Gratefulness~ pt.1

I close the door behind me and lean against it. I inhale and sigh. Too many incidents for just one night, I think to myself.

I burrow my suitcase and get jeans, a t-shirt and a warm sweater. I dry my hair with the hotel's hairdryer and use my own straightener to straighten it. I apply makeup lightly. I go get my MK handbag and I'm about to head looking for a nice place to have a lunch when I hear my phone ringing. It's Cecily.

"Omo! Omo! Ooooh!" she's screaming enthusiastically. I'm confused. I ask her what's wrong.
"YG was there! Wasn't he?" Cecily asks suggestively. Chills give me goose bumps and I admit seeing him.
"Oooh! It's really true! Omo! You must be really good singer since he offered you a record deal right away! Or.. At least he said something like that... I think you're going to have to be a trainee and do auditions first though."
"I..." I really don't know what I should say.
"I was very surprised. I haven't got hang of it yet."
"I see! I see! I can't wait to meet you and hear your singing! You are accepting the deal, right? You have to! I have to hear you singing!"
I utter an akward laugh. I couldn't properly understand the fact that YG had really offered me a place in the YG family. I'm just quiet, not saying a word.

"Hey! YG is here!" Cecily exclaims and I can hear her greeting the CEO. Suddenly I feel my cheeks getting hot and I wiggle myself out of the sweater. I sit down on the luxurious sofa and look at my bare toes as I'm listening to their Korean conversation.
After a while, Cecily says:
"YG wants to speak with you."
I cough nervously.
"Hi", a low man voice says.
"Hello", I greet him in a friendly manner.
"Are you ready to train? You want to sing, don't you?" he asks persistenly and I feel myself very nervous. He said he would give me some time to think!
"I.. I g-guess so. Can I think about it...?"
"You are going to be a singer in Finland?" YG continues his interrogation.
"No! No", I rush to answer.
"I would really like to be a singer under your company. I would be very honoured.."
"Good. Great."
"But I have to talk to my family and friends about all this", I mutter.
"Yes, yes. But remember, it's all about you. They will understand", YG tries his everything to convince me.
"Yes. I know. This just happened so fast..."
"It always does", YG says coldly. Then he suddenly laughs.
"But you are welcome. Contact me soon." YG hangs up Cecily's phone and I stay still, staring at the screen blankly. Strange. That's the only word that comes up in my mind.

"Duck Beijing", I tell to the waiter and point at a delicious looking picture on the menu. I must get used to Asian food if I want to start working here. I had always imagined myself as a teacher or as a travel guide since I like to study languages. But even though I like to sing and whenever the house is empty, I always sing, I still never could have imagined myself as a professional singer. I wasn't that great. In my opinion. I also know that dancing is a big part of Korean music business, and kpop especially, and then I realize how convenient this job actually is for me. I love dancing. I have taken some dance classes but just a couple. I have never trained anything seriously. Just like I haven't trained singing either but maybe I will learn. I'm quick to learn new things!

I sit down at the table near the window. I lean on my arm and look at the direction where the Hotel ICON is. A fan crowd have gathered near the opposite building. They are thronging in front of the doors. Big Bang's interview has started.
I dig up a leaflet, which I found from the hall, and start reading Korean words and phrases. My phone beeps. I have recieved a text message. I'm expecting it to be from my mom or from Sara because I haven't sent them any messages today. But it's from Cecily. It says: "Hey again! YG is hosting a party in a nightclub tonight. You wanna come? There will be many kpop artists and celebrities as well as Big Bang. We here in YG don't usually invite even any trainees or family members in these parties but I thought that you wouldn't be any harm for us. Cecily" I cover my mouth as I'm reading the message. What the heck now? I can't handle all this. I repeat all the things I have already experienced during this trip: a night with GD, a record deal(?) from YG Entertainment and now an invitation to a celebrity party. Oh my goosh, I think to myself. My hands are shaking as I try to write an answer to Cecily. "Wow! This is so unbelievable! But, of course, I can't say no..." Cecily texts me back soon. "Good! I will be there too wating for you! I will ask Jamie to pick you up at 7. See you there!" I guess I have to get accustomed to living in a dream...

After eating my the delicious dish, I walk back to the hotel. The interview has ended and BB members may be at the hotel or maybe in another meeting. I don't know.
I step out of the elevator and turn right. I get the key card out of my handbag and lift it near the handle. I hear strange rustle behind me and I turn around to see where the voice comes from.
There's a black-haired short girl sitting against the glass railing. She freezes as she sees me. She crams the snack bag in her shopping bag and stares at me. She looks Korean but I can't be sure.
"Hey", I say to break the akward silence. The girl is staring at me and after a while she ventures to ask me with a quiet voice:
"Do you know where Big Bang is staying?" I smile by myself when I realize that she has come here to stalk her idols.
"They are staying here, right?" she's speaking English fluently and ogling at me with her hazelnut eyes. I guess she's maybe same age as me but it's so hard to tell. Koreans always look way younger than they really are. I nod a little and her eyes brighten right away.
"Oh", she gasps.
"Aren't you the girl who came from the front? During the show. Are you a celebrity?" she asks and looks at me her mouth open. She squeezes her shopping bag and greets me with a nod. I nod back.
"How do you know?" I ask without answering her questions.
"Omo! Ah! I saw you in the monitor. I was there too", she tells.
"You were so pretty."
"I'm not anymore?" I laugh.
"Oh! Mianhe! No, you are. Very beautiful", she corrects quickly and keeps nodding her head.
"Are you someone famous? You are not Korean." I smile and take a look around the corridor. I'm not but... Hey. Actually, I could say so, I think to myself.
"How should I put it... You are going to be happy when you hear about me next time." The girl is staring at me astonished and tries to understand my words. Just the reaction I wanted to see.
"Annyeonghi gaseyo", I smile and disappear in my hotel room.

I hang my jacket and drop the handbag on the floor. I look at myself in the mirror. I was a girl just like her. I don't know what I'm doing... Should I really choose a kpop star career? I have read about their lifestyle at home in Finland and I've found out how hard it can be. On the other hand, I'm a person who need challenges. But I'm also sensitive. Something inside of me is burning and the feeling is growing and growing every second. I look at myself. "I can do this." I inhale loudly. I really want to do this. At least, I want to try it.
I can always run away before I sign the official contract, right?

I turn around and go get some grape juice that I had bought at the airport. I pour juice in a glass and lift the glass on my lips when I see something odd on the table in the livingroom. I place the glass back on the counter.
It's a lonely black rose. There's a note under it. I take them and wonder how they have gotten in my room. The note reads:

"Thank you for being there for me. You are very nice and pretty girl. Komawo xx" and then there's a signature. I squint.

G-Dragon

I decide to call mom before I start getting ready for the party.
"Minea! Oh, good that you called", I can hear that she's relieved to hear my voice. I laugh. She must have been worried about me.
"Is everything OK? When are you coming back home?"
"Yeah, everything's great. And I think... I'm gonna stay here for a little while."




[ END OF PART 1 ]


>>[ PART 2 ]<<

Notes

To be continued...

PT 2 will be released soon ~~