a small laughter. I give him a serious look.
"A little accident happened today," Tae grins streching the letter i.
"An accident?" I'm not sure what to expect.
"Yeeah," he grins again. "Seungri kind of told YG that you two are dating..."
"No," I gasp. Seungri will hear from this!
"Yep. Damn, Seungri!" Taeyang laughs it off. I laugh akwardly. It's way too early to announce anything and what if somebody asks about it YG tells the truth and then it's out there. Or would he do it? I hope he will ask for our opinion first.
"What if soon everyone knows?" I worry.
"Umm, lots of people know about it already," Tae thinks this is just funny..
"But that's a big thing for Ji Yong!"
"Well, you've been dating for a while," he just smiles calmly and pats me on my back.
"Should I be worried?" I look at him ashamed. Ji Yong's fans will be shocked if YG says anything.
"I don't think so," he smiles. "He's not a young boy anymore and his fans are more mature too."
"But all the younger fans..." I keep making akward faces.
"Just, don't worry," he tries to calm me down.
"But Ji Yong loves his fans more than anything. I can't --"
"Still, Minea-ah," he makes me shut my mouth and comes close to my face. "It's okay!"
"Really?" I sigh.
"I think this will be only a good thing for the industry. If he dates, then anyone can date."
"If you say so," I try not to worry so much and smile instead.
We start walking to the door.
"I remember when I saw you at the backstage of our concert. And now you've almost an idol," Tae laughs by himself. I nudge him with my elbow.
"There's still a long way to go before I get to debut," I note. "I don't even know the other group members yet and then it's going to take us time to train together. And it's not sure that we will debut but you know..."
"True but I believe in you. Hyun Suk is so excited. I think I've never seen him so excited before," he says.
"Really?" I laugh.
"Really. You gotta enjoy this time before the group and debuting because, believe me, it's not going to be easy. Maintaining your good image and everything."
I have basically ruined it already, I think to myself.
"By the way," I begin. "Do you have any idea why we are forming the group so quickly? Has something gotten to YG? I feel like I'm not ready for this yet..."
"You can never be ready enough," says the man who was a trainee hundred times longer than me. He checks that no one's here watching us and whispers to my ear:
"I think 2NE1 is disbanding," he presses a finger on his lips to indicate that I should never talk about this to anyone.
"Disbanding? Really?"
Tae shrugs.
"I think YG wants to debut new girls groups to replace them. But he never tells us anything so I don't know what's going on. Anyway, they can't be replaced but I think you know what I mean."
"Yeah... Wow. I never though it could actually happen. I hope not... Well, if it's so, nothing lasts forever," I mutter. They have a long and successful history. I should contact Chaerin some day, I think to myself.
Tae smiles and nods.
"But yeah! Good luck for the next era," he smiles and I smile back at him.
"Thank you, a lot. I will do my best," I promise as I use the key card and open the front door.
"And have fun in Finland!" Tae yells before the door closes.
"Of course, I will!"

Notes

Teaser for chapter 32