Yerim’s POV

“I am home.” I entered home, really exhausted. Later, I realized umma was not at home as usual. I sighed. 30 minutes later I heard a thud.

“Yerim… I am home.” I heard her voice from the lounge.

I left my room and went to the kitchen. “Umma… I am really hungry… where were you?”

“Omo…” she opened my empty lunch box. “You’ve grown up.” She smiled at me with motherly affection.

“Umm…” I nodded.

“Has your appetite grown as well?” She smirked.

“Just make me any thing.” I stepped towards my room.

“Wait Yerim, are you… perhaps still mad at me?” She asked while looking elsewhere, trying to avoid direct eye contact while I was staring right into her eyes with a slight glare.

“I am going to my room.” I went to my room.

“YERIM!” She started knocking at my door. “Yerim… why are you being so rude to your umma? I have no one except you! Yerim…”

I didn’t open the door even after hearing her sob. I just couldn't forgive her for pushing me into darkness of ignorance. I lived my 16 years in brainlessness; accepting all the lies, believing in my dreams, even having lots of dreams, eager to find love.


Flashback (3 months ago)

“Yerim…” Umma came home late. “Happy Birthday.” She wished me and ran to give me warm hug. I hugged back.

“Umma…”

“My daughter’s now 16 and look what I got for you?” She smirked.

“Umma… I---”

“No wait… here’s your BRAND BRAND new cell phone.”

“Omo… gomawooooo….” I hugged again.

“And here’s your cake.”

“Umma….” I grabbed her hand and made her sit on the chair. I bent and sat down. “Umma… do you… remember what you said about my 16th birthday?”

It was a stabbing reality that I was always mesmerized by the enchanting influence of fairy tales, where most of the times, princess unveils a new mystery or her life completely changes. That’s what happened to me and I really wanted my life to take a 360 turn, but NOT in the way it actually happened.

“W-what? I don’t remember.” She asked while looking elsewhere, trying to avoid direct eye contact while I was staring right into her eyes with full hopes.


While reading a fairy tale about many years ago when I was 6 yrs old, I asked umma about appa. I asked why isnt he with us? How does he look like? Why don’t we have a single picture of him? Does he love me and umma? Upon this many questions, umma told me that he was in Europe and calls her to ask about my progress. That brought a huge smile on my small face. “Really?” I asked and umma nodded. “When will he come to visit us?” I asked again, making umma a little confused. She told me that when I’ll turn 16, my appa will come to see me. since then, I never grew up mentally, living my life in fairy tales, assuming me as a princess.


“So, why didn’t he come? Is …. Is he late?” I asked. “Will… he bring presents for me too?”
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“You need this.” My umma said after slapping me hard.

I just helplessly stared at her with confused and teary eyes.

“How can you believe what I said so long ago!!!” She stood up along with me and shook me while grabbing my arms harshly.

I wanted to cry but sobbed softly.

“You really want to meet your father, who actually abandoned you?”

“Umma…” I sobbed some more tears.

“Yes.” She unheld my arms and turned around, stopping her own rainfall of tears. “I loved him and married him against my parents will.”

Those words were enough to break my whole existence into small glass pieces.

“And now, I cant even go to meet my parents. They will never accept me. It was so heart breaking to live alone. Just because of your father, i lost all my connections.” She said and turned to me, grasping me again. “Yerim… I only have you with me… there’s no one in my life. You’re appa was the most pathetic man ever. I hope…” She wiped away my tears. “I hope… you’ll forget him.”

“U-umma…” I hiccuped. “Can I see just a picture of him?”

She pushed me away with a jerk in disappointment and went to her room. Despite all her hate, she actually had one. As soon as she handed me the picture, I held it tightly and stared at it. *My worst birthday ever* It was supposed to be my best birthday ever. I couldn’t stop the trailing down of tears down my cheek. Umma had already left to her room.

I didn’t take the cell phone as a present, as I gave it back to umma because i really didn't need it.. She didn’t resist and took it. She was pretty mad just to bring back appa’s memories. Before giving it back, I told her that she was responsible for all this, for choosing a wrong person and making me suffer. A space that can never be filled… my appa’s place. That day, my whole life and my perspectives all together altered.

I vowed myself to never fall in love, never have dreams, never accept anything good, never make anymore friends, never believe that the bullying at the school would ever stop. And I DID as I vowed. I became a lifeless shell and I was happy being like that… because my life had peace, it just…. Only just lacked emotions and dreams.
(Flashback ends)

Next Day

I woke up. It was another usual day.

“I’ve packed your lunch.” Umma smiled at me as I entered the kitchen to take it. “Wont you eat breakfast?” She asked.

“Ani.” I replied indifferently.

Her smile vanished. “ok… have a good day.”

“Annyeong.” I left.

The school was again the same, with same old boring teachers, old boring lessons, old boring bullies. But one thing was old and I loved it, Miyoung and our friendship. Despite my lackings, she was always with me. Even when she fell for Howan and started dating him, she never ignored me and gradually another friend entered my life, Howan. I had too many flaws, people could laugh at, but one thing that I was proud of… she was Miyoung; no blood relation but still pure.

“So, have you prepared any dress for the party?” Miyoung asked when we three were walking on the side path, beside the school building.

“Yes.” That was a lie but I didn’t want to make her sad by saying I don’t want to come.

“Cool.” Howan commented.

Suddenly, I left some liquid flowing over my head and then dripping down my shoulder. It smelled like orange juice. Miyoung backed off a bit due to the sudden shock. She looked above.

“Sungyeol.” Without even looking I mouthed the reality. Who else can this be…

“Sungyeol… grow up.” Howan shouted at him.

I, this time, looked above, at the 1st storey’s window. Sungyeol was peeking out. An empty can was titled in his hand, still dropping some juice drops. He laughed hysterically and left.

I lacked so much confidence, that I didn’t even glare at him and rushed to the washroom.

Later when I came out Miyoung blocked my way. “This has to change, and YOU… you’ll change it.”

A smirked appeared over my lips. Was it even possible for me to change now? “You’re right.” I mumbled.

“Lets go then and talk to him.”

“Yeah… umm… but I have to go…. Something’s up.”

“is it urgent? Or are you avoiding?” She glared.

I grinned. “No Miyoung…” I rushed out.

While getting ready to go home, my eyes slid to the temple. I stared at the porch… but the boy I met yesterday didn’t happen to be there. Was that even important to think about it now?? Of course, he had no significant role in my life. My life will end on Umma, Miyoung… and to some extent Howan. Just thinking about that used to bring slight satisfaction and a slight regret.

Notes

I am sooo much into parent children relationship because currently i am watching a drama (indian) and it had sooo many emotions regarding this relationship that watching one episode i cried so much.... soo sooo sooo much.