The way which the wind blows

Your POV
This can’t be happening. My heart feels like it’s going to burst. I watch the video again, and again and again. I still can’t believe it. In an interview with Exo, it is said that Sehun is possibly dating Nari from Wassup. “You were caught dancing with Nari, and fans say they see you spend quite a lot of time with her.” Says the host. “I like Nari a lot. She is funny, nice, caring and she is beautiful. But I don’t think I have that kind of relationship with her.” Replies Sehun. Then in another interview with Wassup, Nari said “I like Sehun a lot too.” “Can you say ‘I love you’ to Sehun?” The host joked. After hesitating, Nari said “I love you Sehun.” She blushed and hid her face from the camera. I don’t know how to feel about this. It makes me annoyed and hurt. I know Sehun said that they don’t have ‘that’ type of relationship; of course he doesn’t, because I’m his girlfriend. But still, I feel, lonely. He shouldn’t do things where people will misunderstand. I feel so selfish.

I call Sehun tonight. After a lot of rings, he finally picks up. “Hey (Y/N).” He says bluntly. “What is it?” His voice makes me weak. I haven’t heard it in a while, and yet he sounds like he doesn’t want to talk to me. “Um. Hi. Are you busy right now?” I ask.
“It depends. Is what you have to say to me important?” he asks flatly.
“Um, no.”
“Then I can get back to training.”
“Ah! No!” I say desperately. I need to ask him about Nari. “It’s somewhat important…”
“OK. I’m listening.” He says.
“Um. So, I was watching a recent video that came out. An interview. Um…I just wanted to ask if you and Nari, were a thing.” I say uneasily.
He scoffs. “Are you serious? You interrupted my training for this?”
“Yes I’m serious. This is serious.” I say, getting annoyed.
“Why would you even ask about me and Nari? You’re my girlfriend. Not her. Even if you weren’t my girlfriend, I don’t think the company would allow me to date her.”
“So you would date her if the company let you?”
“Why are you getting irritated over this?” he asks sharply. Damn, he’s getting angry.
“Why wouldn’t I get irritated? She said she loved you. That’s a big deal.” Luckily I’m talking to him over the phone, otherwise he would see my tears.
“Listen. Don’t get angry. It’s nothing. I have to go.” With that, he hangs up. He didn’t even wait for a goodbye. He didn’t even answer my question. I feel so empty.

*A month later*

This is it. I can’t take it anymore. How could he say that he and Nari didn’t have that type of relationship? I read the article again and look and the photographs again. ‘Nari and Sehun seen kissing outside the SM Entertainment building.’ The article says. I can’t continue reading because everything is just a blur. How can he do this to me? The last time we called, he said there was nothing between them. Well, the last time we called, it was ages ago. A lot could have progressed between them. Sehun doesn’t ask to see if I am free, he doesn’t call me anymore, I never see him mention me on shows or interviews. It makes me sick. He doesn’t even text me, not like Luhan. Luhan texts me good morning everyday. He asks about my day and we engage in a nice conversation. I can get comfortable around him. Then he texts me good night when we go to bed. He puts more effort into making me smile than Sehun. I’m starting to think maybe Luhan is more of a suitable boyfriend than Sehun. I mentally slap myself. What am I thinking? How could I doubt Sehun like that? I should think rationally; fans are crazy, and they could make up all types of rumors, and maybe the photo is photo shopped. Yeah. That’s right. I text Sehun asking when he is free. ‘I might be free soon. I’ll update you on when I’m free. Did you want to go anywhere particular?’ That sounds more like Sehun. ‘No, I just want to see you.’ I text back. My phone chimes; ‘OK. Hope to see you soon, beautiful.’ His text makes me smile. And I attempt to text back ‘I will see you soon, handsome.’ But my fingers stiffen at ‘handsome’. It feels wrong to type it. My whole body has gone stiff. So I end up texting; ‘I will see you soon.’ I don’t understand why I couldn’t reply like I usually do. I just hope, that everything will be back to normal after I see him.

Notes